Latest Jokes Status of 2014

Dear Facebook..!
.
.
. .
Whenever I Add A Girl,
You Always Ask Me-
"Do You Know Her???
.
.
I Just Want To Ask-
.
.

Behan Lagti Hai Wo Teri..???? - Uniteddj.com

Latest Jokes Status of 2014

Dear Facebook..!
.
.
. .
Whenever I Add A Girl,
You Always Ask Me-
"Do You Know Her???
.
.
I Just Want To Ask-
.
.

Behan Lagti Hai Wo Teri..???? - Uniteddj.com

Latest Facebook jokes of 2014

LOL time ....

Teacher : What will u do after grown up ?
Student : Facebooking
Teacher : No! I mean what will u Become ?
Student : Admin of facebook pages
Teacher : O My God! I Mean what will u achieve after u grown up ?
Student : Facebook Admin Rights
Teacher : Idiot! I Mean what will u do 4 ur Parents ?
Student : I create a page for them on facebooK. "I Luv Mom n Dad.
Teacher : Stupid! What do ur parents want from U? :@
Student : My facebook password.
Teacher : Oh God! What is the purpose of ur Life ? ;>
Student : Facebook but never face a book...
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Insult jokes of 2014

insult:-xD
BOY-ek ladki ko rose dete hue kaha YE RISTA
KYA KEHLATA HA
.
GIRL-pavitra rista
.
.
BOY-to Is pyar ko kya naam du?
.
.
.
. GIRL- EK hazaro me meri behna hai
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Funny Pic Status For facebook.com

Hahaha
- unitedDj.com

Latest Funny Pic Status For facebook.com

Hahaha
- unitedDj.com

Latest funny jokes of 213

"GALTI MERI THI"
Usne mujhe chaha hi nahi
Main chahat samajh baitha.
“GALTI MERI THI”

Uski pal bhar ki muskurahat ko pyar samjh baitha.
“GALTI MERI THI”

Wo to har baat par haan karti thi
Main hi ikraR samjh baitha .
“GALTI MERI THI”

Usne mujhse ziyada ehmiyat di mere doston ko
Main uski ye ada mazakh samjh baitha
“GALTI MERI THI”

Usne kaha bhi tha koi or hai meri zindagi mE
Main hi khud ko uski zindagi samajh baitha

“GALTI MERI HI THI, MERI
HI THI"
- uniteddj.com

latest Funny punjabi Jokes of 2013

ਨਾਕੇ ਤੇ ਪੁਲਿਸ ਵਾਲੇ ਮੋਟਰਸਾਈਕਲ ਚੋ
ਚਾਬੀ ਤੇ ਐ ਕੱਢਦੇ ਨੇ.
. .

. .
. .
.
. . .
. . . ਜਿਵੇਂ ਸਾਲਿਆ ਨੇ ਦਾਜ ਚ ਦਿੱਤਾ ਹੋਵੇ
- Uniteddj.com

latest funny jokes of 2013 for facebook.com

Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
.
.
Santa: Tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi
ho, .
.
.
Wife: Main toh maa banne wali
hoon! .
.
.
Santa: Main bhi toh baap banne wala
hoon.

haha lolzz likr to banta hai yrr
- Uniteddj.com

latest funny jokes of 2013 for facebook.com

Wife: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
.
.
Santa: Tum bhi toh kitni moti ho gayi
ho, .
.
.
Wife: Main toh maa banne wali
hoon! .
.
.
Santa: Main bhi toh baap banne wala
hoon.

haha lolzz likr to banta hai yrr
- Uniteddj.com

Latest funny jokes of 2013

PYAr
. .
.
. . . .
.
. China Ka MaAl Hai..!!
.
Chale To Chand Tak Wrna ShaAm Tk
- uniteddj.com

Latest Santa-banta jokes of 2013

Santa to Banta :
Agr tu bata de ki meri Tokri me kya h
toh tokri k aadhe Ande tere..
Aur ye bhi bata de ki
Ande Kitne h... to 10 k 10 tere....
Aur agar ye Bhi bata de ki
Ande Kiske h... to Murgi bhi teri....
.
.
.
Banta : Abey koi HINT TO De...!
- uniteddj.com

Latest friends jokes of 2013 for facebook.com / Twitter.com

3 kaale dost ek sath ja rahe the...
.
Raste me ek pari milti hai,
.
Pari-"ek-ek wish batao main poori karugi."
.
.
1st.-"Mujhe gora aur khubsurat kardo.
"Pari ne kar dia.
.
2nd-"mujhe bhi aisa hi kar do."Pari ne kar diya.
.
.
. 3rd zor zor se hasne laga or phir bola........
"Inko wapas pehle jaisa kardo......
.
Moral- Har ek Friend kamina hota hai....
- uniteddj.com

Latest jokes of 2013 for facebook.com / Twitter.com

2 lovers,
ek plate me PANI-PURI kha rahe the
.
.
.
Ek-dusre ki aankho me aankhe daal
ke
Girl- (sharmate huye) - aise kyu dekh rahe ho
.

.
Boy- ek do toh mujhe bhi kha lene
de bhuki
- Uniteddj.com

Latest jokes for facebook.com / Twitter.com

Great thinking . . .

Whats The Difference Between
Like & Love

When You Like A Flower
U Just Pluck It..!
But
When You Love A Flower
U Water It Daily....!!
- UnitedDj.com

Latest jokes for facebook.com / whats App

2 student raat me padhte huye
. . .
. .
1st:"kitne baje hai yaar.. ??
.
.
.
. . 2nd ne patthar uthakar samne girls hostel me mara.

1 ladki nikli boli:" kamino ab to so jao raat ke 2 baj rahe hai.

Kamine Boys
- uniteddj.com

Latest jokes for facebook.com

Ek baar 2 Mouse Bike Par Ja Rahe The .
Sher Ka baccha Mila .
Usne kaha Muje B Bike Par Le Chalo.
.
.
.
Chuho Ne Kuch Socha Fir Bole -
"Dekh Le ,Baad Me Teri Mummy Bolegi Tu
Gundo Ke Saath Ghumta hai "
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Funny jokes of 2013

Boy & Girl on First Date..

Girl : kitna seedha hai..
.
Boy : kya maal hai..

. Girl : nice behaviour..
.
Boy : kash pat jaye..

.
Girl : dressing sense zabardast hai.
.
Boy : skirt, top mein aur hot lagegi.
.

Girl : agar razi ho gaya toh isise shadi
karungi..

Boy : bas 1 baar haa karde mujhe
konse shadi karni hai..
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Funnny jokes

Sabse zyada kaminepan wala mazaq
kya ho
sktahai ???
. .

Socho....
.
. . .
Socho....
. .
.

. . Kisi ke shampoo ke bottle me VEET dal
dena....
3 minute mei khubsurati ka ehsas... ..
- uniteddj.com

Latest Friends Funny jokes

1st Friend:" Yaar Mai Jis Ladki Ko
Chahta Hu,
Usne Mujhse Shadi Nahi Ki..
2nd Friend:" Tumne Use Bataya K

Tera
Chacha
Crorepati Hai ??
1st Friend:" Haa mene bataya Tha..
2nd Friend:" To Phir ??
.
.
.
1st Friend:" Ab Wo Meri Chachi Hai..
- UniteDDj.com .

Latest Friends Funny jokes

1st Friend:" Yaar Mai Jis Ladki Ko
Chahta Hu,
Usne Mujhse Shadi Nahi Ki..
2nd Friend:" Tumne Use Bataya K

Tera
Chacha
Crorepati Hai ??
1st Friend:" Haa mene bataya Tha..
2nd Friend:" To Phir ??
.
.
.
1st Friend:" Ab Wo Meri Chachi Hai..
- UniteDDj.com .

Funny jokes of 2013

Ek Khargosh roj ek ladki k pas jata or kehta.. "GAJAR"hai ?? Ladki inkar kar deti.. . . Ek din Ladki ko bahut gussa aaya or us ne khargosh K daant tod diye.. . . Aur kaha K ab tu "GAJAR" kha K dikha Phir . . . . . . Phir kya ?? . . Agley din khargosh Aaya or bola- GAJAR KA HALWA HAI..???

Funny jokes of 2013

Ek Khargosh roj ek ladki k pas jata or kehta.. "GAJAR"hai ?? Ladki inkar kar deti.. . . Ek din Ladki ko bahut gussa aaya or us ne khargosh K daant tod diye.. . . Aur kaha K ab tu "GAJAR" kha K dikha Phir . . . . . . Phir kya ?? . . Agley din khargosh Aaya or bola- GAJAR KA HALWA HAI..???

Classroom Latest Funny jokes

Chemistry ki class mein Sir ne 1 Ladki
se
poocha!
"What is Nitrate..?"
.
.
.
Ladki sharma kar boli
.

.

.
"Kya sir, aap bhi na qasam se ekdum
direct
ho
jaate ho...
NIGHT RATE is 5000/- sirf aap k
liye...aur
hotel
ka alag
- uniteddj.com

Classroom Latest Funny jokes

Chemistry ki class mein Sir ne 1 Ladki
se
poocha!
"What is Nitrate..?"
.
.
.
Ladki sharma kar boli
.

.

.
"Kya sir, aap bhi na qasam se ekdum
direct
ho
jaate ho...
NIGHT RATE is 5000/- sirf aap k
liye...aur
hotel
ka alag
- uniteddj.com

Classroom Latest Funny jokes

Chemistry ki class mein Sir ne 1 Ladki
se
poocha!
"What is Nitrate..?"
.
.
.
Ladki sharma kar boli
.

.

.
"Kya sir, aap bhi na qasam se ekdum
direct
ho
jaate ho...
NIGHT RATE is 5000/- sirf aap k
liye...aur
hotel
ka alag
- uniteddj.com

Latest Funny jokes of 2013

I Ladki ne boy frnd ko fone kiya to uss ke bhanje ne

mobile phone uthaya.
Ladki:

Apne uncle ko phone do.
Bacha:

Aap ka name?

Ladki:

Apne uncle se kaho unn ki Jaan-e man ka phone hai.

Bacha: "lekin aunty mobile pe to "KUTIYA" likha hua hai.
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Funny jokes of 2014

Teacher- U
dnt luk
interested in

reading dis chapter... .
. .
.
. .
. .
Pappu- Ek
tum hi ho jo
mere dil ki
baat samajhti ho jaan...
- unitedDj.com

Latest Funnny jokes

log to P.M. Ke putle bna kar jala
dete h
.
. .
.
.
. .
.
hamn to putle ko P.M. bna kar
desh jala diya
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Jokes

3 chor Santa, Banta aur Kapil police se bachne ke
liye 3
borio me chup gaye.
Police wale ne pehle bori par lat maari.
Santa bola: bow bow..
Police wala: Isme kutta hai.
Fir dusri bori par lat mari..
Banta bola: meow meow...
Policewala: Isme billi hai...
Fir teesri bori par laat maari to koi awaaz nahi
aayi.
.
.
Toh usne do laat maari fir bhi koi awaaz nahi
aayi
. .
fir 20-25 laat marne ke baad
Kapil zor se bola: Saale haramkhor aaloo hun
aaloo..
- Uniteddj.com

Latest Jokes

3 chor Santa, Banta aur Kapil police se bachne ke
liye 3
borio me chup gaye.
Police wale ne pehle bori par lat maari.
Santa bola: bow bow..
Police wala: Isme kutta hai.
Fir dusri bori par lat mari..
Banta bola: meow meow...
Policewala: Isme billi hai...
Fir teesri bori par laat maari to koi awaaz nahi
aayi.
.
.
Toh usne do laat maari fir bhi koi awaaz nahi
aayi
. .
fir 20-25 laat marne ke baad
Kapil zor se bola: Saale haramkhor aaloo hun
aaloo..
- Uniteddj.com

JokesBlast - Latest Funny jokes ,

Khushi:- Jab Biwi Pregnant Ho
.
.
.
Darr:- Jab Girlfriend Pregnant Ho
.
.
.
Khauf:- Jab Dono Pregnant Ho .
. .
Haadsa:- Pata Chale K,
Aap Dono K Papa Nahi Ho.
- Uniteddj.com

Funny Jokes of Relationship

Relationship status -
.
.
my right hand to me like: - "Bhai, Gf bna le koi,
.
.
.
.
. Kab tak
mujhse kaam chalayega"
- Uniteddj.com

Funny jokes , Funny Status

Santa to girl :
Agar tu bata de ki meri Tokri me kya hai
toh tokri k aadhe Ande tere..
Aur ye bhi bata de ki
Ande Kitne hai... to 10 k 10 tere....
Aur agar ye Bhi bata de ki
Ande Kiske hai... to Murgi bhi teri....
. .

. .

Girl :koi HINT TO De yar ...!
- UnitedDj.com

Santa to girl :
Agar tu bata de ki meri Tokri me kya hai toh tokri k aadhe Ande tere.. Aur ye bhi bata de ki Ande Kitne hai... to 10 k 10 tere.... Aur agar ye Bhi bata de ki Ande Kiske hai... to Murgi bhi teri.... . . . . . Girl :koi HINT TO De yar ...!

2 Girls face to face: . . 1st: hi sweetheart 2nd: hi, Darling .. And when they talk on their backs about them . . 1st: she is so selfish (matlabi) . . 2nd: she is kamini . . . . 2 Boys face to face: . . 1st: kesa hey kamenay? lal shirt main tu pura yeda lag raha hy . . 2nd: kutte, apne baap se mazakk:? . . And when they talk on their backs . . 1st: mast banda hy yar . . 2nd: bhai hy apna.. Bhai.. Agree boys ... ?? - uniteddj.com

2 Girls face to face: . . 1st: hi sweetheart 2nd: hi, Darling .. And when they talk on their backs about them . . 1st: she is so selfish (matlabi) . . 2nd: she is kamini . . . . 2 Boys face to face: . . 1st: kesa hey kamenay? lal shirt main tu pura yeda lag raha hy . . 2nd: kutte, apne baap se mazakk:? . . And when they talk on their backs . . 1st: mast banda hy yar . . 2nd: bhai hy apna.. Bhai.. Agree boys ... ?? - uniteddj.com

Santa apni g.f nu = i love u darling main tainu bahut pyar karda aa . . G.F. = i m lesbian huh . . . Santa = hainnnnnn n g oh ki hunda?? . G.f= jisnu girls wich interest hunda . . . Santa= fir main vi lesbian hi aa saaliye hahahahahaha - Uniteddj.com

During Interview External : There are 50 bricks on an airplane. If u drop 1 outside. Hw many are left? Student : That's easy, 49. External : What are the 3 steps to put an elephant into a fridge? Student : Open the fridge. Put the elephant in. Close the fridge. External : What are the four steps to put a deer into the fridge? Student : Open the fridge. Take the elephant out. Put the deer in. Close the fridge. External : It's lion's birthday, all animals are there except one, why? Student : Because the deer is in the fridge. External : How does an old woman cross a swamp filled with crocodiles? Student : She just crosses it because the crocodiles are at the lion's birthday External : Last question. In the end the old lady still died. Why? Student : Er....I guess she drowned? External : No! She was hit by the brick fallen from the airplane. U may leave nw.. - Uniteddj.com

LADKA: Tum kya karogi agar main mar gaya to? . . . . LADKI : (Mazaq Se) Main to bohat khush ho jaungi Next din ladki ko pata chala k ladka mar gaya hai. or . 1 letter chhod gaya.. . . Uspe likha tha... . . . . Jaan bhi koi badi cheez nahi thi tumhare khushi ke liye !!! - uNiteddj.com

LADKA: Tum kya karogi agar main mar gaya to? . . . . LADKI : (Mazaq Se) Main to bohat khush ho jaungi Next din ladki ko pata chala k ladka mar gaya hai. or . 1 letter chhod gaya.. . . Uspe likha tha... . . . . Jaan bhi koi badi cheez nahi thi tumhare khushi ke liye !!! - uNiteddj.com

Gf: Meri mummy ko tum bahut pasand aaye ho . . . Pappu : Chal Pagli . . . Kuchh bhi ho . . main shadi tumse hi karunga... Aunty se kehna wo mujhe bhool jayen..

Ek ladki , ladke se Boli Please please mera Rs 100 ka Recharge Kar va Do , Ladka bola Mere Pass Paise nai hai , Sorry Ladki Boli Tere Pass toh Kbi Paise hote hi nai hai , ullu Aaj Ke Baad mujhe kbi Mat Bulana . . Ladka , Ladki Se Bola Tu Choor Gayi mujhe , Bol K ULLU , Mere Hath mai 1000 ka Note , Tere hath Mai BABA JI THULLU .

Dad : Result kya aaya ? Boy : Aai chya gavat, fail ho gaya.. Dad : Besharam! Nalayak.. Boy : Kuch bhi karne ka, Mera ego hurt nahi karne ka.. Dad : Aaj se teri pocket money band.. Boy : Meri jaroorat kam hai, Isi liye meri zameer me dum hai.. Dad : Get out.. Boy : Aata Maaji satakli re.. Dad : Mujhe ab papa mat kehna.. . . . Boy : Ae Gotya.. Gotya.. Gotya... - Uniteddj.com

Dad : Result kya aaya ? Boy : Aai chya gavat, fail ho gaya.. Dad : Besharam! Nalayak.. Boy : Kuch bhi karne ka, Mera ego hurt nahi karne ka.. Dad : Aaj se teri pocket money band.. Boy : Meri jaroorat kam hai, Isi liye meri zameer me dum hai.. Dad : Get out.. Boy : Aata Maaji satakli re.. Dad : Mujhe ab papa mat kehna.. . . . Boy : Ae Gotya.. Gotya.. Gotya... - Uniteddj.com

GREAT Line Said By SIR ABDUL KALAM :- . . I m not a"HANDSOME Man" . . But I give my"HAND"to"SOME "one who needs help..! Beauty is in Heart, not in Face ... - Uniteddj.com

Aaj Saveere Ik Kudi Fasgi . . . . . . . Traffic Vich Barri Mushkil naal nikli fr. - Uniteddj.com

Ladki: Is mirror ki kya keemat he?? SHOPKEEPER : Rs.1000 ! . . Ladki: ohh.. bahut mehnga he.. kya isme koi khas baat he?? . . SHOPKEEPER: aap isko 100 floor se niche girao, . ye mirror 99 floor tak nai tutega... . . . Ladki : Wow.. PACK kardo bhaiya !!! Girlz r alwayz Dumb - uniteddj.com Papa: Beta Facebook Ke Bahar Bhi Ek Duniya Hai..!! . . . . . . Beta: Ohh Really Papa….?? Zara Link To Send Karna Uska - uniteddj.com Ghar ki bani desi ghee ki mithai or parathe lekar Ma-Baap college me padh rahe bete se milne gaye.. . . Unhe saade kapdo me dekh k 1 ladki ne pucha :- "who r they.?" . . Ladke ne kaha "They r d servants from my village" . . Ma-Baap ki aankho me khushi k aansu aa gaye.. Humara beta aab angreji bolne laga he - uniteddj.com

LADKA: Tum kya karogi agar main mar gaya to? . . . . LADKI : (Mazaq Se) Main to bohat khush ho jaungi . . . . . Next din ladki ko pata chala k ladka mar gaya hai. . . or . . . . . 1 letter chhod gaya.. . . . . Uspe likha tha... . . . . . . . . Jaan bhi koi badi cheez nahi thi tumhare khushi ke liye !!! - uniteddj.com

Kiss krte hue bhale hi naak beech mein naa aati ho... but . . . . . . Bandi ladke k haath zroor pakad leti hai... - uniteddj.com

Kiss krte hue bhale hi naak beech mein naa aati ho... but . . . . . . Bandi ladke k haath zroor pakad leti hai... - uniteddj.com

Ek Acident huaa.. Bahut Bheed jama ho gayi.. Santa ko dekhne ka mauka nahi mil raha tha! . . usne bahut koshish ki par kucch b nhi dekh paya . . Santa dimaag laga kar bola – Ye mera BAAP hai.. . . Bheed pichhe hati.. . . . To dekha KUTTA maraa pada tha.!.. - uniteddj.com

Dulha romantic Andaz me Bola may I Kiss u darling ? . . . . . . . . . Dulhan Sharmatae Hue Boli Humne To kabhi Gairo ko bhi Manaa Nai kiya, Aap Toh Fir bhi Apne Ho - Uniteddj.com

Suhagrat pe ladka bivi ko sirf kiss kr k so gaya. Subah maa boli, "Bahu, mandir jane se pehle naha lo "Bahu- gusse me"Sirf brush kr leti hu maji, baki sb fresh hai - Uniteddj.com Ladki pic upload karke likhti hai : hii friendzz kesi lag rahi hoon..? . . . . . . . Boy : tere baap ne 15-20 hazar ka mob. Leke diya hai to ghar me 500rs ka sheesha bhi lagaya hoga.... Uss Mein dekh le,,...!!!....h umse kya poochti hai 'bhootni' kahi ki.... :0 - Uniteddj.com Santa K Dono Kaan Jal Gaye Doctor : Tumharey Kaan Kese jaly ? Santa : Main Qameez Istari Kar Raha tha ke Phone Aa Gaya. Main ne Jaldi main Phone ki Jagah Istari Kaan ko Laga Li..! Doctor : To Doosra Kaan Kese Jala ? . . . . Santa : Ab Ambulance ko Bhi Phone Karna Tha Na - Uniteddj.com

Sardar: I hav’nt slept all nite in the train. Friend: Y? Sardar: Got upper berth. Friend: Y did’nt u ecchanged? Sardar: oye, there was nobody 2 exchange in the lower birth.. - UnitedDj.com

Girl to kapil: "Aap mujhe lift denge to main apko apna cell no.. dungi . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Kapil:" Jahan bol wahan chhor dunga, number vmber rehne de bas mujhe pyaz ke pakode khila dena bahen.. Hahahaha Thoko , Thoko Likes..

