Jiss marji ladke se pucho lo aap Wo single he kehega.. . . . Aur jiss marji ladki se puchlo wo kehegi i have bf . . Mujhe to yeh samaj nai aa raha k . . . Agar sare boys single hai to ladkiya kya bandro se set hone lag gyi ?? Ladki Se Police Ne Poocha: Tum Ne car se 50 Aadmi Q Maare...?? . . Ladki: Ji Main 60 Ki Speed Se Car Chala Rahi Thi, Achanak Pata Laga K Break Kaam Nahi Kar Rahi.............. Ab Mere Ek Taraf 2 Aadmi Ja Rahe The Or Ek Taraf Baraat, Mai Kise Maarti...?? . . Police: 2 Aadmiyon Ko Maarti,TaaKi Nuksan Kam Hota . . LARKI: Ji MeinE ne bhi ye hi Kiya Tha, . . . Per Ek Aadmi to niche aa gaya aur dusra Baraat Ki Taraf Bhaaga to kya krti.. 1000 pages ki book kitne din me padhi ja sakti hai, . . WRITER:" 6 months.. . . DOCTOR:" 2 months.. . LAWYER:" 1 month.. . . Engineer student:" ye batao exam kab hai.. raat bhar mein nipta denge.. - Uniteddj.com Jab class hum boys hasi - majaak kare tab hamare sir ka reaction . . "kya hai..kyun itni jyaadahasi aa rahi hai... koi joke yad aa gaya kya..?? GET OUT tumhari attendance nahi lagegi" :? . . Aur jab LADKIYA hass rahi ho tab:"Arey wah kya baate ho rahi hain aaj....?? kyun itna hass rahi ho...?? Zara humein bhi toh bataiye.. - Uniteddj.com Ek Aurat hath mai Hathoda le k apne Bete k college gai aur boli, "Kahna hai mere Bete ki class?" Principal: "Bhenji, shanti Rakhe, baat kya hai?" Aurat: "Aaj 5 din ho gaye mere Bete ki 5 chaddiyan phat gyi h.. . . . Aaj to main us ki . . Bench ki Keel thok k hi jauangi" - Uniteddj.com

25 Saal Ho Gaye Pr, Abhi Tak 3 Cheeze Bilkul Nhi Badli ! . . Parle-G Biscuit Wala ladka abhi tak bada nahi... Amul butter wali ladki abhi tak badi nahi huhi or MDH masala wala Buddha ab tak mara ni..! - Uniteddj.com Once Rajnikant forgot his toys in America when he was small ... . . . . Now that place is known as "Disney Land" Solid dhamki by papu to santa Tufano se pange lena par mujhse nahi Tufano se pange lena par mujhse nahi .Kyuki . . Jin tufano me akshar logo k ghar udh jaya karte hai un tufano me main apni chaddi sukhaya krta hu Bjao taliya papu k lye - Uniteddj.com In india.. on a bus stand... at a book stall.. : : an american engineer got heart attack.. : becoz.. : : : : he saw a book : "how to become an engineer in 15 days" worth rs. 15.. - Uniteddj.com Nobody in the world can stop u from falling in love.... . . But...??? 2 Powerful weapons can do that.. . . Mummy's Chappal Daddy's Belt Exclusively Made in India.. - Uniteddj.com He : Hi , what's your name? . . She : Asha . . He : But you're not small . . She : what? . . . He : Dil hai chota sa , choti si asha !! *Blocked* - Uniteddj.com

The pain of missing friends is realized whn . . . . . . . . . U r standing some where nd see a group of friends having fun U smile nd say to urself 'HUM BHI KABHI AISE HI KRTE THE' agree frnds ab ek like un bite lamho k lye toh banta h boss ... - Uniteddj.com Sir:" Akbar kaun tha ?? . . Pappu:" Pata nahin.. . . SIR:" Padhai ki taraf dhyan do.. . . . . Pappu:" Sir, Love, Pankaj, Avinash, kaun hai ?? . . SIR:" Pata nahi.. . . . . Pappu:" Apni beti ki taraf dhyan dijiye.. Teacher Shocked... Pappu Rocked.. - Uniteddj.com Pappu apne baap k samne cigrate pee rha tha . Mummy- nalayak ! Papa k samne cigrate pee rha hai ? . . . . . . . . . Pappu - to phir kya ho gya , Baapu hi hai na . koi Petrol pump to nahi jo aag lag jayegi... - UnitedDj.com G.f - kya bat h aj kal meri yad ni ati.. . . . . . . . . . . . B.f - jb se fb chalana suru kiya ,rat ki khayi hui sbzi yad ni rhti ,tu kya ghanta yad rhegi.. - Uniteddj.com BRAIN BUSTER.. . . If You Think You Know English Better, .. Here Is Your Test.. . . Apart From " BREAK " Write Any Other English Word That Starts With 'B' And Ends With 'K'.. .. Warning ! : DO NOT USE DICTIONARY.. .. Your Time Starts NOW !! - Uniteddj.com Husband (jalane k liye) . . . Kal mere khawab me ek larki aai thi, Wah kya larki thi . . Wife: “Akeli aayi hogi.?? . . Husband: “Tum ko kaise pata.?? . . Wife: “Uska husband mere khwabme aaya tha . . Husband Shocked Wife Rockedv:)

Ladki apne Boyfriend ko naraz karne ke baad, SMS pe kaise manati hai.. . . 1st Hour:" Sorry 2nd Hour:" Sorry plzz.. 3rd Hour:" Plzz 1 baar baat karlo.. 4th Hour:" Plzz reply jaan… 5th Hour:" Plzzz itna naraz mat ho.. 6th Hour:" I’m sorry, I’ll die agar tumne baat nahi ki.. 7th Hour:" Dafa ho, 100 ladke ghumte hai tere jaise..Sar pe hi chadha jaa rha hai,bhaad me jaa..v .. Boy:" Sorry Dear, balance nahi tha.. .. Girl:" Ohh.. Its okkk love u jaan.. - Uniteddj.com

Pappu chemist ki shop pe 1 bottle le k gaya aur ek chamach liquid dukandaar ko pila k bola:- mitha hai Kya? . . Dukandar bola- nahi, kyu kya h ye? . . . Pappu : - docter ne Bola chemist ki shop se 'urine' me sugar check karwa k aao...! Wo check krwane aya tha. - Uniteddj.com

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Pappu China Ke Tour Pe GayaTha Waha Usne Ek X-Ray Chashma Liya.. . Chashma Lagane Se Har Koi Nanga Nazar Aata Tha, . Pappu Ghar Aaya To Preeto Ko Apne Ek Dost Ke Sath Apne Bed Pe Nanga Dekha, . . Usne Foran Chashme Ko Utara, Phir Bhi Dono Nange Nazar Aaye, . pappu Gusse Se Chashma Fenkta Hua Bola: “Ye Hi Musibat Hai China Ke Saman Ki, Koi Garranty Nahi Hoti Jaldi Kharab Ho Jati Hai“ - Uniteddj.com

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Ek Student Ko Apni Life Mein, Khud Par Sabse Zyada Proud Kab Hota Hai ? . . Jab Usko Exam Mein Kuch Na Aata Ho, Aur Pichhe Se Teacher Aake Kahe,v ? ? Copy Chhupa Lo Pichhe Wala Dekh Raha Hai.... .. Kasam se Seena Kushi se Chauda Ho Jaata Hai..... - Uniteddj.com

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GF- Tumhe Meri Yaad Aati Hai To Kya Karte Ho ?? . . . BF - Main Tumhari Pasand Ki Chocolate Kha Letaa Hu.. . Aur Tum Kya Karti Ho ??? . . . . . . GF - Main Bhi Ek Gold Flake Pee Leti Hu... - Uniteddj.com

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Facebook Pe Kisi Ladki ko Hello Hi..Karne Se Accha.. . . . . . . . Kisi Kutte Ko Patthar Maar lo... .. Atleast Dhang Se Reply To Karta Hai.!! - Uniteddj.com

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18 Year Old Boy : Will You Be My GF...??? . 18 Year Old Girl : No, Get Lost... . . 5 Year Old Boy : Will You Be My GF...??? . 18 Year Old Girl : Awwwwwww So Sweet... Yes Yes, I Will... . . Hey Bhagwan,v Jiske Muh Me Daant Nahi Usiko Khana Kyo Dete Ho...... - UnitedDj.com

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Boss- Mere liye ak shisha lekar aao jisme main apna muh dekh sakun.. . . Santa- nahi mila sir.! Sab me mera hi muh dikh raha hai.. .. Inteligent Santa - UnitedDj.com

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1 train me Aishwarya without ticket travel kr rahi thi.. . Usne saree pehni thi.. T.T. Ne usse 100 rs fine liye.. & Katrina ne jeans pehni thi, usse 75 rs fine liye.. . & . Karina ne skirt pehni thi, usse 50 rs fine liye.. . . Par Sunny Leone se kuch nai liya.. . Why.. ?? . . socho . . Kyoki .. Uske pas ticket tha ..... - Uniteddj.com

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The fast and furious moment of childhood... . . . . When guests go out of the house And u run like a rocket to eat the things that served for them... - UnitedDj.com

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Dadaji: Beta zara mere daant lana . Pota: Lekin abhi roti to paki nahi hai . . . . . Dadaji: Abe, Roti ko mar goli samne wali budiya smile de rahi hai - Uniteddj.com

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Dimag ka Dahi wala JoKe . . . santa Nepali Se - Tum American Ho? .. .. .. Nepali- Nahi Me Nepal Ka H . santa- Nahi Tum Amrican Ho . . Nepali- Nahi Bhai Main Nepal Ka Hu.. . . santa- Nahi Tum Amrican Ho . . Nepali (Gusse Me)- Ha Me American hu... . . santa- Lagte To Nepali Ho - Uniteddj.com

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To all girls who die for 'size zero' & to all boys who wanna such a girl as a Gf : . . . 'Real man” goes for curves.. Haddiyo pe to kutte marte hai..! - Uniteddj.com

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Sunny Deol ke "GADAR-2" banaane ke announcement ke baad ......... Pakistan ne . . . . apne sabhi Handpumps ki suraksha badha di hai - UNiteddj.com

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Husband- Agar mujhe lottery lagi toh tum kya karogi...? : : : Wife- Aadhe paise le kar Hamesha keliye mayke chali jaungi... Main bhi khush aur aap bhi khush.. : : : Husband- 20 Rs. ki lagi hai... ye le 10 aur nikal.. - UNIteddj.com

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Pappu: “Pichhle Hafte Meri Aur Meri Girlfriend Ki Ladai Ho Gayi Thi Aur Hum Alag Ho Gaye” . Golu: “Phir?” . Pappu: “Usne Mujhe Chidhane Ke Liye Apne Naye Boyfriend Ke Sath Photo Khinchva Ke Mujhe Bhej Di”:( . Golu: “Ohh, Ye To Bahot BuraKiya Usne” . Pappu: “To Main Bhi Konsa Kam Hu, Utha Ke Photo Uske Baap Ko Bhej Di...!!!! ... lele abmaze - UnitedDj.com

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Gabbar: Kitne Admi the? Sambha: Sarkar 2.. .. Gabbar: Mujhe ginti nahi ati, 2 kitne hote hai?? Sambha: 2 1 ke Baad aata hai. .. Gabbr: aur 2 k pehle?? Sambha: 2 k pehle 1 aata hai. .. Gabbar: To beech me kaun aata hai? Sambha: Beech mein koi nahi aata. .. Gabbar: To fir Dono ek sath kyu nahi aate? Sambha: 2 1 k baad hi aa sakta he kyuki 2 1 se bada hai. .. Gabbar: 2 1 se Kitna bada hai? Samba: Abey Goli marni hai toh mar de, tera namak khaya hai, CHAVANPRASH nahi.. - Uniteddj.com

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Latest Double Meaning Jokes of 2013 (For Read Click on Link ) - Uniteddj.com

Latest Double Meaning Jokes of 2013

Dirty and Adult jokes of 2013 Latest (For Reading the Jokes Click on link ) - Uniteddj.com

Latest Dirty and Adult Jokes of 2013

Kaminapan bhi jaroori hai. .. . . Boy:" hey, i love u, meri gf banogi.. ?? . . . Grl:" hmmmm! Apna numbr de do, . . jab current bf se break-up hoga to miss call kar dungi.. - uniteddj.com

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" Pappu " ਜੋਕੀ ਦਾ underwear ਲਿਆਇਆ " " ਤੇ ਸਾਰੇ ਪਿੰਡ ਵਿਚ ਆਪਣੀ ਧੋਤੀ ਚਕ ਚਕ ਕੇ ਵਿਖਾਵੇ " " " ਘਰ ਆਇਆ ਤੇ ਅਲਮਾਰੀ ਖੋਲੀ " ਤੇ ਬੇਹੋਸ਼ ਹੋਗਿਆ " " ਕਿਓਕੀ " " " " " " " " underwear ਅਲਮਾਰੀ ਵਿਚ ਹੀ ਰਿਹ ਗਿਆ ਸੀ " __ - Uniteddj.com

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PM to Secretary:" Jab se me PM Bana Hu Meri Maa ko Hichki BahutAati Hai.. . . . . Secretary:" Actualy Sir, . . . Petrol ke daam badhne se Log Aapki Maa Ko Bahut Yaad Karte Hai... Hahahhaha ,,,,, - UNiteddj.com

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ਉਹ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਮੇਨੂੰ ਤਾ Honey Singh ਵਦੀਆਂ ਲਗਦਾਂ! ਮੈ ਕਿਹਾ ਔਹ ਤਾ ਤੈਨੂੰ ਵਦੀਆਂ ਲਗਣਾ ਹੀ ਆਂ ਤੇਰੀ ਮਾਂ ਭੈਣ ਜੋ ਇਕ ਕਰਦਾ,,,, - Uniteddj.com