Har maa ki 1 hi dua.. . . . Aag lag jaye tumhare is phone ko 24 ghante tuk tuk tuk tuk... . Agree friends ?? = Hit Like - UnitedDj.com Girl : Aaj mere dad ne mjhe tumhare Sath bike pe jate huay dekh liya.. Boy : oohh !! kia bole wo ?? . . Girl : Bas wohi hua jis ka dar Tha. Bus ka kiraya wapis le liya. Humari Family boht strict hai na !!! - UnitedDj.com Husband: Tere baap ki jale per namak chidkne ki adat gai nai . . . . wife: kyo kya huwa . . . . . Husband: aj phr se puch raha tha Meri beti se shadi karke khush to ho na... - UnitedDj.com Dad – Dear, I want you to marry a girl of my choice. Son – no way.. Dad - She is the daughter of world's richest man. Son – then its done. Then his dad goes to that richest man.. Dad - I want your daughter to marry my son. Rich man – nope Dad: He is the COO of world bank. Rich man – then its done. Then Dad again goes to president of bank. He asked – appoint my son the COO of the world bank. Him – Never Dad: – He is the son in law of World's richest man. Him – then its fine. - UnitedDj.com *Hr Biwi Ki Dua* Ya Khuda Mere shohar Ko Taraki DE . Dolat de Bangla De . Mujhe Ku ch Ni Chahiye Tu Sab Mere shohar Ko .de . . . BAKi. ...US se lena mera kaam. - UnitedDj.com Boss- Pin de, Employee-abc2313 Boss- abee stapler pin mang raha hu BBM pin nahi....!!! Android waale aise behave kar rahe hai jaise gaav mein naya "TV" aaya hai. - UnitedDj.com Husband: Call Me Shonu Wife: mera Shona Babu... . Husband : arrrrre.,,,CallMe Sweetheart Wife : my sweetu ... Sweetheart.... Husband: ufffff ...... Call Me Honey.. Wife: Mera hannu darling .... Husband : O pagal aurat, call kar mujhe, balance nhi hai Wife: Oho ... ok ok... Abhi karti hu!.. - UnitedDj.com Our generation's sleeping schedule depends on . . . . . . . . . . . . the percentage of battery remaining in the phone... - UnitedDj.com

Andheri Raat.. Toofani barish.. . . . . Girl:" Come on dear get in 2 my umbrella... . . . . . Boy:" its ok sister thanx & runs away . . Moral:" Moral woral kuch nai Ladki k pair ulte the.... - UnitedDj.com .....Diwali Tips...... . .. .. .. Aap ke gf/bf ke diye huve aur aapke chhupaye huve photos/love letters/gifts utha lo varna.... . . . . . Ghar ki saaf-safai karty samay aap ki mummy ko wo sab mil sakta hai... Aur . . . Uske bad aapke ghar me diwali se pehle hi patakhe fut sakte hai Sab k fayde ki bat h , like to kr do kamino - UnitedDj.com Bhagwan ji agar sun rahe ho toh ek question poochna tha . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Mere leye bhi koi 'Awwwww' karne wali banayi hai ya bhool gaye? - UnitedDj.com , Ek Baat Jo. . . Sab Se Jyada Bar Ek Friend Apne Dusre Friend Se Kehta Hai . . . "Tare Maal Ko bol Mera v Setting Karava de...." Agree? - UnitedDj.com Duniya Me Ek Aisa Snake Hai, Jo Har Second Me 0.5 Centimeter Badhta Hai, Or Wo Agar Apne Munh Se Apne Jism K Kisi Bhi Hisse Ko Touch Kar Le To Wo Mar Jata Hai. Ye Duniya Ka Sabse Jhreela Snake Hai . . . . . Jo Ki Nokia 1100 K Game Zone Me Paya Jata Hai. - UnitedDj.com

ਇੱਕ ਵਾਰ ਝੰਡੇ ਦੀ ਮੁਰਗੀ ਮਰੀ ਤਾਂ ਉਹ ਉਚੀ ਉਚੀ ਰੋਣ ਲਗ ਪਿਆ " . . . ਉਹਦਾ ਦੌਸਤ ਕੋਲੋ ਲਘੀਆਂ ਤਾ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ" ਕੀ ਹੋਈਆ ਝੰਡੇ ?? " . . ਝੰਡਾ " ਮੇਰੀ ਮੁਰਗੀ ਮਰ ਗ਼ਈ ਯਾਰ " . . ਦੋਸਤ " ਯਾਰ ਫਿਰ ਕੀ ਏ ਮੇਰਾ ਬੂੜਾ ਮਰੀਆ ਤਾਂ ਮੈਂ ਜਮਾਂ ਨੀ ਰੋਈਆ " . . ਝੰਡਾ ਵੀ ਫੱਟ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ " ਤੇਰਾ ਬੂੜਾ ਕਿਹੜਾ ਆੰਡੇ ਦਿੰਦੀ ਸੀ " . . ਹਾਹਾ ਠੋਕੋ ਲਾਈਕ - UnitedDj.com IN 2018. BIKHARI: Bhagwan ke naam pe kuch de de. ENGINEER : Ye le meri B.tech ki degree rakh le. . . . . BIKHARI: Tujhe chahiye to meri M.tech ki rakh le. :P :D - UnitedDj.com POGO Joke..! SunnyLeone class mein padha rhi thi. A for Apple B for Bat C for Cat . . . L for L*** . Sorry bachcho muh se nikal gaya. sabhi bacche ek sath bole : koi bat nahi madam Wapas muh mein le lo :P :D - UnitedDj.com Sante k baap ki #England se call aati hai.... Turrr turrrr.... Santa : Hello... ji kaun Dad : Hi..my son itz me... Santa : Are jo bhi ho Hindi mein baaat kro... English mein haath tight hai... Dad : Abhe tune 12th pass kari huyi hai fir bhi tere ko english nahi aati... yahan uk mein dekh ... Bache paida hote hi english bolte hai.....sharm kar.. - UnitedDj.com

Flight Me Pilot Ne Announce Kia : 'Hum Ek Ghante Me Land Karne Wale Hain." . Fir Wo Mic Band Karna Bhool Gya Aur Co-Pilot Se Bola : Abb To Bas Ek Garam Chai Piyunga, Fir Air Hostess Ki Pappi Lunga. . Air Hostess Ye Sun Kar Mic Band Karvane Ke Liye Bhaagi, Aur 1 Bachche K Pair Me Fas Kar Gir Gayi. . Bachcha Bola : 'Tujhe Badi Jaldi Hai Kamini. Suna Nahi? Wo Pehle Chai Piyega..!!! xD :P - UnitedDj.com eacher: Where is your Assignment book. . . ? . Me: Mam, I lost it While Fighting with Students Who Said That You Are Not The Most Beautiful Teacher In This College. . . ^_^ . . Teacher : Chal Hat Badmash !!! Next Week Tak De Dena !! Boys Are Boys :P :D - UnitedDj.com ਸੁਪਰ ਬੇਜ਼ਤੀ . ਜਮਾਤ 'ਚ ਬੋਰਿੰਗ ਲੈਕਚਰ ਚੱਲ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ .. ਅਚਾਨਕ ਇੱਕ ਮੁੰਡਾ ਉੱਠ ਕੇ ਬਾਹਰ ਚੱਲ ਗਿਆ .. ਲੈਕਚਰਾਰ ਪੁਛਦਾ: ਇਹ ਮੁੰਡਾ ਬਾਹਰ ਕਿਉ ਗਿਆ .. ?? . . ਮੁੰਡੇ ਦਾ ਦੋਸਤ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ: ਸਰ ਉਹਨੂੰ ਨੀਂਦ 'ਚ ਤੁਰਣ ਦੀ ਆਦਤ ਏ :P :D - UnitedDj.com ਨਰਸਰੀ ਦੇ ਬੱਚੇ ਨੇ ਪੇਪਰ ਦੇ ਪਹਿਲੇ ਪੰਨੇ ਤੇ ਪੇਸ਼ਾਬ ਕਰ ਦਿੱਤਾ..!!! . ਅਧਿਆਪਕ : ਕੰਜਰਾ ਇਹ ਕੀ ਕਰਤਾ ? . ਬੱਚਾ : ਬੇਬੇ ਨੇ ਕਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਕਿ ਪੇਪਰ 'ਚ ਪਹਿਲਾਂ ਜੋ ਆ ਰਿਹਾ ਹੋਵੇ ਉਹੀ ਕਰੀ !! :P :D - UnitedDj.com ਇੱਕ ਕੁੜੀ ਸਾਨੂੰ ਕਰਦੀ Pyar ਸੀ, ਸਾਨੂੰ ਵੀ ਤਾਂ ਹੋਏਆ ਇਸ਼ਕ ਦਾ ਬੁਖਾਰ ਸੀ, ਸਾਨੂੰ ਤੱਕ-ਤੱਕ ਨੀਵੀਂ ਪਾ ਕੇ ਹੱਸਦੀ ਸੀ ਉਹ, ਲੱਗਾ ਸਾਨੂੰ ਕਰਦੀ #Pyar ਦਾ ਇਜਹਾਰ ਸੀ, . ਪਰ ਉਹ ਤਾਂ ਬਾਅਦ 'ਚ ਪਤਾ ਲੱਗਾ ਓਹ ਤਾਂ ਪਾਗਲਖਾਨੇ ਤੋਂ ਫ਼ਰਾਰ ਸੀ..... xD :P - UnitedDj.com Ladka & Ladki standing at the bus stop: ladka to ladki: nice lipistic ladki : thanks ladka : nice top & jeans ladki : thanks Ladka : nice ear-ring ladki : thanks Ladka : nice neckless Ladki : thank u so much BHAIYA :)) Ladka: kamaal hai fir bhi bilkul chudel lag rahi ho :P :D - UnitedDj.com For Boys: WAY 2 IMPRESS a GIRL #Respect her, #Honour her #Love her, #Protect her, care 4 her BUT For Girls : HOW 2 IMPRESS A BOY Just #Smile :) . Sab khatm! Ladka Barbad !!! :P - UnitedDj.com ਪੱਪੂ ਨਰਸ ਨੂੰ:- ਮੈਨੂੰ ਇਕ ਖੂਨ ਦੀ ਬੋਤਲ ਚਾਹੀਦੀ ਆ . ਨਰਸ :- Blood Group ਦੱਸੋ ? . ਪੱਪੂ :- ਕੋਈ ਵੀ Group ਚੱਲੂ ਨਰਸ:- ਐਦਾਂ ਕਿਦਾਂ ਚੱਲੂ? . ਪੱਪੂ:- ਮੈਂ ਤਾਂ ਮਾਸ਼ੂਕ ਨੂੰ #Love ਲੈਟਰ ਲਿਖਣਾ ਆ " :P :D - UnitedDj.com Kapil & His Girl Friend on Phone Kapil : Kya Khaya Aaj Dinner Mein? GF : Tumhe Bas Yehi Baatein Karni Aati Hai.. Kapil : Ok.. To Yeh Batao.. How Should RBI Fight These Inflationary Trends With Minimum Intervention In The Money Markets? . > GF : Hmmmm.. Maine Khaya Tha Daal Chawal And Aalu Ki Sabzji..... :D :P - UnitedDj.com

Santa :"Jaan,tumhara naam apne haath pe likhu ya dil pe ? :)) . . . Girl :"Idhar udhar kyo likhtey ho... . .Agar sacha pyar krte ho to apni property k papers par likh do... . . .Santa :"Oo teri !!.. . Yaar ye ladkiyan kitne chalak hogyihai star plus dekh ke... - UnitedDj.com A Girl met her Boyfriend after a Long Break up. She told him : Sorry, I've met a new one, I have a new bf and another future.. How about your life? Boy closed his eyes to hide his tears, Remembered all the memories he shared with her, he Remembered how he shared his pain before his happy moments and how he Refused many other Girls Just to Stay with her he Kept the Remains of her pride and collected force, Smiled and said : Sorry mam, But Do I Know You ??? - UnitedDj.com Teacher: prasang sahit vyakhya karo "bheege honth tere pyasa dil mera" . student: yeh pankti bollywood ke ... prasiddh kavi sant imran hashmi ji ki rachna''murder'' ke'bheege honth'geet se li gayi hai.. is kavita mein kavi mayavi mallika sherawat ko sambhodit karte huey paani ka mahatva samjhate hain, ke agar aapke honth per 1 bund bhi paani ho toh samne jo bhi pyasa hai use pila do... aur in panktiyo se humko kavi ke dayalu hone ka ehsaas hota hai...!!.. - UnitedDj.com Girl : Aaj mere papa ne mujhe tumhare saath bikepar dekh liya... . . . . . . Boy : Kya bole woh...??? . . . . . . . Girl : Jis baat ka dar tha woi hua, unhone mujhse bus kiraye ke liye paise le liye... humari family bohot strict hai na... - UnitedDj.com

Ladke ne gali k kone me kachra fenk diya.. . Thodi der baad ghoom fir kar gali me aaya, To Mohalle wale aapas me lad rahe the k kachra kis ne fenka.. ?? . . . Ek aadmi ne ghusse se kaha:"Feka hoga kisi kutte k bachche ne.." . . . Ladka side me ja kar khoob hansa aur bola: "Kachra maine fainka Aur naam kutte k bachche ka lag gaya.." - UnitedDj.com ਕੁੜੀਆਂ - ਕੁੜੀਆਂ ਨੂੰ ਕੀ ਗਿਫਟ ਦਿੰਦੀਆਂ . . . . Suits Earring Parfume Flower Chocolates . ਮੁੰਡੇ ਕੀ ਦਿੰਦੇ . . . ਲੈ ਫੜ ਕੁੜੀ ਦਾ ਨੰਬਰ ਧਿਆਨ ਰੱਖੀਂ ਸਾਲਿਆ ਮੇਰਾ ਨਾਮ ਨਹੀ ਆਉਣਾ ਚਾਹੀ da LOL . . . . . . Hahahahaha - UnitedDj.com 4 Boys On Bike.. Police:" Triple Riding Is Banned Or Tum 4 Baithe Ho.. ?? . . Boys Shocked.. . . . Look Behind.. . . . . . And Says:" Saalo 5wa Kaha Gir Gaya.. ?? Hit Like For Kaminey Friends.. - UnitedDj.com A boy's eyes is faster than Google in searching a beautiful girl in crowd... . . But... . . . A boy's heart is slower than internet explorer while proposing girl whom he loves truly... .. agree. ?? - UnitedDj.com He: "Motivate kar" She: "Kisko?" He: "Kisko nahi...kiska?" She: "Kiska?" He: "Mera. Aa raha hun 30 mins mein. Moti, wait kar." *He is Dead*=)):D X_X - UnitedDj.com Best joke ever abt ladies driving: Doctor 2 injured patient: Jab car ek lady chala rahi thi to tumhe road se dur chalna chahiye tha. . . . . . Patient: abbe kon si road? Bhai me to garden me leta hua tha. lol - UnitedDj.com

A boy's facebook status during class: "yipppie I aM online From class".... . . . . . . . . Comment from his teacher: . . . . . Beta test me 0 mila hai Aa k dekhega ya tag karun..?? - UnitedDj.com 10 saal ka ladka:" 1 kingfisher Beer dena.. . . Dukandar:" Is umar me Beer peene lage.. ?? . . . . . . . Boy:" Nahi re, Ye chhote bhai k liye hai.. . Mere liye 1 Royal Stag ka Quater de... - UnitedDj.com 18 year old boy : Will u be my gf...??? .. 18 year old girl : No,get lost... . . . . . 5 year old boy : Will u be my gf...??? 18 year old girl : Awww ♥So sweet... yes yes, i will... . Hey bhagwan, ye kaisi leela hai teri.... - UnitedDj.com Ladki Ne Ghar Se bhaag K Shadi Ki.. 5 din baad Wo Rote Hue Lauti . . Dad:" Ab Kyun aayi Ho ?? . . . . . Ladki:" Papa Wo BMW ka driver Nikla, Iphone bhi China Wala Tha... Hahahah - UnitedDj.com Log kehte hai ki 40,000/- ka royal paint lagaye to ghar rangeen dikhta he. . . . . . . . . . . . Are pagal 400/-ki ROYAL STAG piyo, sara shehar rangeen dikhega..!... agree guys ? thoko like - UnitedDj.com Jab Maine "BEER" Pehli baar Pee thi, Main Khud Apni Nazron me gir gaya... . . Aur Maine "BEER" Chhodne ka faisla kar liya.. . . Par fir jab Maine Un tamaam "BEER" factory ke Mazdoor, Aur Unke biwi-Bacchhon ke Baare me Socha to Meri aankh bhar aayi... . . Aur Uss Pal Faisla kiya ki Ab se, I will Drink Regularly.. . . Apne liye to sab Jeete hain, Lekin, Hum to garibon ke liye peete hain.. CHEERS - UnitedDj.com A Good Teacher Is Who Tells To Study Hard... . . . . . But, . . . . . A Best Teacher Is Who Stands Outside The Examination Hall N Shouts.. . . "OYE CHECKING WALE AA GAYE APNI APNI PARCHI CHUPA LO.. - UnitedDj.com Roj Roj School Jane Ki VajahSe Tang Ek Ladka Aur 2 Ladkiya Ground Mein Bethe Baatein Kar Rahe The.. .. 1st Girl: “Yaar Kash Main Car Ke Niche Aa Jaun, 2 Mahine School Bandh” . . . 2nd Girl: “Kash Main Truck Ke Niche Aa Jau To5 Mahine School Bandh” . . . Ladka Fatak Se Bola: “Tum Dono Mere Niche AaJao 9 Mahine School Band... :D:D .. Boys Thoko Likes - UnitedDj.com

18 year old boy : Will u be my gf...??? .. 18 year old girl : No,get lost... . . . . . 5 year old boy : Will u be my gf...??? 18 year old girl : Awww ♥So sweet... yes yes, i will... . . Hey bhagwan, ye kaisi leela hai teri... Ladki Ne Ghar Se bhaag K Shadi Ki.. 5 din baad Wo Rote Hue Lauti . . Dad:" Ab Kyun aayi Ho ?? . . . . . Ladki:" Papa Wo BMW ka driver Nikla, Iphone bhi China Wala Tha... Hahahah