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Latest Dirty And Adult Jokes of 2013 (for Read the Jokes click on link ))

Dirty and Adlut JOkes of 2013

Best profession. .. Shadi Me Photografer Banne Ka Kuch Aur Hi Maza Hai, Ladkiyan:: Meri Lo Na, Meri Akeli Ki Lo, Ye Meri Frnd Hai, Hum Dono Ki Sath Me Lo. Khade Khade Lena. - Uniteddj.com

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Ladki Ki Shaadi Me Uska Puraana BOYFRIEND Bhi Aaya Tha ...... . . . Sabhi Ne Us Se Poochha: Kya Aap Hi Dulhe Ho........... . . . . . . Boyfriend : Nahi Main To Semi Final Mein OUT Ho Gaya tha.. . . . Final Dekhne Aaya Hu - Uniteddj.com

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Ek chuha sharab k drum me gir gaya, . . . . . bahar nikal kar mast hokar sath mai soye hui Billi ki puchh pe pao rakh kr bola:" . . . . . UTH MUNNI, CHULBUL PANDEY TERA DANCE DEKHNE AAYA HAI" - Uniteddj.com

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Hubby Ke B'day Par Wife Ne Pucha:" Kya Gift Dun ??? . . Hubby:" Tum mujhe Pyar Karo , Izzat Karo aur Mera Kehna Maano... Yahi kaafi hai...!! . . . . . Wife:" (Kuch Der Soch Ke) Nahi Main To Gift Hi Dungi.. - Uniteddj.com

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Engineering student sitting with his Girlfrnd in Restaurant Drinking BEER and says:" I Love yOuuu Girlfrnd:" is it yOu Or the BEER talking ?? . . . . Student:" its me, Talking tO my BEER, yOu Shut up.. - Uniteddj.com

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Ek Bhikhari: "Arey yaar ! Koi meri CYCLE chura le gaya aur apni BIKE yahan rakh gaya.......... . . Dusra Bhikhari:" Abe tu to Loott gaya yaar ! . . . Ye to PETROL se chalti hai.. - uniteddj.com

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Truth... Ladkiyo ki Shakal itni buri nahi hoti jitni unke Voter-Id-Card me hoti hai.. . . . . . . . . Aur itni sunder bhi nahi hoti jitni Facebook ki profile me hoti hai.. - uniteddj.com

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Santa- Kal meri shadi hai aur ladki walo ne kam log bulaye hai. . . . . Banta- To isme prob kya hai? . . . . . . . . . Santa-pata nhi papa mujhe le jaynge ya nhi.. - Uniteddj.com

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GF: Where R u ... ?? . . PAPPU: I'm At "Bank" . . GF: I Need 30,000 F or New Cell Phone & 10,000 For New Mini Skirts. . . . . PAPPU: Sorry, I Mean I'm At ' Blood Bank ' "KHOON PIYEGI KHOON"... ?? - Uniteddj.com

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Pappu: “Pichhle Hafte Meri Aur Meri Girlfriend Ki Ladai Ho Gayi Thi Aur Hum Alag Ho Gaye” . Golu: “Phir?” . Pappu: “Usne Mujhe ChidhaneKe Liye Apne Naye Boyfriend Ke Sath Photo Khinchva Ke Mujhe Bhej Di” . Golu: “Ohh, Ye To Bahot Bura Kiya Usne” . Pappu: “To Main Bhi Konsa Kam Hu, Utha Ke Photo Uske Baap Ko Bhej Di...!!! - Uniteddj.com

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Aajkal Ladkiyo k college bag me copy kitaab ki jaga kya kya samaan milega.. ?? . . EK kanghi.. . . Ek perfume ki chhoti sisi.. . . Ek facial cream.. Ek eye brow set karne wali kanghi.. Lakme moisturizer.. 3-4 rumaal.. Lakme compact Lakme kajal Ek chhota sa sisa.. Balo mai lagane wale 3-4 pin.. . . Class mai bhi makeup karti hai aur Fir bolti hai boys hame ghoorte kyun rehte hai Ab hum Kya Karen - Uniteddj.com

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B F: i want 2 kiss u GF:no!! pregnant ho jaungi . . . . . . BF: kiss se pregnant !! GF: Kyunki mai jab ek baar shuru hoti hoon.. . phir mai khud ki bhi nhi sunti.....Lolzzz - Uniteddj.com

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History Ki Teacher Ne Pappu Ko Khada Kiya Aur Sawal Puchha.... Teacher: “ Batao Ganga Kahan Se Nikalti Hai Aur Kaha Ja Ke Milti Hai??? ” Pappu: “ Madam, Ganga School Ke Bahane Ghar Se Nikalti Hai Aur Mandir Ke Piche Veet Se Jaakar Milti Hai.” - Uniteddj.com

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Dil diya tha mohabat ki nishani samajh kar, Woh khaa gya usey biryani samajh kar, Khoon-e-jigar bhi na chora zalim ne, Woh bhi pee gya leemo paani samajh kar.! - Uniteddj.com

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Macchar ne jo kata… dil main mere junoon tha. Khujli hui itni… dil be sukoon tha. Pakada to chod diya yeh soch kar ki….sale ki ragon main apna hi khoon tha ! - Uniteddj.com

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Dosti ka hr frz hum jante hai, tumhare har dard ki dava hum jante hain. Humein bhulne ki kabhi koshish bhi mat karna kyunki hum gala dabana bhi jante hain - Uniteddj.com

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Likho to paigam kuch aisa likho ki kalam bhi rone ko majbur ho gaye… Har lafz me dard itna bhar do ki examiner bhi pass karne ko majbur ho jaye…. - Uniteddj.com

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Ab jab gira baadal, teri yaad ai, Jhoom ke barsa saawan, teri yaad ai, Bheega main, lekin phir bhi teri yaad ai, Kiyun na aey teri yaad? Tune jo chhatri ab tak nahi lautai… - Uniteddj.com

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During exam:" . . Yeh bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . . . . . . . . . . . . In Result:" yeh kyaa ho gaya... - Uniteddj.com

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Hus & wife Talaaq k baad Hus:Bacha mera hay Wife:Waah Jee Waah..! Bartan mera Doodh mera Thora sa Khata kia daal diya poora Dahi tera? - Uniteddj.com

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Biwi shohar se: aaj ap daftar se jaldi kese aa gae? Shohr: achanak mere boss ko gusa aa gaya or bola jahanum mein jao, to me foran utha or tumhare pas chala aya…. - Uniteddj.com

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Hus & wife Talaaq k baad Hus:Bacha mera hay Wife:Waah Jee Waah..! Bartan mera Doodh mera Thora sa Khata kia daal diya poora Dahi tera? … - Uniteddj.com

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Apne chare se ruswaie ka ERROR to hataho, Ab bohat ho gaya apne dil ka PASSWORD to bataho, Axser raat ko app mere sapne mein aatein hain, Mere pyar ko MOUSE banake englio pe nachate hain, Or tere pyar ka E-MAIL mere dil ko labhata hai, Beach mein tera baap VIRUS banke aa jaata hai. [...] - Uniteddj.com

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Lady drinking coke, machhar falls in. Lady takes it out, machhar says MAA! Lady asks why did you call me MAA? machhar says, Main teri coke se nikla hoon, MAA! - Uniteddj.com

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It was written on an old man’s T-shirt: . . . “I am not 60″ . . . . “I am 18 with 42 years of . . . . experience” . . . That’s Attitude . . . . Think Different - Uniteddj.com

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oh kehndi Ke jiniya Mere kol "NAIL PAINT" va ohne tere kol "kapdE" ni Hone ,, Main Keha ta Jine Mere YAAR aw na,, oone Tere "RISHTEDAAR" ni Hone - Uniteddj.com

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ਘਰਵਾਲੀ = ਜੇ ਮੈ ਗਵਾਚ ਗਈ ਤੁਸੀਂ ਕੀ ਕਰੋ ਗੇ ਘਰਵਾਲਾ = ਅਖਬਾਰ ਵਿਚ ਇਸ਼ਤਿਆਰ ਦਵਾਗਾ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ = ਖੁਸ਼ ਹੋਕੇ ਵਾਓ " ਕੀ ਇਸ਼ਤਿਆਰ ਦਵੋਗੇ . . . . . . . . . ਘਰਵਾਲਾ = ਜਿੰਨੇ ਲੱਭ ਲਈ ਉਹਦੀ...,,,,, - Uniteddj.com

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Gadha(Donkey) - Mera Maalik Bahot Marta Hai Yaar.. . . Dog - To Tu Bhag Jaa. . . Gadha :- Nahi Yaar... . Dog : Lekin Kyo ? . Gadha : Uski Ladki Jab Padhayi Nahi Karti To Wo Kehta Hai Ki Teri SHADI Gadhe Se Kara Dunga . Bas Isi UMMEED Pe Tika Hu.....! - Uniteddj.com

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Girl :ap mujhe lift denge to mainapko apna cell no. dungi...... ...Boy : Jahan chaho wahan chhor dunga, Numbr vmbr rehne do, Bas 100 ka petrol dalwa dena baji. Uffff "Mehangai ne ladko ko bhishareef bana diya hai " - Uniteddj.com

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Do Ladkiyaan Train Mein Safar Kar Rahi Thi, Ek Ladki Ne Time Pass Ke Liye Dusri Se Puchha Ladki: “Tujhe Kaisa Pati Chahiye?” Dusri: “Mujhe Crorepati Chahiye” Pahli: “Crorepati Na Mile To?” Dusri: “50 Lakh Ke 2 Pati Chalenge” Pahli: “50 Lakh Ke Na Mile To?” Dusri: “25 Lakh Ke 4 Pati Bhi Chalenge” Uppar Birth Pe Lete Hue Santa Ne Ye Suna Aur Bola. Santa: “Jab Ye 1000 Rupaye Pe Aaye To Mujhe Bata Dena“ - Uniteddj.com

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Satsang me baba Ramdev bole: aaj ki auratein itne jaleel kapde pehanti hain k sab nazar aata hai.. Unki kameez nazar aati hai, Unki taange nazar aati hain, Unka jism nazar aata hai, Khula ang-pardarshan hota hai... Peeche se Santa ki awaz aayi, " "Baba ji aap parvachan do..mood mat banao raat ko need nahi aayegi=D=)) - Uniteddj.com

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Bush:" Osama mile toh use fod do.. Gandhi:" Hinsa achi baat nhi, use chod do.. Einstein:" Samay rukta nhi, to use mod do.. Manmohan:" theek hai" Sonia:" desh k liye mujhe vote do.. Arnold Schwarzenegger:" Biceps build karne k liye uspar load do.. Bill Gates:" Windows unlock karne k liye use code do! Rajnikanth:" oye admin ! mere kaarname duniya k samne lana chhod do And d best 1 . . . ACP Praduman:" Daya, khooni andar hai main kehta hu darwaza tod do.. - Uniteddj.com

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Husband :- " Kamar Me Bahot Dard Hai.. . Baaju Ke Ghar Se IODEX Le Aao.. . . . . Wife :- "Wo Nahi Denge... . . . . . . . . Husband :- "Kitne Kanjoos Hai Saaale, . . . . . . . . Jaane Do, Apna Hi Nikal Lo, Almaari Me Rakha Hai... - Uniteddj.com

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Din raat msg kar kar k aisa kar dia tum logon ne muje Zalimo.. . . . Ghar ki ghanti bajne pr b mobile utha leta hoon.. - uniteddj.com

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Me:" I love you.. . Girl:" Shutup.. . Me:" I Like you.. . Girl:" Shutup.. . Me:" I Miss you.. . Girl:" Shutup.. . . . Me:" you are really pretty !! . . Girl:" Really ?? . . . . Me:" SHUTUP.... :p :o ;p - uniteddj.com

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Kamina Dost:" Extreame level . Ek baar do dost the .. chalte chalte unhe ek chiraag mila.. . Use ghisa to usme se jin nikla.. . jin bola:" Hukum mere aaka..!! mein tum dono ki 3 wishes poori karunga.. 1st dost:" meri colony ki saari ladkiyo ko meri GF bana do.. 2nd dost:" mujhe ek Helmet chahiye.. 1st dost:" bagal wali colony ki saari ladkiyo ko bhi meri GF bana do.. . . 2nd dost:" mujhe ek bike aur chahiye.. . 1st dost:" ek pure city ki ladkiyo ko meri GF bana do.. . . (U will surely love this ) 2nd dost:" Ab ise "Gay" bana do.. - Uniteddj.com

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In india. . on a bus stand.. . at a book stall.. : : an american engineer got heart attack.. : becoz.. : : : : he saw a book : "how to become an engineer in 15 days" worth rs. 15.. - Uniteddj.com

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Wife apne Husband se boli:" Dekho Ji , Kaam karte Waqt mere ko Kiss-Wiss na kiya karo.. . . . . . . Tabhi Kaamwali Bai Boli:" Madam Ji, Achhi Tarah se Samjha do, Main to bol-bol ke Thak Gayi... Wife Shocked.. - UnitedDj.com

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Profeser : Agar tumhare paas 2 option ho ke tum kiske sath sona pasand karoge? . 20 saal ki larki ya tumse 20 saal bari aurat ?? . . . . . . . . Papu : Sir Depend karta hai ki kaun jyada khubsurat hai, ApkiBeti ya apki Bivi... . Proffesor shocked Papu Rocked m/ - UnitedDj.com

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ਉਹ _ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ _ ਲੜਨ _ ਨਾਲ _ਪਿਆਰ _ਵਧਦਾ . . . . . . . . ਇਹ _ ਸੁਣ _ ਕੇ _ ਮੈ _ ਓਹਦੀ _ ਅੱਖ _ 'ਤੇ ਮੁਕਾ _ ਮਾਰ _ਕੇ _ ਭੱਜ _ ਗਿਆ - UnitedDj.com