Ek ladki match dekhne gayi, lips par india ke tirange ka rang laga tha . . ek ladka aaya kiss kar gaya or bola . . . . . I LOVE MY INDIA.. . Ek Like tOh Banta hai LaDke par - UnitedDj.com Girl : Aaj mere papa ne mujhe tumhare saath bikepar dekh liya... . . . Boy : Kya bole woh...??? . . . . . . . Girl : Jis baat ka dar tha woi hua, unhone mujhse bus kiraye ke liye paise le liye... humari family bohot strict hai na... =));p - UnitedDj.com Ek Engineer 2 Cigarettes Pee RahaTha ........ . grl : 2 Cigarette Q Pee Rahe Ho ? . Engineer : Dost ki Yad Aa Rahi He, 1 Meri Or 1 Mere Dost ki... . . Kuch Din Baad Engineer 1 Cigarette Pee Raha Tha... . grl : Dost ko Bhool Gaye kYa? . Engineer : Nhi BewaKoof, Mene Cigarette Peena chor diYa H . Ab Sirf DosT ki Pee Rha Hu !!! - UnitedDj.com Ladkiyo Ki Comment Ke Neeche "ADD ME I AM BLOCKED" Likh Kar . . . . Ladke Sochte Hai Ke Ladki Unhe "Add" Karegi . . . Par Aisa Karke Unhe Kya Milta Hai..???? . . . "Baba Ji Ka Thullu" - UnitedDj.com

Ek ladki match dekhne gayi, lips par india ke tirange ka rang laga tha . . ek ladka aaya kiss kar gaya or bola . . . . . I LOVE MY INDIA.. . Ek Like tOh Banta hai LaDke par - UnitedDj.com Girl : Aaj mere papa ne mujhe tumhare saath bikepar dekh liya... . . . Boy : Kya bole woh...??? . . . . . . . Girl : Jis baat ka dar tha woi hua, unhone mujhse bus kiraye ke liye paise le liye... humari family bohot strict hai na... =));p - UnitedDj.com Ek Engineer 2 Cigarettes Pee RahaTha ........ . grl : 2 Cigarette Q Pee Rahe Ho ? . Engineer : Dost ki Yad Aa Rahi He, 1 Meri Or 1 Mere Dost ki... . . Kuch Din Baad Engineer 1 Cigarette Pee Raha Tha... . grl : Dost ko Bhool Gaye kYa? . Engineer : Nhi BewaKoof, Mene Cigarette Peena chor diYa H . Ab Sirf DosT ki Pee Rha Hu !!! - UnitedDj.com Ladkiyo Ki Comment Ke Neeche "ADD ME I AM BLOCKED" Likh Kar . . . . Ladke Sochte Hai Ke Ladki Unhe "Add" Karegi . . . Par Aisa Karke Unhe Kya Milta Hai..???? . . . "Baba Ji Ka Thullu" - UnitedDj.com

Ek ladki match dekhne gayi, lips par india ke tirange ka rang laga tha . . ek ladka aaya kiss kar gaya or bola . . . . . I LOVE MY INDIA.. . Ek Like tOh Banta hai LaDke par Girl : Aaj mere papa ne mujhe tumhare saath bikepar dekh liya... . . . . . . . Boy : Kya bole woh...??? . . . . . . . Girl : Jis baat ka dar tha woi hua, unhone mujhse bus kiraye ke liye paise le liye... humari family bohot strict hai na... =));p

Chalo aaj kuch toofani karte hain
.
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.

.
.
Girlfriend ko bolte hain recharge
karvane ko..,,
- UnitedDj.com

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Touching lines said by a boy
to a gal during break up:
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Behen gifts to wapis karti ja teri bhabi ko kya dunga..!!!!!
- UnitedDj.com

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2013 Ka 1 zabardast sawal...
Ek Shakhs Ne Apny Naukar Se Poocha K
Ghari Main Time Kya Hua Hai?
Naukar Ne Kaha:
Sui Sui K Ooper Hai.
Jitnay Bajne Waly Hain,
Utne Bajnay Main Utnay He Minutes Hain..
Batao Us Waqt Time Kya Ho Raha Tha...? ?
Challenge For You All..
- UnitedDj.com

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Friend:"mere paas gaadi hai,bangla hai, paisa
hai, tumhare paas kya hai.. ??
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Pappu:"abe mere pass girlfriend hai aur uske
baap ke paas 2 petrol pump hai...
- UnitedDj.com

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Ek tha Bhagwan..... Ek tha Shaitan.....
Dono me jab jhagda hua to bahut hua
Nuksaan.
Dono ne milkar samasya ka nikala ek
samadhan.
Ek khilona banaya aur uska naam
rakha INSAAN.
Shaitan ne apni taaqatein di..... Krodh,
Ghamand aur Jalan.
Bhagwan ne apne ansh diye..... Pyaar,
Daya aur Sammaan,
Bhagwan se muskurakar bola fir
shaitan.
Na tera Nuksaan..... Na mera Nuksaan.
Tu Jeetey ya Mein Jeetu,
HAAREGA INSAAN...
Aur isiliye kehte hai ...
Koi Toote To Use Sajana Seekho ...
Koi Roothe To Use Manana Seekho ...
Rishte To Milte Hain Mukaddar Se ...
Bas
Unhe Khoobsurti Se Nibhana sikho...
- UnitedDj.com

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Aaj jo bhi iss status ko pehle like karega
usse main page ka admin bana dunga.....
.
.
.
.
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.

.
For more jokes stay connected wid our
page...
- UnitedDj.com

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MBA to enginere stdnt: Tum uss ladki ko kabhi kiss nhi krr sakte....!!!
engg: nhi mai kr sakta huu
mba: to lagi 1000rs ki??
engg: haa theek hai

engg uss ladki se: mai aapko bina chhue kiss kr ke dikhaau?
ladki: nhi kr paaye to?
engg: mai aapko 500rs dunga
ladki: theek hai
engg ne ekdum tight hug deke lambi kis ki
ladki chillate hue: tumne cheating ke hai
engg: to roti kyu ho yeh le 500rs
phir engg ne mba se 1000rs le liye

Kuch bhi karo pr enginere se panga Mat Lo
- UnitedDj.com

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Ek Engineer 2 Cigarettes Pee RahaTha ........ . grl : 2 Cigarette Q Pee Rahe Ho ? . Engineer : Dost ki Yad Aa Rahi He, 1 Meri Or 1 Mere Dost ki... . . Kuch Din Baad Engineer 1 Cigarette Pee Raha Tha... . grl : Dost ko Bhool Gaye kYa? . Engineer : Nhi BewaKoof, Mene Cigarette Peena chor diYa H . Ab Sirf DosT ki Pee Rha Hu !!! Our parents believe that studying is so easy just like walking in a park... . . . . . . . . . . . . But only we knows that this park is JURASSIC park with a variety of DINASOURS Girlfriend khana khate hue:”ye tumhara kutta mujhe bahut der se ghoor q raha hai.. ?? . . . . . . Boyfriend:”tum jaldi se kha lo, . . . wo apni plate pehchan gaya hai… . . Swarg Me Gandhiji Se Chitrgupt Mile Tab, Gandhiji Ne Apne Dharti Ke Teen Bandro Ka Hal Puchha.. . Chitrgupt Bole:"Wo Teeno Bahut Maje Me Hai.. Jo ANDHA Tha, Wo To KANOON Ban GayaHai.. . Jo Bahra Tha Wo, SARKAR Ban Gaya Hai.. . Aur Jo GUNGA Tha Wo Sabse Mast Hai, Wo PRIME MINISTER Ban Gaya Hai... Biwi Market se Loti Pati: "Mera Andaza ye keh raha Hai Ki is Box Me Koi Khane Ki Cheez Hai.. . . . . . Patni:"Are wah mere Pati- Parmeshwar Aap Ne Bilkul Sahi Andaza Lagaya . . . . Is Me Mere Sandal Hai. Pappu Shocked... Biwi rocks.... Im irlfrnd-tumhar e papa kya karte hain? . . Boyfrnd- KFC ke maalik hain . . Girlfrnd- wow! So rich waise KFC ka matlab kya hai? . . . . . . . Boyfrnd- Kalu Fruit Chaat.. . Hahaha boyZ rocx How BEDROOM Smells After MARRIAGE: . . 1st 3 years ------ Perfumes, Flowers, Chocolate, Strawberry, Grapes. .. . . After 3 YRS------- Baby Powder, Johnsons Cream & Lotions, Baby oils · · After 15YRS-------ZanduBalm, Vicks, Iodex, Relispray…. · · After 40 YRS------- Agarbatti .. Agree ?? THOKO LYK SUNDAY ka matlab yeh toh nhi k sb fb se chutti kar lo....???? . Kahan ho fb ki soe hui AWAAM . Maine post kiya hai ab toh jag jao . Lazyness ki bhi haad hoti hai LETS START CHIT CHAT

Our parents believe that studying is so easy just like walking in a park... . . . . . . . . . . . . But only we knows that this park is JURASSIC park with a variety of DINASOURS Girlfriend khana khate hue:”ye tumhara kutta mujhe bahut der se ghoor q raha hai.. ?? . . . . . . Boyfriend:”tum jaldi se kha lo, . . . wo apni plate pehchan gaya hai…

Ladki mandir me:"Hey Bhagawan... Kisi samajhdar ladke ko mera boyfriend bana do.. . . . . . . . Bhagawan:"Ghar chali ja beti.. . . . . Samajhdar ladke kabhi girlfriend nahi banate... - UnitedDj.com Girl to hr Blind BF : Kash tum dehk saktey ke main kitni khubsurat hu.. . . . . BF: Itni khubsurat hoti toh kya Aankh wale Tujhe Mere liye chhod jaate.. . . Kamini andha hu bevkuf nahi.. - UnitedDj.com Raat ko padhte padhte.. ek khayal aaya mere bhai . . . . Pen uthaya aur paper Aur ek nyi equation banai .. . . Bed rajai = bhaad mein gyi padhai! Hahahaha - UnitedDj.com Girlfrend Romantic mood me- aaj ghar mai koi nhi hai, aajao.. . . . . Boy- tu mere ghar aaja pagli, mere ghar sab log hai Tera mann laga rahega Moral- har ladka kamina nahi hota koi sharif b hota hai - UnitedDj.com The most emotional moment ina boy's life, . . When a girl says, . "Can u give me ur number" . . . . Itni khushi.. Itni khushi.. - UnitedDj.com Maa-Nalayak Kaha Thi Itni Raat Tak? Beti-Boyfriend Ke Saath, Maa-Kar Aayi Na Muh Kala, Beti-Toh Kya Hua Maa Fair & Lovely Hai Na. . . - UnitedDj.com pehle wo meri GF thi Me bolta tha wo suni thi phir wo meri mangetar bani, Wo bolti thi main sunta tha jab wo meri BIWI bani Hum dono bolte he Mohalla sunta hai. - UnitedDj.com Girlfriend ne kiya kiss aur jal gye mere Lips. Girlfriend ne kiya kiss or jal gye mere Lips. Kyuki Vo kha kar ayi thi INDIAN "BINGO RED CHILLY CHIPS". - UnitedDj.com That awkward moment... . . Jab main kisi unknown larki se frndship krta hun... aur . . . aur kuch dino baad dekhta hu k hamare bich 10 mutual frnd ho gaya hai.... aur kamine sab mere dost hain - UnitedDj.com Mummy kehti hai : 'phone off kar, neend aa jayegi'... . . . . Ab . . unhe kaun samjhaye k bina phone ke neend nahi aati, neend aur udd jati hai.. - UnitedDj.com Agar 43 years Ka rahul Gandhi YUVA hai.. . . . . . TO is hisaaab se to hum to abhi paida bhi nahi huye yaar.. - UnitedDj.com IDBI-Itna Dhan Bina Income SBI-Sab Bhikari Idhar HDFC-Har Dum Fakir Chand HSBC-Hum Sabse Bade Chor Bank of Baroda-Bank Of Bhangis - UnitedDj.com Mom : dekhna bahar baarish ho rahi hai kya? . . . . . Me : checks facebook , . everybody updated . . awesome mausam raining . . haan maa , bht baarish ho rahi hai - UnitedDj.com Style of breaking up: Bf bought a rocket as a gift for his new gf. . . Gf-Wht d hell would i do with dis rocket..?? . . . . Bf-U want stars na? nw sit on it n get lost - UnitedDj.com

Old But Awesome.. 7 Saal k bhai se 5 Saal ki behan puchti hai.. . . What is love ?? . . . CUTE ANS Bhai:" Tum har roz mere bag se chocolate kha jati ho lekin mai fir bhi whi rkhta hu... . . That's love.. - UnitedDj.com Great advise for the Girls Jab bhi galiii me chalo nazrein Jukha ke chalo Kyu ki Aisa krne se naa sirf apki izzat barhe Gi balki. . . Gire hue paise milne ke chances bhi barh jayenge.. - UnitedDj.com Boy in a romantic mood - Aaj mausam kitna suhana hai.. Thandi hawa bhi hai..., Badal bhi hai aasmaan mein... Baarish bhi hone wali hai...... Tumhe kya lagta hai??? . . . . . . Girl (gusse mein) - Mujhe lagta hai aaj mera game bajnewala hai kaminey - UnitedDj.com Dear Boyz . . Shadi krni hai to apni gf se kro.. . . . Dusro ki Gf se to Ghrwale bhi kara dete hai.!! :- P - UnitedDj.com Facebook ek Mandir hai . Page ek Murti hai Status prasad hai . . Status Update karne wala Pujari hai . . Status padhne wala bhakt hai . . status padhke "LIKE" "comment" na kare .... Wo mandir k bahar baitha BIKHARI Hai - UnitedDj.com Fb pe girls 1000 ke note ki tarah hoti h... . . . . kyu ki . . Sala... Hamesha darr laga rhta h kahi farzi (fake) na ho... - UnitedDj.com Machli Jal Ki Raani Hai * * No No Somthng Should Be new . . Girl Friend Dil Ki Raani hai, Paisa Uska Paani hai, Haath Lagao Chilaayegi, . . Paise Nikaalo Pat Jaayegi...... . - UnitedDj.com Din Raat TV dekhne ki wajah se, . . Exam me fail Hone par, papa ne pappu ko . . sirf itna kaha ki.. . . . . . "BIG BOSS"chahte Hai ki Aap Ghar Se Dafa ho jaye... . - UnitedDj.com SOLID BEIZZATI..... ;D . . Ladki pic upload karke likhti hai : hii friendzz kesi lag rahi hoon..? . . . . . Boy : tere baap ne 15-20 hazar ka mob. Leke diya hai to ghar me 500rs ka sheesha bhi lagaya hoga.... Uss Mein dekh le,,...!!!....h umse kya poochti hai 'bhootni' kahi ki....;D ;D. - UnitedDj.com Super Insult- Maths Teacher: Jab Mai Tumhare Jitna tha, Mere 100 marks Aate the. . . Student: Aji Kismat Achi Thi Aapki Jo Aapko Acha Teacher Fas Gaya... Hamari Kismat Aisi Kahan - UnitedDj.com

Santa samundar me dahi dall raha tha banta ne pucha ye ka kar raha hai santa bola lassi bna raha hu banta ; ye kya pagalpan h teri ase harkaton ki vajah se hi log hum pr joke banate hai . Ab . . . . . Itni sari lassi kon peeyega - UnitedDj.com Boyfriend- Today I Am Tensed, Got Fired From Job, Got Disowned From Home, Mood Is Also Off. . . Girlfriend - Acha! Leave All That, Look Here!! ...... My New Chappals ! hahahahahaha girls are dumbooooo - UnitedDj.com Shortcut Proposal . . . . Pappu:" Kya mein Aapka Address Jaan Sakta Hun.. . . . . . . . . . Girl:" Wo q.. . . . . . . . . . . . Pappu:" wo Baraat Le ke Aani Thi.. . . - UnitedDj.com Samajhdar LIKE karenge baaki Baba Ramdev k Yoga K Karyakram dekhenge: . . . Girl: Agar mauka mila to tum mujhse shadi karoge…??. . . . . . . Boy: Agar mauka mil gaya to phir shadi karne ki kya zaroorat hai...! - UnitedDj.com GIRLS :- Mohabbat to kisi ek se karungi. . Ho sake, to kisi nek se karungi. . Lekin jab tak na milega, wo nek ladka.. . ... "TRY"to har ek ko karungi..: . Wah wah . . . . . Ab ise suno . . . . . Boys :- Arz kiya hai koi ladki hame thukra de to Gum nhi, . Koi Ladki hume thukra de to gum nhi, . . . Are uss ladki ki maa ki. kismat footi jiske damad hum nahi.... .??? - UnitedDj.com kafi time lagta hai ek shareef bande ko girlfrnd patane me.. . . . . . . . . Phir agar pat jaye toh.. kisi ka baap bhi use dobara shareef nahi bana sakta... .. Agree ?? - UnitedDj.com Mallika Sherawat ko Mixer chalate dekh, Naukar bola: Madam, aap juice bana rahi ho kya? . . . . . . . Mallika: Nahi re, 1-2 din ke hi kapde the, toh socha issi mein dho dalun! Husband : Aaj bahut dino baad tumhaari behen ghar aayi. Bahot accha laga. Wife: jeans pehen lo, pyjaame me tumhaari khushi saaf nazar aa rahi hai... - UnitedDj.com BACHHA GHAR SE MAAR KHA KE SCHOOL JAA RAHA THA . . KISI NE PUCHA- BETA PADTE HO?? . . . . . BACHHA- NAHI SCHOOL KI UNIFORM PEHEN KE TERE BAAP KI BAARAT ME JAA RAHA HU CHALEGA ? - UnitedDj.com Sir - Kaunsa Panchi sabse Tez udta hai? . . Papu - Hathi . . Sir - Nalayk,Tera Baap kya karta hai..? . . Papu - Chota Rajan ke Gang me shooter hai.. . . . . . . Sir - Shabashhhh.... "Hathi"sahi jawab hai.. - UnitedDj.com

Wife: Zara kitchen se namak lete aana.... . . Husband: Yahan toh koi namak nahin hai ! . . . Wife: Mujhe pata tha! Tum toh ho hi andhe! Kaamchor ho ! Bas bahane banate ho ! Tumhe nahin milega. . Issliye, pehle hi le aayi thi ! - Uniteddj.com What Is Another Painful Sentence Other Than ‘I Hate U’ ” ” ” ” ” ” ” I Finished Studying, u Finished? Hurts A Lot... - Uniteddj.com Kaash Facebook pe ek javascript:void(0); option"Add as Girl friend" . . . . . Saala propose karne ka panga hi khatam, ladki ne accept ker li to matlab maan gayi, nahi to fb pe konsi ladkiyon ki kami hai Nextttt... lolllzzz - Uniteddj.com Husband:" Hamari 10th Aniverasrypar Me Tumhe.. . . ANDAMAN NIKOBAR ISLAND Le Jaaunga . . . Wife:" Wow..Aur 25th Aniversary Par.. ?? . . . . Husband:" Tumhe Wapas Lene Aaunga.. - Uniteddj.com Air hostes to Pandit: Sir,kya lenge? . Pandit-Puri,sabji,khir aur laddu. . Air hostess-Sir,aapkingfisher k plane me baithe h, . . . Vijay malya k shraadh me nahi... - Uniteddj.com Papu 1 Kil0 Jalebi Khane K Baad Bola:"Bhaiya Thodi Cheeni Dio.. . . . . . DUKANDAR:"Cheen ­ ­i Kyu.. ?? . . . . . Papu:"Soch Raha HU, Khane K Baad Kuch Mitha Ho JAYE... - Uniteddj.com Teacher- Ladki aur ladke me kya fark hai? . . Chintu- Ladki 1saal me ek hi bachche ki maa ban sakti hai. . . But . . Ladke 1 saal me 365 bachon ke papa ban sakte hai...... Teachr shocks - Uniteddj.com

Bikhari: Are dkho, kisi ne meri cycle chura li ... Aur apni bike yaha chhod gaya., 2 Bikhari: Tu to sach mein lut gaya, . . . . . ye to petrol se chalti hai! - Uniteddj.com 2 Judwa Bachche... . . . 1st Hans ke Lot Pot ho raha tha... . . 2nd Udaas tha... . . Dad: Tum itna kyun Hans rahe ho... . . Son: Mummy ne itni thand mein... dono bar isi ko Nehla Diya.. haha - Uniteddj.com A Girl to recharge vala Girl - 10 Rs ka recharge kr do . . . . Recharge wala-Mam 10Rs mesirf 7 rs milenge . . . . . . . . . . Girl - Ok koi bat nhi 3 Rs.ki namkin de do !! - Uniteddj.com Teacher: Shaadi ke waqt DULHE ko akele ghode par kyu bithaya jata hai..? . . . . Student: Last warning di jati hai ki. . . . . Abhi bhi waqt he “Bhaag Jaa” - Uniteddj.com Kya time aa gaya hai.. Boys ke liye film bani to "Ek Tha Tiger" . . . . . . . . Girls ka number aaya to "Ek thi daayan" - Uniteddj.com

2 Judwa Bachche... . . . 1st Hans ke Lot Pot ho raha tha... . . 2nd Udaas tha... . . Dad: Tum itna kyun Hans rahe ho... . . Son: Mummy ne itni thand mein... dono bar isi ko Nehla Diya.. haha

Girl: Mere Birthday Par Mujhe Bahut Costly Gift Dena Boy: Ok.. . . . On The Birthday . . . Boy: Your Gift..! Girl: How Sweet Isme Kya Hai?? . . Boy: Petrol Me Tale Hue Pyaaj Ke Pakode...!! - www.uniteddj.com Girl:" Mai Tumhare liye Aag pechal sakti hoon, Naddi me kood sakti hoon.. . . Boy:" love u jaanu.. kya Tum mujhe Abhi Milne Aa sakti Ho ?? . . . . . Girl:" Pagal ho kya itni dhoop me... !) - www.uniteddj.com

Pappu SHRABI- Agr mere hath me SARKAR ho to me DESH ki takdir badal dunga...... WIFE- Haramkhor phle apna pajama to badal le, subah se meri SALVAR pehan k ghum raha hai...... hahahha - UNiteddj.com Indian wife Sanskaro wali hoti Hai.. Wo sabke samne apne pati ko . . . . . "Abey Gadhe" ya ''Oye Gadhe'' nahi Kehti.. . . Isliye wo short me kehti hai A.G./O.G. sunte ho ji... Hahaha - UNiteddj.com Thoda naughty ho jaaeyein....!! . . Game bahot simple hai..!! . Sabko bus apne se pehle jisne comment kiya hai uska naam ek movie ke sath likhna hai..!! ______ ke ghar me _____ . Eg....priya ke ghar me 3 idiots! rohit ke ghar me kabhi khushi kabhi gham..!! . Abuse n false language = BAN....!!!! . LETS START !! - UNiteddj.com Teacher: Apka Beta Fail Ho Gaya Hai Or Ap Ladu Khila Rahe Ho. . . . . . Neta Ji: 50 Bacho Ki Class Hai,Pass Sirf 5 Hueye Hai,Aur Fail 45 Majority To Mere Bete Ke Sath Hai Na.... - UNiteddj.com Ladki ki vidai ke time dulhe ka Mobile Baja.. . . Dulhan ne dulhe ko Kas ke Thappad Mara.. . . Pata hai Kyu....?? . kyu ki.... dulhe ki Mobile Ki Ringtone Thi... . . . Dil me apne armaan chhupa ke hum chale. aaj hum apni maut ka saman utha le chale.. - UNiteddj.com Inocent joke :- . . A child said to a pregnantlady Child :- Ye pait me kya hai ? . . Lady :- Isme mera pyara sa cute sa baby hai . . . . Child :- Itna pyara tha to khaya kyu moti :)) - UNiteddj.com Lipstick lagana Ladkiyon ki Beauty hai . . . . . Wah wah . . .wah wah . . Aur Use Taste krna uske BOY frnd Ki boht Bdi Duty hai - UNiteddj.com Kid 1:" Mere papa itne tall hain k jump maar ke Helicopter pakad lete hain.. . . . . . . Kid 2:" Mere papa bhi tall hain, Lekin woh aisi Chutiyaiyapanti nahi karte. - UNiteddj.com

Thappad marne par naraz biwi se Pati bola: Aadmi usi ko marta hai jis se Pyar karta hai. Biwi ne pati ko 2 thappad maare aur boli . . aap kya samjhte hain main aapse Pyar nahi karti...??? - Uniteddj.com a girl asked pappu:- girl- wo kya chiz hai jo cow ke paas 4 hai, aur mere paas 2 hai? pappu- legg (pair) . girl- wo kya chiz tumhare pait ke andar hai, aur mere salwar ke andar nahi hai? pappu- rupaaye . girl- wo kya hai jo aadmi din me lene ke bajay raat me bed par lete hai? pappu- neend . girl- wo kya hai jise ladkiya pahli baar karwate wakt pain ki vajah se roti hai? pappu- kaan me chhed. . moral:- aap bhi apni niyat pappu ki tarah saaf rakhe.... - Uniteddj.com hadi ke 7 sukh 1.subah subah garm pani milega (bartan dhone ke liye) 2. pyare pyare bche milenge (aapko gdha bnane ke liye) 3. har roz biwi aapse pyar se bolegi (rashan lane ke liye) 4. biwi aapki baho me bahe dalegi ( khrcha pani ke liye) 5. aap gana gana shuru kr doge (bacho ko sulane ke liye) 6. wo roj tyar hokar samne ayegi (shoping jaane ke liye) 7. aapko bi whisky ka maza ayega (kuch der gum bhulane ke liye) NO LIFE WITHOUT WIFE... - Uniteddj.com Pyar mein duniya khoobsurat lagti hai, Dard mein duniya dushman lagti hai, Aap jaise dost jindgi mein ho toh Paani ki boonde bhi hume "HAYWARDS 5000" lagti hain...:) - Uniteddj.com Best T-shirt Quote ever: . . . . "i don't need a girlfriend.. . . "my studies irritate me everyday.. that's enough" .. - Uniteddj.com She :- Tu Whatsapp Pe Hai Kya ? . . . Me :- Nahi, Sorry Main Whatsapp Pe Nahi Hu, Whatsapp Mere Phone Me Hai... - Uniteddj.com Bf to his gf-"Bewafa tune mera dil jala diya... dil jalakar rakh kar diya... Now gf-"Teri kurbani bekar nhi jyegi ..... bhej de rakh bartn mazne ke kaam ayegi....its jalim pj na??? - Uniteddj.com Drinkrs Gang- Aaj Tab Tak Piyenge Jab Tak Wo Samne K 3 Ped 6 Nahi Dikhte! Bar Owner- Bas Karo Kamino, Samne 1 Hi Ped He! Ab Kya Jungle Banaoge Kya!!! - Uniteddj.com

Santa jab bhi kapde dhota, baarish ho jaati... Ek din dhoop nikli... Usne bhagwan ka shukrya kiya aur dukaan se surf lene gaya... . . Tabhi achanak zor zor se badal garajney lagey... Santa fatafat aasman ki taraf muh kar ke bola... "kidhar..?? . . . . . . . . mai to biscuit lene aaya hu... - Uniteddj.com Teacher : Why did you laugh ?. Boy : I saw a strap of your bra. Teacher : Get out. No class for you for one week. Another boy laughs. Teacher : why did you laugh ?. Boy : I saw both straps. Teacher : Get out. No class for you for one month. She bends down to pick a chalk. Akpor started walking out of the class. Teacher : akpos! why are you walking out of my class ?. Akpos : With what i saw just now, i think my school days are over. - Uniteddj.com 18+ . . "Beta,Bade hokar kya banoge?" . . . . . "Bahot paise kamaaunga,Un paiso se AK-47 lunga aur aise question poochne wale uncles ki v gand par goli marunga"..=)) - Uniteddj.com Sunny Leon ne sabzi mandi me 2 feet lambi muli dekh ke puchha:" Bhaiya ji Yeh kya hai.. ?? . . . Sabziwala:" Yeh hamare liye toh MULI hai.. . . . Par aapke liye MAMULI hai.. samjh gye toh thoko like - Uniteddj.com Sher-Sherni ko Kiss kar raha tha... . . Sherni Use RoKk ke Idhar-Udhar Dekhne lagi... . Sher:-Kya hua..? Rukk kyu Gayi..? . . Sherni:-Dekh Rahi Hu Aas-Paas Discovery Channel Vale to Nahi hai... . . . . "Saale MMS Bana Dete Hai... - Uniteddj.com BEST MEMORIES:" Oye extra pen hai kya.. ?? . . Ek hi hai.. . . Haan de.! ek hi chahiye . . Kitno ne aesa kiya hai thoko Like.. pata to chale.. - Uniteddj.com

Me watching TV alone.!! . . . Ads: Cycle Agarbatti, Maggi, Noodles, Ultratech Cement, etc etc . . . . Suddenly Parents enter.!! . . . . Ads: Manforce Condoms, Whisper Choice, Set Wet very very sexy etc etc .. - Uniteddj.com 10th Calss Ke Exams Chal Rahe The, Paper Bhi Hard Tha Aur Examiner Bhi Bahut Hi Strict Tha. . Cheating Karne Ka Koi Bhi Moka Nahi De Raha Tha, . Bar-Bar Round Pe Round Laga Raha Tha. Achanak Pappu Ne Ek Chit Likh Kar Examiner Ko Di. Examiner Chup-Chap Ja Ke Apni Chair Pe Beth Gaya, . Aur Exam Ke End Tak Utha Hi Nahi. . Exam Khatam Hote Hi Sari Class Pappu Ke Paas Aa Gayi Aur Puchha: “Abe Kamal Kar Diya, Tune Esa Chit Pe Kya Likha Tha?” Pappu Haste Hue Bola :- “Bas Yahi Ki Sir, Pichhe Se Aapki Pant Phati Hui Hai“ Hahaha - Uniteddj.com

Aunty: Kya karte ho? . Me: Engineering. Aunty: suna hai aaj kal scope kam hai, job mili? . . * Tell me, what to do with the dead body now? - Uniteddj.com ] GAME yeh Hai Ladko Ko Hollywood Movie Ke Naam Likhne Hai Aur . Ladkiyo Ko Bollywood Movie Ke Naam Likhne Hai . Jiske Comment Zyada Hoge Wo Winner Hoga . Note= Ek Comment mein sirf Ek Movie Name..!! Letz see who vl win.... - Uniteddj.com Girl:" Jaanu ab tum change ho gaye ho.. . . Pappu:" Wo kyun.. ?? . . Girl:" Ab main tumhe KISS karti hu to tum Eyes Close Nahi Karti.. . . , Pappu:" Haramkhor, Kamini, Pichli Baar Close ki thi to Mere Purse se 100 Rs. Gayab The. - Uniteddj.com Genius Pappu History Ki Teacher Ne Pappu Ko Khada Kiya Aur Sawal Puchha . . . Teacher: “Batao Ganga Kahan Se Nikalti Hai Aur Kaha Ja Ke Milti Hai?” . . . Pappu: “Madam, Ganga School Ke Bahane Ghar Se Nikalti Hai Aur Mandir Ke Piche Vivek Se Jaakar Milti Hai.” - Uniteddj.com ਕੁੜੀ ਕਮਰੇ ਚ ਕਲੀ ਬਹਿ ਕੇ ਰੋ ਰਹੀ ਸੀ " . . . ਉਸਦੀ ਬੇਬੇ ਆਈ ਤੇ ਪੁਛਦੀ " ਕੀ ਹੋਈਆ ? . . ਕੁੜੀ " ਕੁਝ ਨਹੀ . . . ਬੇਬੇ " ਮੈ ਤੇਰੀ ਸਹੇਲੀ ਵਰਗੀ ਏ ਮੈਨੂੰ ਦੱਸ ਕੀ ਹੋਈਆ ? . ਕੁੜੀ " ਯਾਰ ਕੀ ਦੱਸਾ ਮੈ ਆਪਣੇ ਆਲੇ ਨਾਲ ਫਿਲਮ ਵੇਖਣ ਗਈ ਸੀ ਤੇਰੇ ਆਲੇ ਨੇ ਵੇਖ ਲਿਆ , ਹੁਣ ਆ ਕੇ ਬਹੁਤ ਕੁਟੂਗਾ " . . . . . . Hehehehe - Uniteddj.com 2 boy follow 2 girl . . . . 2no Ladkiya rakhi shop pr jati h aur 2 rakhi le kr un dono ladko ko bhandh deti h. . . . . . . 2no ladke ek dusre ki taraf dekh kar khte h, Ki koi baat nhi- . . Tu meri wali se shadi kar le, me teri wali se - Uniteddj.com Change in a mother's attitude... 5 Year old boy:" I love u mom Mom:" A wwww.. I love u too . . . . 15 Year old boy:" I love u mom Mom:" sorry, I have no money . . . . 20 Year old boy:" I love u mom . . Mom:" kaun hai ?? kaha rehti hai wo kamini ?? Hahaha Agree ?? - Uniteddj.com boy i love you... √ √ Girl:ghanta... √ √ Boy :i will die 4u... √ √ Girl:ghanta.. √ √ .Boy:i cant live without u... √ √ Girl: ghanta... √ √ Boy:i will give u diamond ring... √ √ Girl:really... √ √ Boy: ghanta..... hahahaha - Uniteddj.com Birthday Koi Wish Nahi Karta, ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ Par... Result Ke Time Pe Dada Ki Mausi Ki Beti Ke... Husband Ki Behan Ka Phone Aa Jata Hai..!!! - Uniteddj.com

Boys rule . Dhokha milta h jab pyaar me, . . zindgi me udasi chha jati h, . . sochte h chod denge is duniya ko . . . kambhakt phir dusri pasand aa jati hai .. - Unitreddj.com In A Nursery School Canteen, . . There Was A Basket Of Apples With A Notice Written Over It: ''Do Not Take More Than One, God Is Watching'' . . On The Other Counter There Was A Box Of Chocolates, . . A Small Child Went & Wrote On It . "Take As Many As You Want, God Is Busy Watching The Apples".. - Unitreddj.com hen a women says- What...? It not becoz she did not hear's u. It means..; "she's giving a chance to change ur words..... what u said. Ri8 girlzzz.... - Unitreddj.com Dimag ka Dahi wala JoKe . . . Santa ke lips jale hue the . . Banta: Kaise jale . . Santa: Wife ko railway station drop krne gaya tha. . . Banta: To? . . Santa: Khushi ke mare.Train ke engine ko choom liya - Unitreddj.com

Boy : What is 143 . Girl : i love you Boy : no . Girl : i miss you Boy : no . Girl : i need you Boy : no . Girl : i kill you Boy : no . Girl : phir kya hai ? . . . . Boy : one hundred & forty three pehle jaa k numbers sikle gawar - Uniteddj.com Girlfriend ko palko par bitha lo . . Deke khushi uske saare gum chura lo . . . pyar karo uski saheli ke samne itna ki . . . . uski saheli bhi kahe janu mujhe bhi pata lo Hahahaha boys thoko like - Uniteddj.com Teacher:" Galti hone pe maafi magne wale ko kya kahte hai..?? Student:" Samajhdar . . Teacher:" Aur galti na hone pe bhi mafi mangne waale ko kya kahte hai ?? . . . . Student:" BOYFRIEND.. - Uniteddj.com TIME 8:25 PM ^-^) FB ki bhatki aatmao aa jao .. jo bore ho gye hai inbox khali kro or yha aa jao ^-^) LETS START CHIT CHAT ♥♥ ^-^) =)) Abuse /Misbehave / Dirty Language R.I.P. In Ban List..!!- Uniteddj.com Ek auto rickshaw me couple kiss kar rhe the... Driver unhe dekh raha tha . . . Aage jaake accident hua . . Toh... . Driver sar pakad kar baitha aur bola:- . . . saala ab samjhaa Titanic kyu dooba tha:P - Uniteddj.com

GirL A.T.M pe Pappu se.. Girl : bhaiya mujhe apna balance check krna h.. Ap meri help kr do.. . . Pappu ne use ek zor ki laat marta h or ladki gir jati h. . . . . . Pappu : tera balance to bahot kharab hai Ladkiyo me aur Pepsi me kya similarity hai.?? . . . . . . Answer: "Both are Cool, Sweet and Sab pasand karte hain - Aur most important similarity is,, Dimag wali jagah dhakkan hai Agree Boys ?? - Uniteddj.com Pappu shirt utar ke balcony me khada ta...!! 1 admi - wah Pappu ji kya Mast chest hai.. ... . . Pappu : - are ye kuch bi nai, . . . teri bhabi ki dekhenga to hil jaaega - Uniteddj.com Main Cigarate Kabhi Nhi Pita.. Woh To Bas! Jab Ghum mein Hota Hu To Ghum Bhulane K Liye.. Jab Khush Hota Hu To maza double Krny K Liye.. Jab Akela Hota Hu To Tanhai Dur KarneK Liye.. Jab Dosto K Sath Hota Hu To UnKa Sath Dene K Liye.. Jab Bhukha Hota Hu To Bhukh Mitane K Liye.. Or Jab Khana Kha Leta Hoon To Khana Hazam Karne K Lye.. Jb free Hota Hu To Time Pas K Liye.. Warna Me Itna Pagal Nahi K Cigeratte Jesi Chez Ko Haath Lagaon Or koi hai kya mere jaisa? - Uniteddj.com School bus mein driver k peeche betha Pappu khud se batain kar raha tha... . . agar meri maa haathni aur baap hathi hota to main ek chota hathi hota..hahaha.. . . agar maa chirya aur baap chira hota to main 1 chira hota...hahaha... . . agar maa sherni aur baap sher hota to main chota sher hota...Hahaha... . . . . Driver ko gussa aa gaya:" aur bola agar teri maa kamini aur baap kanjar hota to tu kia hota.... ?? Pappu:" phir main bus driver hota... - Uniteddj.com

Girl:" Mujhe is tarah se propose karo ki kisi ne nahi kiya ho.. . . Boy:" (slapped the girl) kamini, i love u . . . Kutti, Saali, Shaadi karle mujhse aur tabah karde Mujhe. - Uniteddj.com Girl To Boy:" Jannu Koi Aisi Baat Kaho, Jis me Dukh Bhi Ho aur Khushi Bhi.. . . . . . . . . Boy:" You r so beautiful aunty ji... :-):-D - Uniteddj.com Ek murgi ne INDIA-CHINA border par anda diya.. . . Dono desh ek ande ke liye ladne lage Aakhir faisla ye hua ki. . . Jo desh dusre desh ki jyada ladkiyo ko kiss karega.Anda uska.. . . Indian CHINA gaye or . . 20,000 ladkiyo ko kiss kiya.. . . CHINA wale excited ho ke:- ab hamari baari.. . . Indian:- chal yaar anda Tu hi rakh le.. - Uniteddj.com