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Army Training k doran 1 officer ne sipahi se pocha: Ye hath me kia hai? . . Sipahi santa: Sir Ye bandooq hai. . . Officer: Ye bandooq nhi tumhari izzat or shan hai,tumhari maa hai maa!! . . Then Officer to a sipahi banta Singh: Tumhare hath me ye kya hai? . . Banta: Sir, Ye santa ki maa hai or hamari aunty hai.. !! :D:D - UnitedDj.com

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Chicken Aise Pakao Ke Kacha Na Ho, Wah Wah…. . . Chicken Aise Pakao Ke Kaccha Na Ho, . . . . Aur Mohabbat Aise Nibhao Ke Bacha Na Ho... . - Uniteddj.com

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English ਸਕੂਲ ਦੇ ਬੱਚੇ:- "Oh!!! Woww..look a doggy is sleeping. .lets not disturb" . . ਤੇ ਸਰਕਾਰੀ ਸਕੂਲ ਦੇ ਬੱਚੇ :- . . . . . . . "ਦੇਖ ਤੇਰਾ ਬੂੜਾ ਸੁੱਤਾ ਪਿਆ.. .ਰੋੜਾ ਮਾਰ ਸਾਲੇ ਦੇ" . - Uniteddj.com

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BF:" Tum Mujhe kitna pyar karti ho . . . . GF:" Arz Maarti hu.. . . Chaha Hai jise chahat se zyada . . Samja Hai jise khud se zyada . . Bharosa Hai jispe sabse zyada . . Tu hi Hai woh "HARAMZADA - Uniteddj.com

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Frnd k saath kro ya grlfrnd ksath, . . room me kro ya badroom me, . . bed par kro ya fir sofe pe, . . din me kro ya fir raat me, . . ground me karo ya garden me kro, . . aakhir exam me pass hone k liye padhai to karni padegi na... - Uniteddj.com

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ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਤੂ ਵੀ ਰਾਂਝੇ ਵਾਂਗ 12 ਸਾਲ ਸਾਡੀਆ ਮੱਝਾਂ ਚਾਰ ਸਕਦਾ . .. . ... ... . . .. . ਮੈਂ ਹੱਸ ਕੇ ਕੇਹਾ Biba ਤੇਨੁ ਰਾਂਝਾ ਚਹੀਦਾ ਕੇ ਰਾਮੂ - Uniteddj.com

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During exam:" . . Yeh bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho gaya . . Ye bhi ho . . In Result:" yeh kyaa ho gaya... - Uniteddj.com

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Height Of Good Luck..! . . Teacher: Stand up. Tell Me Two Pronouns...? . . . . . . . . . . . . . Student: Who..?? Me..?? .. Teacher: Very Good,Sit Down - Uniteddj.com

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DEAR BOYS Larkion ke Chakkar Me Mat Parna . . Dosto . . . Kyun ki . Ye Aati Hain HEER Ki Tarha Ye Aati Hain HEER Ki Tarha Lagti Hain KHEER Ki Tarha Lagti Hain KHEER Ki Tarha Chubhti Hain TEER Ki Tarha . . Or End Me Or End Me Halat Kar Deti Hain FAKEER Ki Tarha. : - Uniteddj.com

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Tata NANO ki neelami ho rahi thi . . Boli lagi.. 5 lakh 10 lakh 20 lakh . . Santa: Is sastey aur purane GaAdi me aisa kya hai bhai ? .. Seller: Is ke 12 accident hue hai, har bar sirf biwi mari hai. .. Santa: iski maa ki aankh ... 1 Crore ... - Uniteddj.com

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Height Of Double Meaning . . . . . . After Election PM Of India . . ManMohan Singh Said:" Yeh To Sonia G Ke Hath Ka Kamal Hai, . . Werna Is Umar Mein Mera Khada Hona Mushkil Tha.. - Uniteddj.com

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ਬਾਰੀ ਬਰਸੀ ਖੱਟਣ ਗਿਆ ਸੀ ਖੱਟ ਕੇ ਲਿਆਂਦਾ ਪੋਣਾ, ਫੋਟੋ ਮੇਰੀ ਵੇਖ ਕੇ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਤੂੰ ਮੁੰਡਾ ਬਾਹਲਾ ਸੋਹਣਾ ,ਜੱਦ ਕੀਤੇ ਮੈਂ 4-5 message ਕਹਿੰਦੀ,ਤੇਰੇ ਵਰਗਾ ਕੰਜਰ ਕੋਈ ਨੀ ਹੋਣਾ...... - Uniteddj.com

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LADY to tharki Baba-- mere pati roz aadhi raat ko kahin chale jate hain, aur subah tak vapas nahi aate. . . Baba: Sundari..! Ye "Samasya" hai yaa... "Amantran"..? - Uniteddj.com

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3 chor Billu, Sonu aur Santa, police se chhup k 3 boriyon me ghus gaye. Police wala aya, usne pehli bori me laat mari.. Billu bola, BOW-BOW.. Police wala- kutta hai- dusri bori me laat mari. . Sonu bola, MIAUU.. Police wala- billi hai.. Teesri bori me laat mari., koi awaz nai ayi.. Fir mari., koi awaz nai. . 20-25 laat mari to andar se Santa chillaya:- Abe haramkhor, AALOO kabhi bolta hai kya.. - Uniteddj.com

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Pappu:" bhagwan meri shadi katrina se kara do.._/_ . . Bhagwan:" Uski ek saree 1 lac ki hai, tu kharcha kar payega.. ?? . . . Pappu:" Koi upay bhagvan . . . Bhagvaan:" Mallika Sherawat.. - Uniteddj.com

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Only 842 girls are left for every 1000 boys in india SAVE GIRLS !!! .. we can save the tigers later, . . Bike pe piche ladki chahiye ya tiger ?? . . choice is yours.... Janhit Mein Jaari.... .. Bachcho..nari boht h jaroori.. - Uniteddj.com

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CHINA Cricket Kyon Nhi Khelta.? . . . . Kyonki TECHNICAL Problem Hae Sab Players Ka Face Ek Jaisa Hota Hai Jo Out Ho Gaya Wahi Muh Dhoke Phir Se Aa Skta hai... - uniteddj.com

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Ek ladki ne chote bacche k gaal par kiss kiya . Girl- Oh, sorry tumhare gaal pe lipstick lag gayi . . . . Baccha- kuch acha karne se agar daag lagte hai to daag ache hai - UnitedDj.com

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Pyar kabhi na karna pardesi se, Rote-Rote naina thak jayenge, Pyar karna ho to karo hamesha padosi se, Roz balcony se darshan to ho jayenge.. - UnitedDj.com

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Baharo ful barsao mera dost aaya hai, hotho pe muskan gali me mahak laya hai, barso tak thi jise pani se Elarzy.. wo aaj lux se nahaya hai! - UnitedDJ.com

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A child prayed to god, "plz give me a cycle" . But he didn't got any cycle. next day, he stole a ganesh statue & wrote letter to lord shiva . . . . . . . . Agar bacha chahiye to cycle lekar mandir aaja... - UnitedDj.com