Boy Teasing A Girl : Ae Chalti Kya? . . Girl : Kaha? . . Boy : Wherever You Say... . . Girl : Ok Lets Go Shopping . . . . . . . . Boy : Kasam Se Didi Aapke Saath To Na Mazak Karna Bhi Gunaah Hai. - Uniteddj.com Faadu Santa Doctor: Tumhare Kaan Kaise Jale? . . Santa: Main Kameez Istari Kar Raha Tha, Ke Phone Aa Gaya. Maine Jaldi Mein Phone Ki Jagah Istari Kaan Ko Laga Li . . . Doctor: To Doosra Kaan Kaise Jala? . Santa: Ab Ambulance Ko Bhi Phone Karna Tha Na... - Uniteddj.com Papu ki pass hone dard bhari dastan suno dosto Ishq k school me naya mahol taiyar ho gaya Papu ki gf se sbko pyar ho gaya Is se bechara hamara papu bhut udas ho gaya .Bas phr kya tha . . . Sari class fail or hamara papu pheli bar pass ho gaya Are ab papu k pass hone ki khusi me ek like toh banta h na - Uniteddj.com Twinkle Twinkle little star, . . teri girl friend gayi bazar, . . us ko mil gaya MAJNU ka pyar, . . ab tu beth ker makhiyan maaar ... - Uniteddj.com

Boy n girl chating on facebook... . . Girl- din bhar facebook pe online rehta hai chutiya hai kya ? Boy- tu hogi chutiyaa...tera-pura khandan chutiya..aur fb tere baap ka hai kya ???? . . Girl (after 3-4 minutes) - i was asking about your holidays... - Uniteddj.com Classical insult.. . . Girl:" meri 1-1 saans pe 1-1 ladka marta hai.. . . . . Boy:" to tum koi accha sa tooth paste istimaal kyo nahi karti..? - Uniteddj.com Machchar Ne Ek Aadmi Ko Din Me Kata... . Aadmi:" Ab Din Mein Bhi ??? . . Machchar:" Kya Karu bhai, Ghar Mein Maa- Baap Bimar Hai... Behen Jawan Hai Aur Ladke Walo Ne 1 Ltr Khoon Dahej Mein Manga Hai... - Uniteddj.com Pappu impressing his GF ... ....... Pappu: Mere baap k aage bade bade log katori leke khade hote hai...! . . GF: Achaa!!? kaun hai tumhara baap ? . . . Pappu: Pani puri wala ... Ladki Pic Upload Karke Likhti Hai : Hii Friendzz Kesi Lag Rahi Hoon..? . . . . Boy : Tere Baap Ne 15-20 Hazaar Ka Mobile Leke Diya Hai To Ghar Me 500 Rs. Ka Sheesha Bhi Lagaya Hoga.... Uss Mein Dekh Le, Humse Kya Poochhti Hai 'Bhootni' Kahi Ki. - Uniteddj.com Santa Jyotishi ke paas kundli dikhane gaya: Jyotish:" Tera naam Santa hai ?? Santa:" Ji Jyotish:" Teri biwi ka naam dolli hai ?? Santa:" ji Jyotish:" teri 2 beti hain ?? Santa:" ji haa.. . Jyotish:" tune abi 10 kg chawal kharide hain ??v . . Santa:" aap to antaryami hain maharaj.. Jyotish:" dafa ho jao yaha se.. Agli dafa kundli lana, ration card nahin..." - Uniteddj.com

Ek din ek ladka apne dost se bola:" University se mera result check kar ke aa ke batao..!! . . Magar yaad rahe, mere saath abba hongey! Agar main ek subject me fail ho gaya to kehna ke:" ek momin ki taraf se salaam.. . . . Agar 2 mein fail ho gaya to kehna ke:" 2 musalmaan bhaiyon k taraf se salam! . . . . Dost university se result dekh ke aaya or bola.. . . . . Tamaam Ummat-e-muslimeen O Muslimaat ki taraf se salaam... .. Hahahaha - Uniteddj.com Zindgi k 5 sach... Rach no 1:" maa k siwa koi wafadar nhi . . Sach no. 2:" gareeb ka koi dost nahi . sach no. 3:" log acchi seerat ko nahi achi surat ko tarjeeh dete hai . Sach no 4:" izzat sirf paise ki hai insaan ki nahi . Sach no 5:" insaan jis shakhsk liye dil se mukhlish ho wo hi shakhs dukh dard deta hai.. - Uniteddj.com New Teacher, 1st day sab students ka intro lete huye. . . all students tell ur name& hobbies . . 1st Boys : I'am santa, my hobby is watching bubble in bathtub. . . 2nd Boy : I'am banta, my hobby is too watching bubble in bathtub. . . 3rd Boy : I'am pappu, my hobby is also to watching bubble in bathtub. . Teacher: oh all boys have same hobbies. ok, now girls..... . . 1st Girl : my name is Bubble...:- P Jis Jis k samajh me aaya - Uniteddj.com New Generation.. . 1 Aurat Ne 5 Saal Ke Bachche Ko Cigratte Peete Dekha To Bachche Se Kaha: . " Kya Tumhare Parents Ko Maloom Hai Ki Tum Cigratte Peete Ho ?? . . . . . BACHHA:" Dhuwan Chhodte Hue,,, . . . Mohtarma ! Kya Aapke Shohar Ko Maloom Hai Ki Aap Ek Gair MARD Se Baate Kar Rahi Hai...???. . Bachha Rocked Aunty Shocked - Uniteddj.com

Pappu ko scooty chalate huye dekh kr uske dost ne pucha . . . . . . Dost ( pappu se):" ye scooty kab li?? . Pappu:" Kal raat 1 ladki mujhe scooty par bitha kar bahut door legayi or . . sare kapde utar ke boli:" Jo chahiye le lo . . Mein scooty le ke aaya, kapdo ka kya karta yaar...??? - Uniteddj.com Agar koi Ladki make-up kr k, Sajdhaj kr, new dress pehan kar shaadi, party, ya kisi function me ja rahi ho . . Toh samajh lo . . Nxt day ya to uski profile pic change hogi ya . relationship status.. - Uniteddj.com

Purani kahawat hai-- - ki sote waqt tenshion ke saath nahi sona chahiye.... .. .. .. . .. .. .. Phir b log apni wife ke saath kyun sote hai.... isliye ab so jaao sab. - Uniteddj.com Girl; Tum Mere Liye Kya Kar Sakte Ho . . . Boy; Bolo Kya Karna Hai . . . Girl ; Chand Todkr La Sakte Ho kya ? . . . . . Boy ; Fir EID Kya Tere Baap K Takle Ko Dekhkar Manaenge - Uniteddj.com Funny moments of the students.. . . During exam:" . . Yeh bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . . . In Result:" yeh kyaa ho gaya... - Uniteddj.com

When I was Studying My Mom Was calling me.. . . . But I did not respond.. I was deeply involved in Studies But she Called me again n again.. . . I shouted Plz Leave me to Study , My exam is near plz I want to Study , I want to Study My Mom Slapped me and said Stop Dreaming "Wakeup n Study.. :@ ;( - Uniteddj.com Girl in shop: "Bhaiya koi valentine card hai Jisme likha ho.. "Tum hi mera pehla aur akhri pyar ho" . . . shopkeper:"Haan hai.. . . . . . . Girl:"theek hai jaldi se "9"de do..:)) - Uniteddj.com Ek ladki COKE pi rahi thi, achanak us me se 1 MACHHAR nikla Macchar bola : MAA Ladki: Mein teri maa nahi hu. Machhar: Aisa na bol maa, mein teri COKE se nikla hoon.. - Uniteddj.com

Jiss marji ladke se pucho lo aap Wo single he kehega.. . . . Aur jiss marji ladki se puchlo wo kehegi i have bf . . Mujhe to yeh samaj nai aa raha k . . . Agar sare boys single hai to ladkiya kya bandro se set hone lag gyi ?? Ladki Se Police Ne Poocha: Tum Ne car se 50 Aadmi Q Maare...?? . . Ladki: Ji Main 60 Ki Speed Se Car Chala Rahi Thi, Achanak Pata Laga K Break Kaam Nahi Kar Rahi.............. Ab Mere Ek Taraf 2 Aadmi Ja Rahe The Or Ek Taraf Baraat, Mai Kise Maarti...?? . . Police: 2 Aadmiyon Ko Maarti,TaaKi Nuksan Kam Hota . . LARKI: Ji MeinE ne bhi ye hi Kiya Tha, . . . Per Ek Aadmi to niche aa gaya aur dusra Baraat Ki Taraf Bhaaga to kya krti.. 1000 pages ki book kitne din me padhi ja sakti hai, . . WRITER:" 6 months.. . . DOCTOR:" 2 months.. . LAWYER:" 1 month.. . . Engineer student:" ye batao exam kab hai.. raat bhar mein nipta denge.. - Uniteddj.com Jab class hum boys hasi - majaak kare tab hamare sir ka reaction . . "kya hai..kyun itni jyaadahasi aa rahi hai... koi joke yad aa gaya kya..?? GET OUT tumhari attendance nahi lagegi" :? . . Aur jab LADKIYA hass rahi ho tab:"Arey wah kya baate ho rahi hain aaj....?? kyun itna hass rahi ho...?? Zara humein bhi toh bataiye.. - Uniteddj.com Ek Aurat hath mai Hathoda le k apne Bete k college gai aur boli, "Kahna hai mere Bete ki class?" Principal: "Bhenji, shanti Rakhe, baat kya hai?" Aurat: "Aaj 5 din ho gaye mere Bete ki 5 chaddiyan phat gyi h.. . . . Aaj to main us ki . . Bench ki Keel thok k hi jauangi" - Uniteddj.com

25 Saal Ho Gaye Pr, Abhi Tak 3 Cheeze Bilkul Nhi Badli ! . . Parle-G Biscuit Wala ladka abhi tak bada nahi... Amul butter wali ladki abhi tak badi nahi huhi or MDH masala wala Buddha ab tak mara ni..! - Uniteddj.com Once Rajnikant forgot his toys in America when he was small ... . . . . Now that place is known as "Disney Land" Solid dhamki by papu to santa Tufano se pange lena par mujhse nahi Tufano se pange lena par mujhse nahi .Kyuki . . Jin tufano me akshar logo k ghar udh jaya karte hai un tufano me main apni chaddi sukhaya krta hu Bjao taliya papu k lye - Uniteddj.com In india.. on a bus stand... at a book stall.. : : an american engineer got heart attack.. : becoz.. : : : : he saw a book : "how to become an engineer in 15 days" worth rs. 15.. - Uniteddj.com Nobody in the world can stop u from falling in love.... . . But...??? 2 Powerful weapons can do that.. . . Mummy's Chappal Daddy's Belt Exclusively Made in India.. - Uniteddj.com He : Hi , what's your name? . . She : Asha . . He : But you're not small . . She : what? . . . He : Dil hai chota sa , choti si asha !! *Blocked* - Uniteddj.com

The pain of missing friends is realized whn . . . . . . . . . U r standing some where nd see a group of friends having fun U smile nd say to urself 'HUM BHI KABHI AISE HI KRTE THE' agree frnds ab ek like un bite lamho k lye toh banta h boss ... - Uniteddj.com Sir:" Akbar kaun tha ?? . . Pappu:" Pata nahin.. . . SIR:" Padhai ki taraf dhyan do.. . . . . Pappu:" Sir, Love, Pankaj, Avinash, kaun hai ?? . . SIR:" Pata nahi.. . . . . Pappu:" Apni beti ki taraf dhyan dijiye.. Teacher Shocked... Pappu Rocked.. - Uniteddj.com Pappu apne baap k samne cigrate pee rha tha . Mummy- nalayak ! Papa k samne cigrate pee rha hai ? . . . . . . . . . Pappu - to phir kya ho gya , Baapu hi hai na . koi Petrol pump to nahi jo aag lag jayegi... - UnitedDj.com G.f - kya bat h aj kal meri yad ni ati.. . . . . . . . . . . . B.f - jb se fb chalana suru kiya ,rat ki khayi hui sbzi yad ni rhti ,tu kya ghanta yad rhegi.. - Uniteddj.com BRAIN BUSTER.. . . If You Think You Know English Better, .. Here Is Your Test.. . . Apart From " BREAK " Write Any Other English Word That Starts With 'B' And Ends With 'K'.. .. Warning ! : DO NOT USE DICTIONARY.. .. Your Time Starts NOW !! - Uniteddj.com Husband (jalane k liye) . . . Kal mere khawab me ek larki aai thi, Wah kya larki thi . . Wife: “Akeli aayi hogi.?? . . Husband: “Tum ko kaise pata.?? . . Wife: “Uska husband mere khwabme aaya tha . . Husband Shocked Wife Rockedv:)

Ladki apne Boyfriend ko naraz karne ke baad, SMS pe kaise manati hai.. . . 1st Hour:" Sorry 2nd Hour:" Sorry plzz.. 3rd Hour:" Plzz 1 baar baat karlo.. 4th Hour:" Plzz reply jaan… 5th Hour:" Plzzz itna naraz mat ho.. 6th Hour:" I’m sorry, I’ll die agar tumne baat nahi ki.. 7th Hour:" Dafa ho, 100 ladke ghumte hai tere jaise..Sar pe hi chadha jaa rha hai,bhaad me jaa..v .. Boy:" Sorry Dear, balance nahi tha.. .. Girl:" Ohh.. Its okkk love u jaan.. - Uniteddj.com

Pappu chemist ki shop pe 1 bottle le k gaya aur ek chamach liquid dukandaar ko pila k bola:- mitha hai Kya? . . Dukandar bola- nahi, kyu kya h ye? . . . Pappu : - docter ne Bola chemist ki shop se 'urine' me sugar check karwa k aao...! Wo check krwane aya tha. - Uniteddj.com

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Pappu China Ke Tour Pe GayaTha Waha Usne Ek X-Ray Chashma Liya.. . Chashma Lagane Se Har Koi Nanga Nazar Aata Tha, . Pappu Ghar Aaya To Preeto Ko Apne Ek Dost Ke Sath Apne Bed Pe Nanga Dekha, . . Usne Foran Chashme Ko Utara, Phir Bhi Dono Nange Nazar Aaye, . pappu Gusse Se Chashma Fenkta Hua Bola: “Ye Hi Musibat Hai China Ke Saman Ki, Koi Garranty Nahi Hoti Jaldi Kharab Ho Jati Hai“ - Uniteddj.com

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Ek Student Ko Apni Life Mein, Khud Par Sabse Zyada Proud Kab Hota Hai ? . . Jab Usko Exam Mein Kuch Na Aata Ho, Aur Pichhe Se Teacher Aake Kahe,v ? ? Copy Chhupa Lo Pichhe Wala Dekh Raha Hai.... .. Kasam se Seena Kushi se Chauda Ho Jaata Hai..... - Uniteddj.com

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GF- Tumhe Meri Yaad Aati Hai To Kya Karte Ho ?? . . . BF - Main Tumhari Pasand Ki Chocolate Kha Letaa Hu.. . Aur Tum Kya Karti Ho ??? . . . . . . GF - Main Bhi Ek Gold Flake Pee Leti Hu... - Uniteddj.com

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Facebook Pe Kisi Ladki ko Hello Hi..Karne Se Accha.. . . . . . . . Kisi Kutte Ko Patthar Maar lo... .. Atleast Dhang Se Reply To Karta Hai.!! - Uniteddj.com

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18 Year Old Boy : Will You Be My GF...??? . 18 Year Old Girl : No, Get Lost... . . 5 Year Old Boy : Will You Be My GF...??? . 18 Year Old Girl : Awwwwwww So Sweet... Yes Yes, I Will... . . Hey Bhagwan,v Jiske Muh Me Daant Nahi Usiko Khana Kyo Dete Ho...... - UnitedDj.com

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Boss- Mere liye ak shisha lekar aao jisme main apna muh dekh sakun.. . . Santa- nahi mila sir.! Sab me mera hi muh dikh raha hai.. .. Inteligent Santa - UnitedDj.com

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1 train me Aishwarya without ticket travel kr rahi thi.. . Usne saree pehni thi.. T.T. Ne usse 100 rs fine liye.. & Katrina ne jeans pehni thi, usse 75 rs fine liye.. . & . Karina ne skirt pehni thi, usse 50 rs fine liye.. . . Par Sunny Leone se kuch nai liya.. . Why.. ?? . . socho . . Kyoki .. Uske pas ticket tha ..... - Uniteddj.com

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The fast and furious moment of childhood... . . . . When guests go out of the house And u run like a rocket to eat the things that served for them... - UnitedDj.com

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Dadaji: Beta zara mere daant lana . Pota: Lekin abhi roti to paki nahi hai . . . . . Dadaji: Abe, Roti ko mar goli samne wali budiya smile de rahi hai - Uniteddj.com

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Dimag ka Dahi wala JoKe . . . santa Nepali Se - Tum American Ho? .. .. .. Nepali- Nahi Me Nepal Ka H . santa- Nahi Tum Amrican Ho . . Nepali- Nahi Bhai Main Nepal Ka Hu.. . . santa- Nahi Tum Amrican Ho . . Nepali (Gusse Me)- Ha Me American hu... . . santa- Lagte To Nepali Ho - Uniteddj.com

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To all girls who die for 'size zero' & to all boys who wanna such a girl as a Gf : . . . 'Real man” goes for curves.. Haddiyo pe to kutte marte hai..! - Uniteddj.com

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Sunny Deol ke "GADAR-2" banaane ke announcement ke baad ......... Pakistan ne . . . . apne sabhi Handpumps ki suraksha badha di hai - UNiteddj.com

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Husband- Agar mujhe lottery lagi toh tum kya karogi...? : : : Wife- Aadhe paise le kar Hamesha keliye mayke chali jaungi... Main bhi khush aur aap bhi khush.. : : : Husband- 20 Rs. ki lagi hai... ye le 10 aur nikal.. - UNIteddj.com

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Pappu: “Pichhle Hafte Meri Aur Meri Girlfriend Ki Ladai Ho Gayi Thi Aur Hum Alag Ho Gaye” . Golu: “Phir?” . Pappu: “Usne Mujhe Chidhane Ke Liye Apne Naye Boyfriend Ke Sath Photo Khinchva Ke Mujhe Bhej Di”:( . Golu: “Ohh, Ye To Bahot BuraKiya Usne” . Pappu: “To Main Bhi Konsa Kam Hu, Utha Ke Photo Uske Baap Ko Bhej Di...!!!! ... lele abmaze - UnitedDj.com

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Gabbar: Kitne Admi the? Sambha: Sarkar 2.. .. Gabbar: Mujhe ginti nahi ati, 2 kitne hote hai?? Sambha: 2 1 ke Baad aata hai. .. Gabbr: aur 2 k pehle?? Sambha: 2 k pehle 1 aata hai. .. Gabbar: To beech me kaun aata hai? Sambha: Beech mein koi nahi aata. .. Gabbar: To fir Dono ek sath kyu nahi aate? Sambha: 2 1 k baad hi aa sakta he kyuki 2 1 se bada hai. .. Gabbar: 2 1 se Kitna bada hai? Samba: Abey Goli marni hai toh mar de, tera namak khaya hai, CHAVANPRASH nahi.. - Uniteddj.com

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Latest Double Meaning Jokes of 2013 (For Read Click on Link ) - Uniteddj.com

Latest Double Meaning Jokes of 2013

Dirty and Adult jokes of 2013 Latest (For Reading the Jokes Click on link ) - Uniteddj.com

Latest Dirty and Adult Jokes of 2013

Kaminapan bhi jaroori hai. .. . . Boy:" hey, i love u, meri gf banogi.. ?? . . . Grl:" hmmmm! Apna numbr de do, . . jab current bf se break-up hoga to miss call kar dungi.. - uniteddj.com

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" Pappu " ਜੋਕੀ ਦਾ underwear ਲਿਆਇਆ " " ਤੇ ਸਾਰੇ ਪਿੰਡ ਵਿਚ ਆਪਣੀ ਧੋਤੀ ਚਕ ਚਕ ਕੇ ਵਿਖਾਵੇ " " " ਘਰ ਆਇਆ ਤੇ ਅਲਮਾਰੀ ਖੋਲੀ " ਤੇ ਬੇਹੋਸ਼ ਹੋਗਿਆ " " ਕਿਓਕੀ " " " " " " " " underwear ਅਲਮਾਰੀ ਵਿਚ ਹੀ ਰਿਹ ਗਿਆ ਸੀ " __ - Uniteddj.com