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In 2020, ... . . BIKHARI : Bhagwan k naam pe kuch de de. ENGINEER : Ye le meri B.tech ki degree rakh le. . . . . . BIKHARI : Tujhe chahiye to meri M.tech ki rakhle ... !! - UnitedDj.com

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Fees maafi ke liye application To, The principal Sir, Baat ye hui k mere dad ne muje fees k liye Rs.500 diye the. 100 ki film dekhi, 150 ki drink, 50 ka Girlfriend ka Recharge karva diya, 200 science wali mam par shart haar gaya. Mai samajta tha k unka sirf Maths wale Sir k sath chakkar hai, par unka to aapke sath b chakkar nikla! Ab apke paas 2 hi raste he: Meri fees maaf ya Aapke raaz ka pardaafaash! Thanx Ur sincerely Apki beti ka boyfriend..!! - UnitedDj.com

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Ladka bola Dilruba:) Ladki boli Pizza khila:) . . Ladka bola Paise nhi . Ladki boli Aise kaise nhi Ladka bola Mahngai hai:| . . . Ladki boli Aaj se tu mera bhai hai - UnitedDj.com

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Boy: My Father's name is LAUGHING and my Mother's name is SMILING . . . . . . Teacher: You must be Kidding? . . . . . Boy: No, that's my brother. I am JOKING.. - UnitedDj.com

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Obama:" we have 3 item bombs . . Madonna, Shakira Angelina . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Manmohan:" we have professional bomb diffuser . . EMRAAN HASHMI.. - UnitedDj.com

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»» Which One Hurts Most To Lose: → 1. Phone → 2. Virginity → 3. Teeth → 4. Money → 5. Lover → 6. Trust → 7. Other(specify) - UnitedDj.com

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Likhe Jo Khat Tujhe, . . . . Wo teri yaad mein, . . . Saare Padh liye Papa ne raat me..!! . . . . Sawera Jab hua , toh Joote Pad gaye...!! . . . . Wo FANAA wale Baal GHAJNI me badal gaye...!! ...:X - UnitedDj.com

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Aaj Ke Bacche. . . . . . . . Postman knocked the Door.. . A Kid came wid cigrete in mouth & Beer in hand.. . Postman:" Papa hain.. ?? . . . Kid:"Abe Bhootni K, Mujhe Dekh Ke Lagta Hai Baap Ghar pe Hoga.. Kid RocKz - Postman shock

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GiRL : WHERE is my BiRTHDAY GiFT? Boy : ROAD pe RED COLOUR ki CAR DEKH rahi ho? GiRL KHUSHi se : WOW. .. .. .. .. .. . .. .. .. Boy : SAME COLOUR ki NAiL- POLiSH tere Liye Laya hoon... - UnitedDj.com

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Ek Budha Ek ladki se Takraya.... Budha: Sorry... Ladki: Andha hai kya..... Dikhta nah!! Jaise hi aage badhi, Ek handsome ladka us ladki se takra gaya... Ladka: Sorry... Ladki: It's okay!! Budha ladki se bolta hai "MERI SORRY KI SPELLING GALAT THI KYA??" - UnitedDj.com

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Snta-Ye Chhota Medal Tumhe Kyu Mila H? Bnta-Gane K Liye, Snta-Aur Ye Bada Wala? Bnta-Apna Gana Band Krne K Lie - UnitedDj.com

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Girl - ur name? boy- black lion G -r u joking? B - no, it means kaalu singh. and ur's girl- Soft underwear boy-r u joking? girl-no it means komal chadda. - UnitedDj.com

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Doctor: You must exercise daily for good health Pappu: I play football, cricket and tennis almost daily. . . Doctor: How long do you play? Pappu: Until the battery in my mobile dies down! :D :P v - UNitedDj.com

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Banta dairy likh raha tha "aaj meri behan ko baccha hone wala hai pata nahi ladka hoga ya ladki, isliye mujhe ye bhi pata nahi ki me . . . . mama banunga ya mami" :D :D - UnitedDJ.com

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Height of girl's Nakhre...!! Doctor: "kya hua hai aapko"?? . . . . . . . . . . Girl: "Hmmm... "Nazar lag gai hai.." :D - UnitedDj.com

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Girl:" Do you like me ?? . Boy:" No . . Girl got sad ...................... . Boy:" Why are you sad ?? . . Girl:" Coz u don't like me . . Boy:" U never asked "do you love me " ? . . Girl:" Awwww, ok do you love me??? . . . Boy:" No... :p :D - UnitedDj.com

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ek sharabi k haath JINN lag gaya Jinn:" koi 3 wishes mango Sharabi:" 1 daru ki bottle jo kabhi khatam na ho Jinn ne bottle pesh ki.... sharabi ne bottle milte hi peena shuru kiya.. Jaise hi last peg glass mein dala to bottle firse bhar gayi sharabi khush, phir peene laga... Jinn ne 2 aur wish mangne ko kaha sharabi Bahut khush ho ke bola:" . . . Aisi hi 2 bottle aur de de.. :p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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New joined in office... Me: Hi She: Hi Me: How are you doing? You looking great! She: I am fine. Thanks! Me: What's your name? She: ZOYA Me: Oh ZOYA!!!.... Ummmm...I have a meeting. Bye! She: meeting ? Suddenly? !! Me: yeah, I have seen Jannat, Ishqazaade and Ranjhana!!! :p :o :D - UnitedDj.com

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Different types of Girlfriend fighting with their boyfriend.. Pilot's Girlfriend : Zyada ud Matt Samjha Teacher's Girlfriend : Mujhe mat Sikhao Samjhe Dentist's Girlfriend : Daant tod ke hath me de dungi C.A.'S Girlfriend : Hisaab se reh samjha... Engineer's Girlfriend : . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . " Abey pehle Pass toh ho ja fir baat karna" :p - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਕੁੜੀ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਵਿੱਚ ਰੌਲਾ ਪਾ ਦਿਤਾ: ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ,ਜਲਦੀ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੋ _____ ਡਰਾਇਵਰ ਨੇ ਬੱਸ ਰੋਕੀ___ ਕੰਡਕਟਰ ਨੇ ਆ ਕੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ ਕੀ ਹੋਇਆ ??? . . . . ਕਹਿੰਦੀ ਟਿਕਟ ਬਾਹਰ ਉੱਡ ਗਈ ਜਿਸ ਤੇ 3 ਰੁਪਏ ਬਕਾਇਆ ਲਿਖਿਆ ਸੀ_____ ;) :D - UnitedDj.com

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ਝੰਡਾ ਅਮਲੀ ਗੱਡੀ ਤੇ ਜਾ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਰਸਤੇ ਵਿੱਚ ਪੁਲਿਸ ਦਾ ਨਾਕਾ ਲੱਗਿਆ ਹੋਇਆ ਸੀ... . . ਥਾਣੇਦਾਰ ਨੇ ਅਮਲੀ ਨੂੰ ਕਿਹਾ :- ਹਾਂ ਬਈ ਬੈਲਟ ਨੀ ਲਾਈ ? . . ਅਮਲੀ ਸੋਚ ਕੇ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ :- ਜਨਾਬ ਮੇਰੇ ਤਾ ਪਜਾਮਾ ਪਾਇਆ ਹੋਇਆ..... :P :D - UnitedDj.com