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PM to Secretary:" Jab se me PM Bana Hu Meri Maa ko Hichki BahutAati Hai.. . . . . Secretary:" Actualy Sir, . . . Petrol ke daam badhne se Log Aapki Maa Ko Bahut Yaad Karte Hai... Hahahhaha ,,,,, - UNiteddj.com

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ਉਹ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਮੇਨੂੰ ਤਾ Honey Singh ਵਦੀਆਂ ਲਗਦਾਂ! ਮੈ ਕਿਹਾ ਔਹ ਤਾ ਤੈਨੂੰ ਵਦੀਆਂ ਲਗਣਾ ਹੀ ਆਂ ਤੇਰੀ ਮਾਂ ਭੈਣ ਜੋ ਇਕ ਕਰਦਾ,,,, - Uniteddj.com

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Latest Dirty And Adult Jokes of 2013 (for Read the Jokes click on link ))

Dirty and Adlut JOkes of 2013

Best profession. .. Shadi Me Photografer Banne Ka Kuch Aur Hi Maza Hai, Ladkiyan:: Meri Lo Na, Meri Akeli Ki Lo, Ye Meri Frnd Hai, Hum Dono Ki Sath Me Lo. Khade Khade Lena. - Uniteddj.com

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Ladki Ki Shaadi Me Uska Puraana BOYFRIEND Bhi Aaya Tha ...... . . . Sabhi Ne Us Se Poochha: Kya Aap Hi Dulhe Ho........... . . . . . . Boyfriend : Nahi Main To Semi Final Mein OUT Ho Gaya tha.. . . . Final Dekhne Aaya Hu - Uniteddj.com

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Ek chuha sharab k drum me gir gaya, . . . . . bahar nikal kar mast hokar sath mai soye hui Billi ki puchh pe pao rakh kr bola:" . . . . . UTH MUNNI, CHULBUL PANDEY TERA DANCE DEKHNE AAYA HAI" - Uniteddj.com

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Hubby Ke B'day Par Wife Ne Pucha:" Kya Gift Dun ??? . . Hubby:" Tum mujhe Pyar Karo , Izzat Karo aur Mera Kehna Maano... Yahi kaafi hai...!! . . . . . Wife:" (Kuch Der Soch Ke) Nahi Main To Gift Hi Dungi.. - Uniteddj.com

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Engineering student sitting with his Girlfrnd in Restaurant Drinking BEER and says:" I Love yOuuu Girlfrnd:" is it yOu Or the BEER talking ?? . . . . Student:" its me, Talking tO my BEER, yOu Shut up.. - Uniteddj.com

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Ek Bhikhari: "Arey yaar ! Koi meri CYCLE chura le gaya aur apni BIKE yahan rakh gaya.......... . . Dusra Bhikhari:" Abe tu to Loott gaya yaar ! . . . Ye to PETROL se chalti hai.. - uniteddj.com

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Truth... Ladkiyo ki Shakal itni buri nahi hoti jitni unke Voter-Id-Card me hoti hai.. . . . . . . . . Aur itni sunder bhi nahi hoti jitni Facebook ki profile me hoti hai.. - uniteddj.com

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Santa- Kal meri shadi hai aur ladki walo ne kam log bulaye hai. . . . . Banta- To isme prob kya hai? . . . . . . . . . Santa-pata nhi papa mujhe le jaynge ya nhi.. - Uniteddj.com

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GF: Where R u ... ?? . . PAPPU: I'm At "Bank" . . GF: I Need 30,000 F or New Cell Phone & 10,000 For New Mini Skirts. . . . . PAPPU: Sorry, I Mean I'm At ' Blood Bank ' "KHOON PIYEGI KHOON"... ?? - Uniteddj.com

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Pappu: “Pichhle Hafte Meri Aur Meri Girlfriend Ki Ladai Ho Gayi Thi Aur Hum Alag Ho Gaye” . Golu: “Phir?” . Pappu: “Usne Mujhe ChidhaneKe Liye Apne Naye Boyfriend Ke Sath Photo Khinchva Ke Mujhe Bhej Di” . Golu: “Ohh, Ye To Bahot Bura Kiya Usne” . Pappu: “To Main Bhi Konsa Kam Hu, Utha Ke Photo Uske Baap Ko Bhej Di...!!! - Uniteddj.com

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Aajkal Ladkiyo k college bag me copy kitaab ki jaga kya kya samaan milega.. ?? . . EK kanghi.. . . Ek perfume ki chhoti sisi.. . . Ek facial cream.. Ek eye brow set karne wali kanghi.. Lakme moisturizer.. 3-4 rumaal.. Lakme compact Lakme kajal Ek chhota sa sisa.. Balo mai lagane wale 3-4 pin.. . . Class mai bhi makeup karti hai aur Fir bolti hai boys hame ghoorte kyun rehte hai Ab hum Kya Karen - Uniteddj.com

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B F: i want 2 kiss u GF:no!! pregnant ho jaungi . . . . . . BF: kiss se pregnant !! GF: Kyunki mai jab ek baar shuru hoti hoon.. . phir mai khud ki bhi nhi sunti.....Lolzzz - Uniteddj.com

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History Ki Teacher Ne Pappu Ko Khada Kiya Aur Sawal Puchha.... Teacher: “ Batao Ganga Kahan Se Nikalti Hai Aur Kaha Ja Ke Milti Hai??? ” Pappu: “ Madam, Ganga School Ke Bahane Ghar Se Nikalti Hai Aur Mandir Ke Piche Veet Se Jaakar Milti Hai.” - Uniteddj.com

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Dil diya tha mohabat ki nishani samajh kar, Woh khaa gya usey biryani samajh kar, Khoon-e-jigar bhi na chora zalim ne, Woh bhi pee gya leemo paani samajh kar.! - Uniteddj.com

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Macchar ne jo kata… dil main mere junoon tha. Khujli hui itni… dil be sukoon tha. Pakada to chod diya yeh soch kar ki….sale ki ragon main apna hi khoon tha ! - Uniteddj.com

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Dosti ka hr frz hum jante hai, tumhare har dard ki dava hum jante hain. Humein bhulne ki kabhi koshish bhi mat karna kyunki hum gala dabana bhi jante hain - Uniteddj.com

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Likho to paigam kuch aisa likho ki kalam bhi rone ko majbur ho gaye… Har lafz me dard itna bhar do ki examiner bhi pass karne ko majbur ho jaye…. - Uniteddj.com

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Ab jab gira baadal, teri yaad ai, Jhoom ke barsa saawan, teri yaad ai, Bheega main, lekin phir bhi teri yaad ai, Kiyun na aey teri yaad? Tune jo chhatri ab tak nahi lautai… - Uniteddj.com

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During exam:" . . Yeh bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . . . . . . . . . . . . In Result:" yeh kyaa ho gaya... - Uniteddj.com

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Hus & wife Talaaq k baad Hus:Bacha mera hay Wife:Waah Jee Waah..! Bartan mera Doodh mera Thora sa Khata kia daal diya poora Dahi tera? - Uniteddj.com

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Biwi shohar se: aaj ap daftar se jaldi kese aa gae? Shohr: achanak mere boss ko gusa aa gaya or bola jahanum mein jao, to me foran utha or tumhare pas chala aya…. - Uniteddj.com

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Hus & wife Talaaq k baad Hus:Bacha mera hay Wife:Waah Jee Waah..! Bartan mera Doodh mera Thora sa Khata kia daal diya poora Dahi tera? … - Uniteddj.com

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Apne chare se ruswaie ka ERROR to hataho, Ab bohat ho gaya apne dil ka PASSWORD to bataho, Axser raat ko app mere sapne mein aatein hain, Mere pyar ko MOUSE banake englio pe nachate hain, Or tere pyar ka E-MAIL mere dil ko labhata hai, Beach mein tera baap VIRUS banke aa jaata hai. [...] - Uniteddj.com

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Lady drinking coke, machhar falls in. Lady takes it out, machhar says MAA! Lady asks why did you call me MAA? machhar says, Main teri coke se nikla hoon, MAA! - Uniteddj.com

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It was written on an old man’s T-shirt: . . . “I am not 60″ . . . . “I am 18 with 42 years of . . . . experience” . . . That’s Attitude . . . . Think Different - Uniteddj.com

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oh kehndi Ke jiniya Mere kol "NAIL PAINT" va ohne tere kol "kapdE" ni Hone ,, Main Keha ta Jine Mere YAAR aw na,, oone Tere "RISHTEDAAR" ni Hone - Uniteddj.com

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ਘਰਵਾਲੀ = ਜੇ ਮੈ ਗਵਾਚ ਗਈ ਤੁਸੀਂ ਕੀ ਕਰੋ ਗੇ ਘਰਵਾਲਾ = ਅਖਬਾਰ ਵਿਚ ਇਸ਼ਤਿਆਰ ਦਵਾਗਾ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ = ਖੁਸ਼ ਹੋਕੇ ਵਾਓ " ਕੀ ਇਸ਼ਤਿਆਰ ਦਵੋਗੇ . . . . . . . . . ਘਰਵਾਲਾ = ਜਿੰਨੇ ਲੱਭ ਲਈ ਉਹਦੀ...,,,,, - Uniteddj.com

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Gadha(Donkey) - Mera Maalik Bahot Marta Hai Yaar.. . . Dog - To Tu Bhag Jaa. . . Gadha :- Nahi Yaar... . Dog : Lekin Kyo ? . Gadha : Uski Ladki Jab Padhayi Nahi Karti To Wo Kehta Hai Ki Teri SHADI Gadhe Se Kara Dunga . Bas Isi UMMEED Pe Tika Hu.....! - Uniteddj.com

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Girl :ap mujhe lift denge to mainapko apna cell no. dungi...... ...Boy : Jahan chaho wahan chhor dunga, Numbr vmbr rehne do, Bas 100 ka petrol dalwa dena baji. Uffff "Mehangai ne ladko ko bhishareef bana diya hai " - Uniteddj.com

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Do Ladkiyaan Train Mein Safar Kar Rahi Thi, Ek Ladki Ne Time Pass Ke Liye Dusri Se Puchha Ladki: “Tujhe Kaisa Pati Chahiye?” Dusri: “Mujhe Crorepati Chahiye” Pahli: “Crorepati Na Mile To?” Dusri: “50 Lakh Ke 2 Pati Chalenge” Pahli: “50 Lakh Ke Na Mile To?” Dusri: “25 Lakh Ke 4 Pati Bhi Chalenge” Uppar Birth Pe Lete Hue Santa Ne Ye Suna Aur Bola. Santa: “Jab Ye 1000 Rupaye Pe Aaye To Mujhe Bata Dena“ - Uniteddj.com

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Satsang me baba Ramdev bole: aaj ki auratein itne jaleel kapde pehanti hain k sab nazar aata hai.. Unki kameez nazar aati hai, Unki taange nazar aati hain, Unka jism nazar aata hai, Khula ang-pardarshan hota hai... Peeche se Santa ki awaz aayi, " "Baba ji aap parvachan do..mood mat banao raat ko need nahi aayegi=D=)) - Uniteddj.com

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Bush:" Osama mile toh use fod do.. Gandhi:" Hinsa achi baat nhi, use chod do.. Einstein:" Samay rukta nhi, to use mod do.. Manmohan:" theek hai" Sonia:" desh k liye mujhe vote do.. Arnold Schwarzenegger:" Biceps build karne k liye uspar load do.. Bill Gates:" Windows unlock karne k liye use code do! Rajnikanth:" oye admin ! mere kaarname duniya k samne lana chhod do And d best 1 . . . ACP Praduman:" Daya, khooni andar hai main kehta hu darwaza tod do.. - Uniteddj.com

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Husband :- " Kamar Me Bahot Dard Hai.. . Baaju Ke Ghar Se IODEX Le Aao.. . . . . Wife :- "Wo Nahi Denge... . . . . . . . . Husband :- "Kitne Kanjoos Hai Saaale, . . . . . . . . Jaane Do, Apna Hi Nikal Lo, Almaari Me Rakha Hai... - Uniteddj.com

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Din raat msg kar kar k aisa kar dia tum logon ne muje Zalimo.. . . . Ghar ki ghanti bajne pr b mobile utha leta hoon.. - uniteddj.com

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Me:" I love you.. . Girl:" Shutup.. . Me:" I Like you.. . Girl:" Shutup.. . Me:" I Miss you.. . Girl:" Shutup.. . . . Me:" you are really pretty !! . . Girl:" Really ?? . . . . Me:" SHUTUP.... :p :o ;p - uniteddj.com

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Kamina Dost:" Extreame level . Ek baar do dost the .. chalte chalte unhe ek chiraag mila.. . Use ghisa to usme se jin nikla.. . jin bola:" Hukum mere aaka..!! mein tum dono ki 3 wishes poori karunga.. 1st dost:" meri colony ki saari ladkiyo ko meri GF bana do.. 2nd dost:" mujhe ek Helmet chahiye.. 1st dost:" bagal wali colony ki saari ladkiyo ko bhi meri GF bana do.. . . 2nd dost:" mujhe ek bike aur chahiye.. . 1st dost:" ek pure city ki ladkiyo ko meri GF bana do.. . . (U will surely love this ) 2nd dost:" Ab ise "Gay" bana do.. - Uniteddj.com

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In india. . on a bus stand.. . at a book stall.. : : an american engineer got heart attack.. : becoz.. : : : : he saw a book : "how to become an engineer in 15 days" worth rs. 15.. - Uniteddj.com

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Wife apne Husband se boli:" Dekho Ji , Kaam karte Waqt mere ko Kiss-Wiss na kiya karo.. . . . . . . Tabhi Kaamwali Bai Boli:" Madam Ji, Achhi Tarah se Samjha do, Main to bol-bol ke Thak Gayi... Wife Shocked.. - UnitedDj.com

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Profeser : Agar tumhare paas 2 option ho ke tum kiske sath sona pasand karoge? . 20 saal ki larki ya tumse 20 saal bari aurat ?? . . . . . . . . Papu : Sir Depend karta hai ki kaun jyada khubsurat hai, ApkiBeti ya apki Bivi... . Proffesor shocked Papu Rocked m/ - UnitedDj.com

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ਉਹ _ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ _ ਲੜਨ _ ਨਾਲ _ਪਿਆਰ _ਵਧਦਾ . . . . . . . . ਇਹ _ ਸੁਣ _ ਕੇ _ ਮੈ _ ਓਹਦੀ _ ਅੱਖ _ 'ਤੇ ਮੁਕਾ _ ਮਾਰ _ਕੇ _ ਭੱਜ _ ਗਿਆ - UnitedDj.com

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Army Training k doran 1 officer ne sipahi se pocha: Ye hath me kia hai? . . Sipahi santa: Sir Ye bandooq hai. . . Officer: Ye bandooq nhi tumhari izzat or shan hai,tumhari maa hai maa!! . . Then Officer to a sipahi banta Singh: Tumhare hath me ye kya hai? . . Banta: Sir, Ye santa ki maa hai or hamari aunty hai.. !! :D:D - UnitedDj.com

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Chicken Aise Pakao Ke Kacha Na Ho, Wah Wah…. . . Chicken Aise Pakao Ke Kaccha Na Ho, . . . . Aur Mohabbat Aise Nibhao Ke Bacha Na Ho... . - Uniteddj.com

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English ਸਕੂਲ ਦੇ ਬੱਚੇ:- "Oh!!! Woww..look a doggy is sleeping. .lets not disturb" . . ਤੇ ਸਰਕਾਰੀ ਸਕੂਲ ਦੇ ਬੱਚੇ :- . . . . . . . "ਦੇਖ ਤੇਰਾ ਬੂੜਾ ਸੁੱਤਾ ਪਿਆ.. .ਰੋੜਾ ਮਾਰ ਸਾਲੇ ਦੇ" . - Uniteddj.com

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BF:" Tum Mujhe kitna pyar karti ho . . . . GF:" Arz Maarti hu.. . . Chaha Hai jise chahat se zyada . . Samja Hai jise khud se zyada . . Bharosa Hai jispe sabse zyada . . Tu hi Hai woh "HARAMZADA - Uniteddj.com

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Frnd k saath kro ya grlfrnd ksath, . . room me kro ya badroom me, . . bed par kro ya fir sofe pe, . . din me kro ya fir raat me, . . ground me karo ya garden me kro, . . aakhir exam me pass hone k liye padhai to karni padegi na... - Uniteddj.com

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ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਤੂ ਵੀ ਰਾਂਝੇ ਵਾਂਗ 12 ਸਾਲ ਸਾਡੀਆ ਮੱਝਾਂ ਚਾਰ ਸਕਦਾ . .. . ... ... . . .. . ਮੈਂ ਹੱਸ ਕੇ ਕੇਹਾ Biba ਤੇਨੁ ਰਾਂਝਾ ਚਹੀਦਾ ਕੇ ਰਾਮੂ - Uniteddj.com

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During exam:" . . Yeh bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho . . In Result:" yeh kyaa ho gaya... - Uniteddj.com

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Height Of Good Luck..! . . Teacher: Stand up. Tell Me Two Pronouns...? . . . . . . . . . . . . . Student: Who..?? Me..?? .. Teacher: Very Good,Sit Down - Uniteddj.com

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DEAR BOYS Larkion ke Chakkar Me Mat Parna . . Dosto . . . Kyun ki . Ye Aati Hain HEER Ki Tarha Ye Aati Hain HEER Ki Tarha Lagti Hain KHEER Ki Tarha Lagti Hain KHEER Ki Tarha Chubhti Hain TEER Ki Tarha . . Or End Me Or End Me Halat Kar Deti Hain FAKEER Ki Tarha. : - Uniteddj.com

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Tata NANO ki neelami ho rahi thi . . Boli lagi.. 5 lakh 10 lakh 20 lakh . . Santa: Is sastey aur purane GaAdi me aisa kya hai bhai ? .. Seller: Is ke 12 accident hue hai, har bar sirf biwi mari hai. .. Santa: iski maa ki aankh ... 1 Crore ... - Uniteddj.com

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Height Of Double Meaning . . . . . . After Election PM Of India . . ManMohan Singh Said:" Yeh To Sonia G Ke Hath Ka Kamal Hai, . . Werna Is Umar Mein Mera Khada Hona Mushkil Tha.. - Uniteddj.com

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ਬਾਰੀ ਬਰਸੀ ਖੱਟਣ ਗਿਆ ਸੀ ਖੱਟ ਕੇ ਲਿਆਂਦਾ ਪੋਣਾ, ਫੋਟੋ ਮੇਰੀ ਵੇਖ ਕੇ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਤੂੰ ਮੁੰਡਾ ਬਾਹਲਾ ਸੋਹਣਾ ,ਜੱਦ ਕੀਤੇ ਮੈਂ 4-5 message ਕਹਿੰਦੀ,ਤੇਰੇ ਵਰਗਾ ਕੰਜਰ ਕੋਈ ਨੀ ਹੋਣਾ...... - Uniteddj.com

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LADY to tharki Baba-- mere pati roz aadhi raat ko kahin chale jate hain, aur subah tak vapas nahi aate. . . Baba: Sundari..! Ye "Samasya" hai yaa... "Amantran"..? - Uniteddj.com

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3 chor Billu, Sonu aur Santa, police se chhup k 3 boriyon me ghus gaye. Police wala aya, usne pehli bori me laat mari.. Billu bola, BOW-BOW.. Police wala- kutta hai- dusri bori me laat mari. . Sonu bola, MIAUU.. Police wala- billi hai.. Teesri bori me laat mari., koi awaz nai ayi.. Fir mari., koi awaz nai. . 20-25 laat mari to andar se Santa chillaya:- Abe haramkhor, AALOO kabhi bolta hai kya.. - Uniteddj.com