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PYAR TO 1 BAHANA HAI ankh mile na mile lips ko milana hai yehi style hai sab ASHIQON KA. Kya kare jan! Raj kapour ka nahi IMRAN HASHMI ka zmana ha. Read more: http://latestsms.in/sms-jokes.htm#ixzz2Y4rZL5dc

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santa 500 k note pr likha nmbr dial kr rha tha banta- ye tum kya kr rahe ho? yar me dekh raha hu gandhi ji to chale gaye par unka mobile kiske pas hai - UnitedDj.com

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Q: College Me Ladkiyon Ke Kitne Nam Hote Hai ? Ans:5 1.Meri Vali 2.Teri Vali 3.Teri Bhabhi 4.Meri Bhabhi Or Na Pate To 5.Kamini Saali. - UnitedDj.com

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Ladki:- mat kar mera picha 1 din pachtayega, bhar coleg k tu chole bhature ki shop lagayega..... Ladka:- tu mat thukra mere pyar ko, 1 din pachtayegi, usi chole ki shop pe bartan manjti nayar aayegi - UnitedDJ.com

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Daughter: Mom aaj Ek ladke ne mere gal pe kiss kiya. . . ....... Mom: Tune usko chata mara ya nahi. . . . . . Daughter: Mujhe achanak Gandhiji yaad agaye aur maine dusra gal agge kar diya........ - UnitedDj.com

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AMERICAN LIFE STYLE . . . DAUGHTER:"Sorry Dad, I got married yesterday.. Forgot to invite you.. . DAD:"U naughty.. It's Ok.. But Don't forget next Time... :P - UnitedDj.com

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Munda kudi de baap nu-"Mainu tuhadi kudi da hath chahida..". . . . . Kudi da baap -Naa "Saaleya main dass ethey kudi de SPARE parts vechda !! :P - UnitedDj.com

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Santa nehar ch dig gya,te rabb nu keha, "rabba menu bacha lai,main tere chaawal chadawanga" rabb ne usnu baahar kadh ditta. baahar nikal k Santa kehnda "kehde chaawal"... rabb ne usnu fer nehar ch sutt ditta. Santa kehnda "mein ta eh puchda c,kehde chaawal. MITHE ya LOON wale... :P - UnitedDj.com

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Santa: hotel me khaali katori me roti dubo kar kha rha tha. Waiter: ye kaise khaa rahe ho? Santa: SHUT UP main Maths teacher hun. DAAL maine SUPPOSE ki hui hai. :P - UnitedDj.com

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Bush- Tujhe swiming aati hai? Lalu- No Bush- Tere se to Kutta acha hai jo swim kar leta hai Lalu- Tuje aati hai? Bush- Ya Lalu- Fir tere or Kute me kya fark hai - UNitedDj.com

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ਅਮਲੀ :: ਰਾਜਾ ਦਸ਼ਰਥ ਦੀਆਂ ਤਿੰਨ ਰਾਣੀਆ ਸੀ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ :: ਤੇ ਫਿਰ ? . ਅਮਲੀ :: ਇਸ ਦਾ ਮਤਲਬ ਮੈ ਦੋ ਵਿਆਹ ਹੋਰ ਕਰ ਸਕਦਾ ਘਰਵਾਲੀ :: ਦਰੋਪਦੀ ਦਾ ਨਾਮ ਸੁਣੀਆ ਏ ? . ਅਮਲੀ :: ਤੂੰ ਵੀ ਪਾਗਲ ਹੀ ਏਂ, ਦਿਲ ਤੇ ਲਾ ਲੈਣੀ ਏ ਮੈ ਤਾਂ ਮਜ਼ਾਕ ਕਰ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ :P - UnitedDj.com

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#ਬੱਚਾ ਘਰੋ ਕੁੱਟ ਖਾ ਕੇ #ਸਕੂਲ ਜਾ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਤੇ ਬਹੁਤ ਗੁੱਸੇ ਵਿੱਚ ਸੀ ਰਾਹ ਵਿੱਚ ਕਿਸੇ ਨੇ ਪੁੱਛਿਆ :- "ਬੱਚਾ ਜੀ ਪੜ੍ਹਦੇ ਓ " ਬੱਚਾ :- ਨਹੀਂ ਸਾਲਿਆ, ਸਕੂਲ ਦੀ #Dress ਪਾ ਕੇ ਤੇਰੀ ਮਾਂ ਦੇ #ਵਿਆਹ ਚੱਲਿਆਂ ! ਤੂੰ ਜਾਣਾ ?? :D :P - UnitedDj.com

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A GIRLFRIEND msgd her boyfriend (PAPPU) at 7am : . . If u r sleeping send me UR #Dreams, If u r crying send me UR #Tears, If u r laughing send me UR #Smiles" . . . . Pappu - "Potty kar rha hu bheju kya" . . No reply from girl.. xD Darr gayi bechari.......hahaha :P - UNitedDj.com

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Malinga's mom :: Beta haircut kara lena !!! #Malinga :: Kyu maa? . . . . . . . . . Malinga's Mom :: purane peetal ke bartan dhone hain scrubber chahiye :D :v - UnitedDj.com

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ਅਮਲੀ ਜਲੇਬੀਆਂ ਵੇਚ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਪਰ ਉਹ "ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ" ਕਹਿ ਕੇ ਵੇਚ ਰਿਹਾ ਸੀ ਇਕ ਬੰਦਾ ਕੋਲ ਆ ਕੇ ਕਹਿੰਦਾ :- ਵੇਚ ਤਾਂ ਤੂੰ ਜਲੇਬੀਆਂ ਰਿਹਾ ਏਂ ਤੇ "ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ ਆਲੂ ਲੈਲੋ" ਕਹੀ ਜਾ ਰਿਹਾ ਏ ਦਿਮਾਗ ਤਾਂ ਨਹੀਂ ਖਰਾਬ ਹੋ ਗਿਆ ਤੇਰਾ ? . . ਅਮਲੀ :- ਚੁਪ ਕਰ ਸਾਲਿਆ ਨਹੀਂ ਤਾਂ ਮੱਖੀਆਂ ਆ ਜਾਣਗੀਆਂ - UnitedDJ.com

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ਇਕ ਕੁੜੀ ਹਲਵਾਈ ਦੀ ਦੁਕਾਨ ਤੇ ਗਈ ਤੇ ਕਹਿੰਦੀ:-> ਜੀ ਪੂਰੀਆਂ ਪਾਰੀਆਂ ਮਿਲ ਜਾਣਗੀਆਂ.....? ਅੱਗੋ ਹਲਵਾਈ ਬੋਲਿਆ :-> . . "ਪੂਰੀਆਂ" ਤਾ ਮੁੱਕ ਗਈਆਂ "ਪਾਰੀਆਂ" ਜਿਨੀਆਂ ਮਰਜੀ ਲੈ ਲੋ.... ;) =) - UnitedDj.com