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Pappu:" bhagwan meri shadi katrina se kara do.._/_ . . Bhagwan:" Uski ek saree 1 lac ki hai, tu kharcha kar payega.. ?? . . . Pappu:" Koi upay bhagvan . . . Bhagvaan:" Mallika Sherawat.. - Uniteddj.com

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Only 842 girls are left for every 1000 boys in india SAVE GIRLS !!! .. we can save the tigers later, . . Bike pe piche ladki chahiye ya tiger ?? . . choice is yours.... Janhit Mein Jaari.... .. Bachcho..nari boht h jaroori.. - Uniteddj.com

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CHINA Cricket Kyon Nhi Khelta.? . . . . Kyonki TECHNICAL Problem Hae Sab Players Ka Face Ek Jaisa Hota Hai Jo Out Ho Gaya Wahi Muh Dhoke Phir Se Aa Skta hai... - uniteddj.com

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Ek ladki ne chote bacche k gaal par kiss kiya . Girl- Oh, sorry tumhare gaal pe lipstick lag gayi . . . . Baccha- kuch acha karne se agar daag lagte hai to daag ache hai - UnitedDj.com

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Pyar kabhi na karna pardesi se, Rote-Rote naina thak jayenge, Pyar karna ho to karo hamesha padosi se, Roz balcony se darshan to ho jayenge.. - UnitedDj.com

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Baharo ful barsao mera dost aaya hai, hotho pe muskan gali me mahak laya hai, barso tak thi jise pani se Elarzy.. wo aaj lux se nahaya hai! - UnitedDJ.com

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A child prayed to god, "plz give me a cycle" . But he didn't got any cycle. next day, he stole a ganesh statue & wrote letter to lord shiva . . . . . . . . Agar bacha chahiye to cycle lekar mandir aaja... - UnitedDj.com

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In 2020, ... . . BIKHARI : Bhagwan k naam pe kuch de de. ENGINEER : Ye le meri B.tech ki degree rakh le. . . . . . BIKHARI : Tujhe chahiye to meri M.tech ki rakhle ... !! - UnitedDj.com

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Fees maafi ke liye application To, The principal Sir, Baat ye hui k mere dad ne muje fees k liye Rs.500 diye the. 100 ki film dekhi, 150 ki drink, 50 ka Girlfriend ka Recharge karva diya, 200 science wali mam par shart haar gaya. Mai samajta tha k unka sirf Maths wale Sir k sath chakkar hai, par unka to aapke sath b chakkar nikla! Ab apke paas 2 hi raste he: Meri fees maaf ya Aapke raaz ka pardaafaash! Thanx Ur sincerely Apki beti ka boyfriend..!! - UnitedDj.com

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Ladka bola Dilruba:) Ladki boli Pizza khila:) . . Ladka bola Paise nhi . Ladki boli Aise kaise nhi Ladka bola Mahngai hai:| . . . Ladki boli Aaj se tu mera bhai hai - UnitedDj.com

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Boy: My Father's name is LAUGHING and my Mother's name is SMILING . . . . . . Teacher: You must be Kidding? . . . . . Boy: No, that's my brother. I am JOKING.. - UnitedDj.com

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Obama:" we have 3 item bombs . . Madonna, Shakira Angelina . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Manmohan:" we have professional bomb diffuser . . EMRAAN HASHMI.. - UnitedDj.com

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»» Which One Hurts Most To Lose: → 1. Phone → 2. Virginity → 3. Teeth → 4. Money → 5. Lover → 6. Trust → 7. Other(specify) - UnitedDj.com

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Likhe Jo Khat Tujhe, . . . . Wo teri yaad mein, . . . Saare Padh liye Papa ne raat me..!! . . . . Sawera Jab hua , toh Joote Pad gaye...!! . . . . Wo FANAA wale Baal GHAJNI me badal gaye...!! ...:X - UnitedDj.com

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Aaj Ke Bacche. . . . . . . . Postman knocked the Door.. . A Kid came wid cigrete in mouth & Beer in hand.. . Postman:" Papa hain.. ?? . . . Kid:"Abe Bhootni K, Mujhe Dekh Ke Lagta Hai Baap Ghar pe Hoga.. Kid RocKz - Postman shock

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GiRL : WHERE is my BiRTHDAY GiFT? Boy : ROAD pe RED COLOUR ki CAR DEKH rahi ho? GiRL KHUSHi se : WOW. .. .. .. .. .. . .. .. .. Boy : SAME COLOUR ki NAiL- POLiSH tere Liye Laya hoon... - UnitedDj.com

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Ek Budha Ek ladki se Takraya.... Budha: Sorry... Ladki: Andha hai kya..... Dikhta nah!! Jaise hi aage badhi, Ek handsome ladka us ladki se takra gaya... Ladka: Sorry... Ladki: It's okay!! Budha ladki se bolta hai "MERI SORRY KI SPELLING GALAT THI KYA??" - UnitedDj.com

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Snta-Ye Chhota Medal Tumhe Kyu Mila H? Bnta-Gane K Liye, Snta-Aur Ye Bada Wala? Bnta-Apna Gana Band Krne K Lie - UnitedDj.com

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Girl - ur name? boy- black lion G -r u joking? B - no, it means kaalu singh. and ur's girl- Soft underwear boy-r u joking? girl-no it means komal chadda. - UnitedDj.com

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Doctor: You must exercise daily for good health Pappu: I play football, cricket and tennis almost daily. . . Doctor: How long do you play? Pappu: Until the battery in my mobile dies down! :D :P v - UNitedDj.com

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Banta dairy likh raha tha "aaj meri behan ko baccha hone wala hai pata nahi ladka hoga ya ladki, isliye mujhe ye bhi pata nahi ki me . . . . mama banunga ya mami" :D :D - UnitedDJ.com

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Height of girl's Nakhre...!! Doctor: "kya hua hai aapko"?? . . . . . . . . . . Girl: "Hmmm... "Nazar lag gai hai.." :D - UnitedDj.com

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Girl:" Do you like me ?? . Boy:" No . . Girl got sad ...................... . Boy:" Why are you sad ?? . . Girl:" Coz u don't like me . . Boy:" U never asked "do you love me " ? . . Girl:" Awwww, ok do you love me??? . . . Boy:" No... :p :D - UnitedDj.com

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ek sharabi k haath JINN lag gaya Jinn:" koi 3 wishes mango Sharabi:" 1 daru ki bottle jo kabhi khatam na ho Jinn ne bottle pesh ki.... sharabi ne bottle milte hi peena shuru kiya.. Jaise hi last peg glass mein dala to bottle firse bhar gayi sharabi khush, phir peene laga... Jinn ne 2 aur wish mangne ko kaha sharabi Bahut khush ho ke bola:" . . . Aisi hi 2 bottle aur de de.. :p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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New joined in office... Me: Hi She: Hi Me: How are you doing? You looking great! She: I am fine. Thanks! Me: What's your name? She: ZOYA Me: Oh ZOYA!!!.... Ummmm...I have a meeting. Bye! She: meeting ? Suddenly? !! Me: yeah, I have seen Jannat, Ishqazaade and Ranjhana!!! :p :o :D - UnitedDj.com

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Different types of Girlfriend fighting with their boyfriend.. Pilot's Girlfriend : Zyada ud Matt Samjha Teacher's Girlfriend : Mujhe mat Sikhao Samjhe Dentist's Girlfriend : Daant tod ke hath me de dungi C.A.'S Girlfriend : Hisaab se reh samjha... Engineer's Girlfriend : . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . " Abey pehle Pass toh ho ja fir baat karna" :p - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਝੰਡਾ ਅਮਲੀ ਗੱਡੀ ਤੇ ਜਾ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਰਸਤੇ ਵਿੱਚ ਪੁਲਿਸ ਦਾ ਨਾਕਾ ਲੱਗਿਆ ਹੋਇਆ ਸੀ... . . ਥਾਣੇਦਾਰ ਨੇ ਅਮਲੀ ਨੂੰ ਕਿਹਾ :- ਹਾਂ ਬਈ ਬੈਲਟ ਨੀ ਲਾਈ ? . . ਅਮਲੀ ਸੋਚ ਕੇ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ :- ਜਨਾਬ ਮੇਰੇ ਤਾ ਪਜਾਮਾ ਪਾਇਆ ਹੋਇਆ..... :P :D - UnitedDj.com

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PYAR TO 1 BAHANA HAI ankh mile na mile lips ko milana hai yehi style hai sab ASHIQON KA. Kya kare jan! Raj kapour ka nahi IMRAN HASHMI ka zmana ha. Read more: http://latestsms.in/sms-jokes.htm#ixzz2Y4rZL5dc

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santa 500 k note pr likha nmbr dial kr rha tha banta- ye tum kya kr rahe ho? yar me dekh raha hu gandhi ji to chale gaye par unka mobile kiske pas hai - UnitedDj.com

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Q: College Me Ladkiyon Ke Kitne Nam Hote Hai ? Ans:5 1.Meri Vali 2.Teri Vali 3.Teri Bhabhi 4.Meri Bhabhi Or Na Pate To 5.Kamini Saali. - UnitedDj.com

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Ladki:- mat kar mera picha 1 din pachtayega, bhar coleg k tu chole bhature ki shop lagayega..... Ladka:- tu mat thukra mere pyar ko, 1 din pachtayegi, usi chole ki shop pe bartan manjti nayar aayegi - UnitedDJ.com

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Daughter: Mom aaj Ek ladke ne mere gal pe kiss kiya. . . ....... Mom: Tune usko chata mara ya nahi. . . . . . Daughter: Mujhe achanak Gandhiji yaad agaye aur maine dusra gal agge kar diya........ - UnitedDj.com

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AMERICAN LIFE STYLE . . . DAUGHTER:"Sorry Dad, I got married yesterday.. Forgot to invite you.. . DAD:"U naughty.. It's Ok.. But Don't forget next Time... :P - UnitedDj.com

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Munda kudi de baap nu-"Mainu tuhadi kudi da hath chahida..". . . . . Kudi da baap -Naa "Saaleya main dass ethey kudi de SPARE parts vechda !! :P - UnitedDj.com

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Santa nehar ch dig gya,te rabb nu keha, "rabba menu bacha lai,main tere chaawal chadawanga" rabb ne usnu baahar kadh ditta. baahar nikal k Santa kehnda "kehde chaawal"... rabb ne usnu fer nehar ch sutt ditta. Santa kehnda "mein ta eh puchda c,kehde chaawal. MITHE ya LOON wale... :P - UnitedDj.com

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Santa: hotel me khaali katori me roti dubo kar kha rha tha. Waiter: ye kaise khaa rahe ho? Santa: SHUT UP main Maths teacher hun. DAAL maine SUPPOSE ki hui hai. :P - UnitedDj.com

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Bush- Tujhe swiming aati hai? Lalu- No Bush- Tere se to Kutta acha hai jo swim kar leta hai Lalu- Tuje aati hai? Bush- Ya Lalu- Fir tere or Kute me kya fark hai - UNitedDj.com

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ਅਮਲੀ :: ਰਾਜਾ ਦਸ਼ਰਥ ਦੀਆਂ ਤਿੰਨ ਰਾਣੀਆ ਸੀ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ :: ਤੇ ਫਿਰ ? . ਅਮਲੀ :: ਇਸ ਦਾ ਮਤਲਬ ਮੈ ਦੋ ਵਿਆਹ ਹੋਰ ਕਰ ਸਕਦਾ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ :: ਦਰੋਪਦੀ ਦਾ ਨਾਮ ਸੁਣੀਆ ਏ ? . ਅਮਲੀ :: ਤੂੰ ਵੀ ਪਾਗਲ ਹੀ ਏਂ, ਦਿਲ ਤੇ ਲਾ ਲੈਣੀ ਏ ਮੈ ਤਾਂ ਮਜ਼ਾਕ ਕਰ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ :P - UnitedDj.com

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#ਬੱਚਾ ਘਰੋ ਕੁੱਟ ਖਾ ਕੇ #ਸਕੂਲ ਜਾ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਤੇ ਬਹੁਤ ਗੁੱਸੇ ਵਿੱਚ ਸੀ ਰਾਹ ਵਿੱਚ ਕਿਸੇ ਨੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ :- "ਬੱਚਾ ਜੀ ਪੜ੍ਹਦੇ ਓ " ਬੱਚਾ :- ਨਹੀਂ ਸਾਲਿਆ, ਸਕੂਲ ਦੀ #Dress ਪਾ ਕੇ ਤੇਰੀ ਮਾਂ ਦੇ #ਵਿਆਹ ਚੱਲਿਆਂ ! ਤੂੰ ਜਾਣਾ ?? :D :P - UnitedDj.com

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A GIRLFRIEND msgd her boyfriend (PAPPU) at 7am : . . If u r sleeping send me UR #Dreams, If u r crying send me UR #Tears, If u r laughing send me UR #Smiles" . . . . Pappu - "Potty kar rha hu bheju kya" . . No reply from girl.. xD Darr gayi bechari.......hahaha :P - UNitedDj.com

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Malinga's mom :: Beta haircut kara lena !!! #Malinga :: Kyu maa? . . . . . . . . . Malinga's Mom :: purane peetal ke bartan dhone hain scrubber chahiye :D :v - UnitedDj.com

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ਅਮਲੀ ਜਲੇਬੀਆਂ ਵੇਚ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਪਰ ਉਹ "ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ" ਕਹਿ ਕੇ ਵੇਚ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਇਕ ਬੰਦਾ ਕੋਲ ਆ ਕੇ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ :- ਵੇਚ ਤਾਂ ਤੂੰ ਜਲੇਬੀਆਂ ਰਿਹਾ ਏਂ ਤੇ "ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ" ਕਹੀ ਜਾ ਰਿਹਾ ਏ ਦਿਮਾਗ ਤਾਂ ਨਹੀਂ ਖਰਾਬ ਹੋ ਗਿਆ ਤੇਰਾ ? . . ਅਮਲੀ :- ਚੁਪ ਕਰ ਸਾਲਿਆ ਨਹੀਂ ਤਾਂ ਮੱਖੀਆਂ ਆ ਜਾਣਗੀਆਂ - UnitedDJ.com

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ਇਕ ਕੁੜੀ ਹਲਵਾਈ ਦੀ ਦੁਕਾਨ ਤੇ ਗਈ ਤੇ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ:-> ਜੀ ਪੂਰੀਆਂ ਪਾਰੀਆਂ ਮਿਲ ਜਾਣਗੀਆਂ.....? ਅੱਗੋ ਹਲਵਾਈ ਬੋਲਿਆ :-> . . "ਪੂਰੀਆਂ" ਤਾ ਮੁੱਕ ਗਈਆਂ "ਪਾਰੀਆਂ" ਜਿਨੀਆਂ ਮਰਜੀ ਲੈ ਲੋ.... ;) =) - UnitedDj.com

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Boy1 :: Meet my Wife Tina.. Boy2 :: Oh! I know her.. . . Boy1 :: oh How.. ?? Boy2 :: actually we were caught sleeping together :| . . Boy1 :: what.. ?? What the hell.. ?? :@ Boy2 :: during lecture in maths class dude... Think Positive yaar... :D :P - UnitedDj.com

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Santa's marriage got fixed for 2nd November. He sent an Invite to all his friends: . . . . Marriage is on 2nd, please come on the Ist Night. . We'll all have fun together! :P haha :v - UnitedDj.com

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Wife hit her husband with frying pan. Husband: What was that for…? Wife: I found a paper in your pocket with the name Jenny on it. Husband: I took part in a race last week and Jenny was the name of my horse. Wife: Sorry..! Next day wife hit him with the frying pan again Husband: What now..? Wife: Your horse is on the Phone. :) :P :D - UnitedDj.com

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Machchhar Ka Bachcha Paheli Baar Uda. Jab Wapis Aaya To Baap Ne Pucha,Kaisa Laga? Machchhar-Bahut Achchha,Jaha B Gaya Log TALIYA Baja Rahe the - UnitedDj.com

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Boy 1:" tune us ladki ke liye Cigarette chhor di..?? . . Boy 2:" haan Boy 1:" daru bhi chhor diya..?? Boy 2:" haan! . . . Boy 1:" Jua bhi chhor diya..??? . . Boy 2:" haan!! Boy 1:" abey to shaadi kyu nahi ki usse ???? . . . Boy 2:" yaar itna sudhar gya tha k usse achhi mil gyi aur usey chhor diya...:p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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Dr:Kaise aana hua? Santa: Doctorsaab tabiyat theek nahi hain Dr: Sharab peete ho? Santa: Peeta to hoon, par chhota peg hi banana. I'm not feeling well !=)) - UnitedDj.com

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Kehte hai khuda ne is jaha mai sabhi k liye kisi na kisi ko banaya hai.. . . . . . . . . . . . . Meri wali ne toh lagta hai suicide kar liya hai saali milti hi nahi... :-( - unitedDj.com

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Santa Banta Aur Pappu Picnic Par Gaye Wahan Ja Kar Yaad Aaya Ke Pepsi To Ghar Bhool Gaye, . Decide Kiya Ke Pappu Ja Kar Pepsi Le Aaye, . Pappu:- Main Is Shart Par JaungaKi Tum Mere Aane Tak Samose Nhi Khaoge... . Dono Ne Kaha Theek Hai, 1 Din Guzar Gaya Pappu Nhi Aaya,2 Din GuzarGaye 2no Ne Socha KeAb Samose Kha Lene Chahiye, Dono Ne Jaise Hi Samosa Uthaya.. Pappu Ped Ke Peche Se Nikal Ke Bola... . Aise Karoge To Main Nhi Jaonga.. - UnitedDj.com

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Police: Car Gas Par Hai Veeru : Nahi Sir Police: Petrol Par Veeru : Nahi Sir Police: Diesel Par Veeru : Nahi Sir Police: Phir Kis Par Hai Veeru: Installment Par Hai. - UnitedDj,com

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Santa Ke Bete Ka Acident Ho Gaya Dr: Aapke Bete K Pair Katne Padenge.. Santa Ne Apna Sir Pakda. Dr: Kya Hua Santa: Kal Hi Nalayak Ko Chapal Dilai Thi. - UnitedDj.com

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What is difference between- 1. Boyfrend, 2. Lover, 3. Husband 4. EX boyfrend. simple..yaar 1. prepaid, 2. postpaid, 3. Lifetime, 4. Coin box.!. - UnitedDj.com

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Tution sir: abey gadhe , homework kyun nahi kiya. New age student: tameez se baat kar sale, customer se koi aise baat karta hai kya? - UnitedDj.com

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Santa ne Ghar ka Darwaza ukhara or kandhe pe rakh k Bazar me gya.. . 1 Admi ne pucha:" santa, Kya Darwaza Bechnahai.. ?? . Santa:" Nhi Tala Khulwana hai.. Chabi gum ho gye hai.. Hanso mat Joke abhi aage hai.. . . . . Admi santa se:" Agar ghar me chor ghus gayato.. ?? . . Santa :" abe Andar kaise jayega darwaza to humare paas hai.. Hahaha .... - UnitedDj.com

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Boy n girl on fb girl:- “u never smile na??” boy:-“hw can u say dis??” ... girl:-“ur smiling pics r mising here” boy:-“ok then …do u bath daily??” girl:-“ya ofcorse..y u asking??” boy:-“no, I hvnt seen .any pic….” :D :D :D - UnitedDj.com

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Veeru apni bhabhi ko bahut maar raha tha, Logo ne pucha:" kya hua Veeru..??? Veeru bola:" meri bhabhi acchi aurat nahi hai, . . Logo ne pucha:" kyu kya hua..??? Veeru bola:" yaar mere dost mobile pe baat karte hai, jis se bhi pucho:" kis se baat kar rahe ho..??? . . sab bolte hein:" . . . . . "TERI BHABHI SE... - UnitedDj.com

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Apki Bato Pe DiL Haru WAH! WAH! Apki Surat Pe Jan Waru WAH! WAH! Jis Din NHi Aata Apka SMS DiL Krta H Apko patak-patak k Maru! Ab BoLo Wah! Wah! - UnitedDj.com