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Boy1 :: Meet my Wife Tina.. Boy2 :: Oh! I know her.. . . Boy1 :: oh How.. ?? Boy2 :: actually we were caught sleeping together :| . . Boy1 :: what.. ?? What the hell.. ?? :@ Boy2 :: during lecture in maths class dude... Think Positive yaar... :D :P - UnitedDj.com

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Santa's marriage got fixed for 2nd November. He sent an Invite to all his friends: . . . . Marriage is on 2nd, please come on the Ist Night. . We'll all have fun together! :P haha :v - UnitedDj.com

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Wife hit her husband with frying pan. Husband: What was that for…? Wife: I found a paper in your pocket with the name Jenny on it. Husband: I took part in a race last week and Jenny was the name of my horse. Wife: Sorry..! Next day wife hit him with the frying pan again Husband: What now..? Wife: Your horse is on the Phone. :) :P :D - UnitedDj.com

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Machchhar Ka Bachcha Paheli Baar Uda. Jab Wapis Aaya To Baap Ne Pucha,Kaisa Laga? Machchhar-Bahut Achchha,Jaha B Gaya Log TALIYA Baja Rahe the - UnitedDj.com

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Boy 1:" tune us ladki ke liye Cigarette chhor di..?? . . Boy 2:" haan Boy 1:" daru bhi chhor diya..?? Boy 2:" haan! . . . Boy 1:" Jua bhi chhor diya..??? . . Boy 2:" haan!! Boy 1:" abey to shaadi kyu nahi ki usse ???? . . . Boy 2:" yaar itna sudhar gya tha k usse achhi mil gyi aur usey chhor diya...:p :O :D - UnitedDj.com

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Dr:Kaise aana hua? Santa: Doctorsaab tabiyat theek nahi hain Dr: Sharab peete ho? Santa: Peeta to hoon, par chhota peg hi banana. I'm not feeling well !=)) - UnitedDj.com

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Kehte hai khuda ne is jaha mai sabhi k liye kisi na kisi ko banaya hai.. . . . . . . . . . . . . Meri wali ne toh lagta hai suicide kar liya hai saali milti hi nahi... :-( - unitedDj.com

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Santa Banta Aur Pappu Picnic Par Gaye Wahan Ja Kar Yaad Aaya Ke Pepsi To Ghar Bhool Gaye, . Decide Kiya Ke Pappu Ja Kar Pepsi Le Aaye, . Pappu:- Main Is Shart Par JaungaKi Tum Mere Aane Tak Samose Nhi Khaoge... . Dono Ne Kaha Theek Hai, 1 Din Guzar Gaya Pappu Nhi Aaya,2 Din GuzarGaye 2no Ne Socha KeAb Samose Kha Lene Chahiye, Dono Ne Jaise Hi Samosa Uthaya.. Pappu Ped Ke Peche Se Nikal Ke Bola... . Aise Karoge To Main Nhi Jaonga.. - UnitedDj.com

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Police: Car Gas Par Hai Veeru : Nahi Sir Police: Petrol Par Veeru : Nahi Sir Police: Diesel Par Veeru : Nahi Sir Police: Phir Kis Par Hai Veeru: Installment Par Hai. - UnitedDj,com

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Santa Ke Bete Ka Acident Ho Gaya Dr: Aapke Bete K Pair Katne Padenge.. Santa Ne Apna Sir Pakda. Dr: Kya Hua Santa: Kal Hi Nalayak Ko Chapal Dilai Thi. - UnitedDj.com

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What is difference between- 1. Boyfrend, 2. Lover, 3. Husband 4. EX boyfrend. simple..yaar 1. prepaid, 2. postpaid, 3. Lifetime, 4. Coin box.!. - UnitedDj.com

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Tution sir: abey gadhe , homework kyun nahi kiya. New age student: tameez se baat kar sale, customer se koi aise baat karta hai kya? - UnitedDj.com

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Santa ne Ghar ka Darwaza ukhara or kandhe pe rakh k Bazar me gya.. . 1 Admi ne pucha:" santa, Kya Darwaza Bechnahai.. ?? . Santa:" Nhi Tala Khulwana hai.. Chabi gum ho gye hai.. Hanso mat Joke abhi aage hai.. . . . . Admi santa se:" Agar ghar me chor ghus gayato.. ?? . . Santa :" abe Andar kaise jayega darwaza to humare paas hai.. Hahaha .... - UnitedDj.com

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Boy n girl on fb girl:- “u never smile na??” boy:-“hw can u say dis??” ... girl:-“ur smiling pics r mising here” boy:-“ok then …do u bath daily??” girl:-“ya ofcorse..y u asking??” boy:-“no, I hvnt seen .any pic….” :D :D :D - UnitedDj.com

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Veeru apni bhabhi ko bahut maar raha tha, Logo ne pucha:" kya hua Veeru..??? Veeru bola:" meri bhabhi acchi aurat nahi hai, . . Logo ne pucha:" kyu kya hua..??? Veeru bola:" yaar mere dost mobile pe baat karte hai, jis se bhi pucho:" kis se baat kar rahe ho..??? . . sab bolte hein:" . . . . . "TERI BHABHI SE... - UnitedDj.com

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Apki Bato Pe DiL Haru WAH! WAH! Apki Surat Pe Jan Waru WAH! WAH! Jis Din NHi Aata Apka SMS DiL Krta H Apko patak-patak k Maru! Ab BoLo Wah! Wah! - UnitedDj.com

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Santa apni gf k gar pe rat me milne gya . Santa - chalo ab hum thoda pyar kar lete h . Gf -nhi .meri ma dekh legi . Santa -nhi dekh sakegi .meri jimmedari hai . Meri jimmedari hai. (gf ki ma jag jati h or ladki ki pitai karne lagti h ) santa - meri koi jimmedari nhi h . - UnitedDJ.com

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Santa:Dr.mein jab baat karta hu 2 muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai,aadmi nahi dikhta.Dr:Aisa kab hota hai Santa:Phone karte waqt. - UnitedDj.com

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Never KISS a lady police She will say .hands up. Never KISS a lady doctor She will say, Next please Always KISS a lady teacher, She will say, repeat it 5 time - UnitedDj.com

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Sari Raat Unka Number Hum Milaate Rahe, . Customer Care Wali Aunty Kehti Sajan Apke Busy Kisi Aur K Sath, Hum Re-dial Pe Re-dial Dabaate Rahe, . Raat Se Subah Hone Ko Aa Gai, Subah Jab Hui Unse Mulakat, Iljam Ek Duje Par Lagaate Rahe, . Gusse Me Call Register CheckKiya To Pata Chala, Ke Hum Unko Aur Vo Hume Ek Hi Time Pe No. Milaate Rahe.! - UnitedDj.com

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