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Santa apni gf k gar pe rat me milne gya . Santa - chalo ab hum thoda pyar kar lete h . Gf -nhi .meri ma dekh legi . Santa -nhi dekh sakegi .meri jimmedari hai . Meri jimmedari hai. (gf ki ma jag jati h or ladki ki pitai karne lagti h ) santa - meri koi jimmedari nhi h . - UnitedDJ.com

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Santa:Dr.mein jab baat karta hu 2 muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai,aadmi nahi dikhta.Dr:Aisa kab hota hai Santa:Phone karte waqt. - UnitedDj.com

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Never KISS a lady police She will say .hands up. Never KISS a lady doctor She will say, Next please Always KISS a lady teacher, She will say, repeat it 5 time - UnitedDj.com

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Sari Raat Unka Number Hum Milaate Rahe, . Customer Care Wali Aunty Kehti Sajan Apke Busy Kisi Aur K Sath, Hum Re-dial Pe Re-dial Dabaate Rahe, . Raat Se Subah Hone Ko Aa Gai, Subah Jab Hui Unse Mulakat, Iljam Ek Duje Par Lagaate Rahe, . Gusse Me Call Register CheckKiya To Pata Chala, Ke Hum Unko Aur Vo Hume Ek Hi Time Pe No. Milaate Rahe.! - UnitedDj.com

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Me : "bhaiya samose ache nahi bane aaj,, Kal wale ache the." Shop owner " "kya baat kar rahe ho bhaiya,,, ye Kal wale hi toh hai." :o :/ - UNitedDj.com

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Bigdi Hui Zindgi Ki Bas Itni Si Kahaani Hai.... . . . Wah... Wah... Wah ... Wah ... . . 20% To Hum Bachpan Se Kamine The.... . . . 80% Facebook / Twitter / Bbw / Whatsup Ki Meharbaani Hai.. :p - UnitedDj.com

Bigdi Hui Zindgi Ki Bas Itni Si Kahaani Hai.... . . . Wah... Wah... . . 20% To Hum Bachpan Se Kamine The.... . . . 80% Facebook / Twitter / Bbw / Whatsup Ki Meharbaani Hai.. :p

Im a great fan of Thomas Edison, Because of his quote that.. . . . . . . . . Tomorrow is my exam but I dont care.. Because a single sheet of paper cannot decide my future...:p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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That Awkward M0ment, . . . . . . . . When You Ign0re Someone's Ph0ne Call & They Call Y0u Fr0m Someone Else's Phone & You Answer It :p - UnitedDj.com

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Ek shadi me ek ladka 1 ladki ko bahut dhyan se dekh rha tha .... Girl : -- impress hokar -- kyo dekh rhe ho itni der de - . . . . Boy-- I was thinking agar aap meri mummy hoti to, . . . mai bhi kitna sundar hota :p :D - UnitedDj.com

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Husband: Raja Dasarath Ke 3 Rani Thi.. Wife: To Kya..? Husband: To Main 2 Shaadiya Aur Kar Sakta Hu........ Wife: Draupadi Ka Naam Suna Hai? Husband: Tu Bhi Na Pagli Dil Pe Le Leti Hai......:) - UnitedDj.com

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Bacha:- Bhagwan kare teacher ki zuban cut jaye. Roz roz dant ti hai. Next day zuban cut gai..Bacha :- Bhagwan kare master ka hath toot jaye. Tang krta hai... bahut marta hai. Next day hath toot jata hai... Bacha :- Bhagwan mere BAAP ko utha le. Bahut marte hai. Next day baap ghar aate hain, Bacha :- Papa Aapko kuch nahi hua ?? Baap :- Nahi kyo Bacha :- Maa kahan hain...?? Baap :- pados me SHARMA uncle ki death ho gai hai, wahan Gayi hain...:( - UnitedDj.com

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Ek Ladki Ne Page Inbox Me Mujhse Kaha Ki Mujhse Kaha Ki "Aap Bhut Achi Post Krte Ho" ♥ . Awwwwww. Maine Kaha To Fir Tum Like Kyu Nhi Krti Ho?? (Y)Vo Boli- Nhi Main To Apki Har Post 2-2 Baar Like Krti Hun...:o :P :/ Ab Aap Hi Btao. Kaun Samjhay In :P :D Ladkiyon Ko. :-P :-P ;-) - UnitedDj.com

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Dear Facebook..! Whenever I Add A Girl, You Always Ask Me "Do You Know Her??? I Just Want To Ask Behan Lagti Hai Wo Teri..???? - UnitedDj.com

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Me watching TV alone.!! Ads: Cycle Agarbatti, Maggi, Noodles, Ultratech Cement, etc etc Suddenly Parents enter.!! Ads: Manforce Condoms, Whisper, Choice, Set Wet very very sexy etc etc :o :p - UnitedDj.com

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Teacher:" agar raat me machhar kate to kya karna chahiye.. Boy:" chup chap khuja kar so jana chahiye qki aap rajnikant to ho nhi.. jo machhar se sorry bulwa loge...:p :O :/ - UnitedDj.com

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Ek JAPANI INDIA me aaya.. Airport se usne ek Auto Liya aur hotel ki taraf gaya.. Raste me usko ek Honda car dikhayi di.. Japani:"HONDA made in JAPAN... very fast... Aage usko ek Toyota car ne over take kiya.. Japani:"TOYOTA made in JAPAN... very fast.. Hotel pahuch kar usne driver se poocha kitne paise hue.. ?? Driver:"RS. 8000.. Japani:"Itne paise.. ?? wo kaise.. ?? Driver:"METER made in INDIA.....''VERY VERY FAST.. Hum se panga... - UnitedDj.com

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Husband Sitting with His Wife in Restaurant, Drinking Beer n Says:- "I Love U" Wife:- Is It U Or The Beer Talking ? Husband:- Its Me, Talking To My Beer, U Shut Up - UnitedDj.com

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Ek survey se malum hua hai ki.. agar patni karwa chauth k vrat ki bajay... MAUN VRAT rakhe to pati ki umar aur lambi ho sakati hai !! - UnitedDj.com

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Santa to doctor:" Jab mein sota hu to mere sapne me Live IPL Cricket match aane lagta hai.. Doctor:" Koi baat nahi ye medicine sone se pehle kha lena.. Santa:" Kal se khaonga, aaj to final match hai... :p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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Wife is angry as hubby stands too close to a beautiful girl in bus, girl slaps him for pinching. Hubby to wife: I swear I didn't . Wife: I know, I did it. :p :p =)) - UnitedDj.com

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Husband wife watching an a Cricket match together:" After 5 minutes:" Wife:" Is this Bret Lee ?? Husband:" No, this is Chris Gayle, Bret Lee is a bowler.. Wife:" Okay, oh look, another wicket.. Husband:" No, this is just a replay of the last one..b Wife:" Hmm, looks like India is going to win this one..? Husband:" It's Austraila V/s west Indies Wife:" How many runs they need to win now ?? Husband:" 72 runs in 36 balls.. Wife:" Ehnn! That's easy, just 2 runs in 1 ball.. Husband:" *Turns off the TV* Wife:" Turns it on again and starts watching "Daily serial" Husband:" Who is she ?? Wife:" dont disturb me... :p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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1 medical student ne apni classmet ko, khoon se love-letter likh kar diya.......... aur kaha :- mujhe iska jawab jaroor dena Ladki :- tumhara blood group B hai & calcium ki kami hai - UnitedDj.com

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2013:" wife.. Husband:" Begam ek cup garma-garam chai bna do jara.. Wife:" kyyaaaaa..?? Zara phir kehna.. Husband:" maine kaha g, ek cup chai bana dun aapko..??? :p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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Ek aurat ki bade shaher me interview ke baad naukari�� lag gai, usne socha 'apne pati ko SMS✉ kar du, taaki unhe chinta na ho' Par Usne Galati se galat no. Par SMS✉ bhej diyaJisko ye MSG✉ mila wo apni patni ka antim sanskaar kar ke lautraha thaa, SMS✉ padh te hi wo behosh ho gaya. MSG✉ kuch is tarah ka thaa...... ....'mai sahi salamat pahuch gai hu, yaha rahene ki b achhi suvidhaa hai, aap chinta mat karna 1 - 2 din me aap ko bi bula lungi... - UnitedDJ.com

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Boy-I fell in love wit u the minute i saw u. wil u marry me? Girl-Hindi me bol muje english na ati Boy-Aaj shayad barish hogi aisa lag raha hai behen. - UnitedDj.com

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ਇਕ ਲੜਕਾ ਆਪਣੇ ਕਮਰੇ ਚ ਅੱਖਾਂ ਬੰਦ ਕਰਕੇ ਅਰਦਾਸ ਕਰ ਰਿਹਾ ਹੈ " ਹੇ ਵਾਹਿਗੁਰੂ ਨਿਊ ਯੌਰਕ ਨੂੰ ਪੰਜਾਬ ਦੀ ਕੈਪੀਟਲ ਬਣਾਦੇ" ਉਸਦਾ ਬਾਪ ਕਮਰੇ ਚ ਆਉਂਦਾ ਹੈ ਤੇ ਪੁਛਦਾ ਹੈ " ਤੂੰ ਇਹ ਕਿਉਂ ਮੰਗ ਰਿਹਾ ਏਂ" ? ਲੜਕਾ " ਕਿਉਂਕ ਮੈਂ ਪੇਪਰ ਚ ਨਿਊ ਯੌਰਕ ਨੂੰ ਹੀ ਪੰਜਾਬ ਦੀ ਕੈਪੀਟਲ ਲਿਖਕੇ ਆਇਆ ਹਾਂ" - UnitedDj.com

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ਇੱਕ ਮਰਾਸੀ ਨੇ ਆਪਣੇ ਮੁੰਡੇ ਲਈ ਇੱਕ ਜੱਟ ਦੇ ਘਰ ਜਾ ਕੇ ਉਸ ਦੀ ਕੁੜੀ ਦਾ ਰਿਸ਼ਤਾ ਮੰਗਿਆ | ਜੱਟ ਨੂੰ ਗੁੱਸਾ ਚੜ ਗਿਆ ਤੇ ਉਸ ਨੇ ਮਰਾਸੀ ਨੂੰ ਗੋਡਿਆਂ ਥੱਲੇ ਦੇ ਕੇ ਖੂਬ ਕੁਟਿਆ | ਮਰਾਸੀ ਕੁੱਟ ਖਾ ਕੇ , ਕਪੜੇ ਝਾੜਦਾ ਹੋਇਆ ਬੋਲਿਆ - -- ਫੇਰ ਮੈਂ ਹੁਣ ਰਿਸ਼ਤੇ ਵਲੋਂ ਨਾਂਹ ਸਮਝਾ . . . . - UnitedDj.com

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Teacher asks students about sound made by animals Teacher : dog Student : bark Teacher : cat Student : meow Teacher : lion Student : aaah aaaaaaah ......yeehh yeehhh .......commme oonnnn Teacher : i said lion not 'leone' Student : O Teri ... :P ;) - UnitedDj.com

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Gunehgaar kaun ??? PATI aur PATNI so rahe the... Achaanak, PATNI sapna dekh ke chillayi, "bhago,mera PATI aa gaya". PATI utha aur khidki se kud gaya.... - UnitedDj.com

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Women are like Fruits... Every one has its unique colour, shape, aroma and taste.... Problem is with men...! They want FRUIT SALAD..!! - UnitedDj.com

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colgate" se daant saaf krain "pepsodent" se mazboot krain ''closeup" se fresh krain or agar phir bhi white na hon to bina sharmae... . "HARPIC" use krainQ k "HARPIC" dy 5 guna zyada behtr safaaii...!!! - UnitedDj.com

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Santa Class Me Has Raha Tha 1 Ladki Boli STaND UP Koun Ho Tum?? Santa:Tum Koun Ho? Ladki: Mai MONITOR Hun. Santa: Ha.ha.. TeRE Din Gaye pagli ab laptop or LCD ka zamana hai. - UnitedDj.com

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Aaj Mene Ek Ladki Ko Request Send Ki Shaam Uska Messege Aaya: Sorry Main Unknown Ko Add Nahi Karti Maine Reply Kiya: Jo Pehle Se 982 Friends Add Kiye Hai, Tu Un Sab Ki AUNTY Lagti Hai Kya Kamini..... - UnitedDj.com

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Son: Dad, what does 'gay' means Father: It means 'to be happy'. Son: Are you gay? Father: No, son. I have a wife. - UnitedDj.com

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ਅਮਲੀ ਆਪਣੀ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ ਨੂੰ " ਜੇ ਮੇਰੀ lottery ਨਿਕਲੇ ਤੇ ਤੂੰ ਕੀ ਕਰੇਗੀ " " ਘਰਵਾਲੀ " ਮੈ ਅੱਧੇ ਪੈਸੇ ਲੇਕੇ ਤੈਨੂੰ ਛੱਡ ਕੇ ਚਲੀ ਜਾਵਾਗੀ. " " ਅਮਲੀ ਮੇਰੀ 50 ਰੁਪੇ ਦੀ lottery ਨਿਕਲੀ " " ਲੈ ਫੜ ਪੰਜੀ ਰੁਪੇ ਤੇ ਦਫ਼ਾ ਹੋਜਾ ". - UnitedDj.com

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1 bus me 1 aunty khadi thi.. 1 bache ne kaha ki aap meri jagah beth jaao.. Aunti ne use thappad mar diya kyu.. ?? Kyu ki bacha apne PAPA ki god me betha hua tha.. - UnitedDj.com

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Santa ne Ghar ka Darwaza ukhada or kandhe pe rakh k Bazar me gya 1 Admi ne poucha: o paaji,Kya Drwaza Bechna h? Santa:Nhi Tala Khulwana hai Chabi gum ho gye hai. Hanso mat Joke abhi aage hai Admi santa se: Agar ghar mai chor ghus gye to..? Santa: Andar kese jayega drwaza to mere pas hai - UnitedDj.com

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Jab Se India Mein "Facebook"Aaya hai.. Bahot sari Changes Hui hai.. 1. Sadko Pe Jahgda Bandh, Ab Pages Pe Gali Galonch Hoti hai.. 2. Couples Garden Chhod ke FB inbox Mein Milte hai.. And Smiles Kisses Replaced by Emotions..Muwaahhh3. Ab Politcals Social Issues facebook Pe Aa gaye.. 4. Ladke Ab Nukkadh Pe Nahi, Pages Pe Ladkiyan Chedte hai... JAI HO.. FACEBOOK Padhega India, Tab Hi Toh Badhega India..:p - UnitedDj.com

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Sabse jyada gussa kab aata hai..??? Jab aapka teacher bole ki maikal class test lungi aur next day jab wo test lena bhool jaye, Aur class ka koi baccha bol de.. Sir ! Aaj test nahi loge kya..??? :p >:O :D - UnitedDj.com

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ladki: mummy mummy ye padosi ka ladka mujhe bar bar kiss kr k bhag jata hai ? Mummy: muskurai aur boli bahut shararti hai bilkul apne baap pe gya hai.. - UnitedDj.com

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Kamwali: Malkin, apki purani sareeya mujhe nhi chahiye.. Malkin: Kyu? Kamwali: Apki saree pahen-ne k baad saheb"ap" samajh kr mere paas bhi nhi ate! - UnitedDj.com

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mota marta moti pr bhuka marta roti pr master ji ki do batiyan par mai to marta hu choti pr - UnitedDj.com

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Bacha Ghar Se Maar Kha kr, Gusse Me School Ja Raha Tha Ek admi Ne Pucha Beta Padhte Ho? Bacha: Nhi School Ki Dress Pehen K Tere Baap K Barat Mai Ja Raha Hu. - UnitedDj.com

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Ladki Deo laga ke Bus pe chadhi, Ladke ne comment paas kiya Aj kal Phinayal ka Use zyada hota hai' Ladki boli: 'Fir bhi makkhiya pichha nhi chhodte' - UnitedDj.com

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99 sal ka aadmi SWARG ki raunak aur sundar apsarao ko dekh kar bola- Ye Ramdev baba k chakr me na para hota to 30 sal pahle hi chala ata... - UnitedDj.com

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Wife Bathroom Se Naha Ke Nikli To Santa Use Ghur Raha Tha! Wife Romantic Hokar: Kuch Karne Ka Irada Hai Kya? Santa 2 Thappad Maar Ke Bola: Mere Garm Pani Se Kyu Nahayi!! - UnitedDj.com

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LIP'STICK lagaana LADKI ki BEAUTY hai., "Waah waah" LIP'STICK lagaana LADKI ki BEAUTY hai., "Wah wah" Aur Usey TASTE karna LADKO ki DUTY hai.. - UnitedDj.com

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Teacher:" What Is The Difference Between HIMAMI & SUNAMI..??? Pappu:" HIMAMI is Face Wash,SUNAMI is Total Wash.. :p :D - UnitedDj.com

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Justin Bieber bar mei beer peene aaya 9 bottles peeney ke baad Waiter :"Aap ko chadhti kyu nahi ??? Justin Bieber :"Mai mard hun isliye mujhe nhi chadti Waiter :"Hahaha chadh gayi saale ko :D :p - UnitedDj.com

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3 boys proposed a girl 1st:" Mai tmhare lye apni jaan de skta hu. Girl:" Wo to sab kehte hain.. 2nd:" Mai tmhare liye chand tare tor kar la sakta hu.. Girl:" Purana dailouge hai. 3rd:" Main tumhari ACTIVA me Roz 1.ltr Petrol dalwaunga Girl:" Ankho me ansu k sath Pagal itna chahta hai mujhe...:p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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Aashiqui 3 Song Tu hi yeh mujhko bta de facebook chalau main ya naa. Apne tu ghar ka pata de, aaau main yaa naaa. Apna tu phone number bta de, Call lagau main yaa naaaaaaaa. . Khaana tu rakh de paka ke, khau main yaaa na. Itna bata de mujhko kab milne aau tujhko... Ab hota nhi intizaaaar tu hi ye mjhko bata de koi dusri patau main yaa naaaaaa. Girls, i m wa8ing dusri ptau mei b ya na? - UnitedDj.com

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I hate the facebook layout. Mene aaj See more pe click kiya aur..Mujhe koi Peacock nahi dikha.! - UnitedDj.com

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WhatsApp killed SMS! YouTube killed DVD! Skype killed ISD calls! Amazon killed real life shopping and Facebook killed LIFE. - UnitedDj.com

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WhatsApp killed SMS! YouTube killed DVD! Skype killed ISD calls! Amazon killed real life shopping and Facebook killed LIFE. - UnitedDj.com

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Positive Attitude.. Hum Wo Hai Jo 'Haar' K Bhi Ye Kehte He. "Wo Manzil Hi Badnaseeb Thi Jo Hame Na Paa Saki.. Tabhi Piche Se Awaz Ayi, 'Besharmi Ki Bi Haad Hoti H' - UnitedDj.com

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Maine darwaza khola to uski ankho me ansu, chehre par hansi thi, Sason me aahen, dil me bebasi thi, Pagli ne pehle nahi bataya ki Darwaze me uski ungli fasi thi...: - UnitedDj.com

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Pappu ki master se hui ladai Master ne ki Pappu ki dhulai Pappu ka garam hua khoon Gaya kabristan ar kabar pe master ke photo tang k likh diya COMING SOON :D :p :o - UnitedDj.com

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Gabbar:- Kitne Admi the? Sambha:- Srkr 2.Gabbar:- Mujhe ginti nahi ati, 2 kitne hote he?? Smb:- 2 1 ke Baad ata he. Gabbr:- To bich me kaun ata he? Gab:- To fir Dono ek sath Q nahi ate? Smb:- 2 1 k bad hi aa sakta he Qki 2 1 se bada he Gab:- 2 1 se Kitna bada he? Samba:- ullu k patthey, kaminey goli marni h to mar de tera namak khaya hai, chavananprash nahi. - UnitedDj.com

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